Ne'er get thee stitched til Booris be ditched: UK General Election 2019

i've always believed that there's room in the Labour Party for all pronunciations of the word "scone" but i cannot bring myself to vote for notorious antiscoonite Jarmy Crowbar

real heads know it’s pronounced ‘skoon’

heavens, it's pronounced 'roundcake' you oiks

scones are just edible paperweights. I'm minced pies till the death.

macaroni pies or gtfo

can delicately nibble at macaroni pies off the plate whilst requesting more tea from the vicar?

fuck's sake dude i want a mince pie now and i'm fucked if i'm going to the shop in the dark

best snack going when you need a quick energy boost without having to resort to any kitchen work.

i may be going to the shop in the dark, the craving is strong

find myself craving stollen more than mince pies these days

stollen goods

The foodstuff is "sconn"

The Scottish village is "skoon"

Thank you.

i've not been feeling v stolleny lately but my appetite is weird

always got time for a lebkuchen tho

scone outta dat

Btw if anyone knows if you can get speculaasbrokken in London, please let me know where!

Aldi are doing massive pan d’oro for £3.49 right now, just in case you’re after 750g of very bitey sweet bread covered in vanilla powdered sugar. Probably have speculoos spread too, next to the fake Nutella.

you don't get this level of incisive commentary on the Trump threads

xp Aldi is great for speculaas alright but I am assured by my friend that it’s different (more cakey than biscuity?)

not only have i got mince pies but Bacardi Spiced was on offer, glad i made the effort now

https://scontent.fhuy1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/s960x960/76759932_2562097167205130_3730106271110529024_o.jpg?_nc_cat=103&_nc_oc=AQlMxavcznexYtTa85X58APU7ZNo536u7FaiX9pWHDATyK3M1xxzmMPTn8lsNA1dYYU&_nc_ht=scontent.fhuy1-1.fna&oh=1aef5c83fb8c1487f7d0feeb7a5172aa&oe=5E3F60E4

1.5 million people have registered to vote in the first two weeks, more than double 2017

!

guy i've played cricket with many times (and given lbw for 0, much to his anger) is a BXP candidate haha

jesus, there is an audible "you did very well" from Marr at the end of his Corbyn interview before the credits rolled this morning.

and then he patted him on the head and offered him a lollipop

i'm cynical enough about the bbc to think it was a contrived incident tbh.

General Election: Farage says claims Tories bribed Brexit party candidates are 'fact' – live news https://t.co/epV5iuyzao pic.twitter.com/Q9vAnTPKXN

— The Guardian (@guardian) November 17, 2019

what is this guy's deal anyway is he like a quintuple reverse agent or something

he's a busted flush, a corpse in a coffin dreaming he's still alive.

the brookstein endorsement is LOCKED IN, the election is over

I am unashamedly voting Labour this election. I never entered X Factor to win it. I never felt winning X Factor made me special. I've always enjoyed singing but I learned in the short period of fame that a few people have all the power. It's time for real change. https://t.co/GO9jSX6F5y

— Steve Brookstein (@stevebrookstein) November 15, 2019

Waiting til I hear from Pudsey tbh

subo too

.@SusanBoyle @Stormzy
🤝
Voting Labour pic.twitter.com/bdZxkWqtPK

— Scottish Labour (@scottishlabour) November 16, 2019

Steve Brookstein is ...not an endorsement they want

oh dear

Brookstein has been at the centre of several controversies for his opinions on the Twitter social network. In July 2013, he defended child murderer Jon Venables against media scrutiny.[32] On 23 May 2017, after the Manchester Arena bombing, he sparked outrage by suggesting that Theresa May could have been behind the terror attack as a distraction after a difficult day of Tory campaigning.[33] On 29 August 2018, responding to a news story about the increase of self-harm amongst teenage girls, he suggested that bullying "stupid kids" was an alternative to self-harm.[34] Brookstein temporarily deactivated his Twitter account following this incident.

On 15 September 2019 he tweeted “The hypocrisy of gay men discussing HIV is astonishing. They don't like HIV being compared to obesity or smoking. Yes it is unfortunate and treatable but so is obesity and smoking. #GarethThomas”. He was criticised for his lack of empathy towards the former Welsh rugby captain who had been forced to out himself as HIV Undetectable by a tabloid newspaper. His tweet was also deemed homophobic by furious responders to his tweet. He was also challenged for his ignorance of the facts of HIV in 2019.

Pudsey would never come out with this shit

damn i knew if i googled Pudsey would turn out to be dead :(

tbf i said the election was over, i didn’t say labour were gonna win

apropos of nothing, has anyone asked jedward who they’re voting for

pretty sure they're Sinn Fein

Jedward’s constituency elected a Labour TD every year until after their Eurovision appearances. The same small town also produced Brian who won Big Brother 2.

i know a fella whose uncle offered him free room in the apartment complex down by eircom when he moved up to dublin for his first job. yon cunts were the apartment next door, he lasted three days and went off to rent the lower single in a bunkbed on the SCR for half his salary instead.

if i had to guess i figure aontú but id need to sit down and develop the theory

I saw Pudsey on Friday, I should've asked him.

Extremely here for how this is being addressed. No handwringing over very real and legitimate concerns

Moraes said: “Gove is lying and I think they are going to continue lying for the campaign. The line that Gove used about ‘paying into’ the NHS is really an old-style racist trope and is designed to target Labour marginals where the vote is about leave or remain.

“You can’t pay into the NHS even if you wanted to. Michael Gove knows only too well that free movement is the new immigration and if you can conflate the two and throw in something about Aussie-style points system, you are saying to voters: ‘We will control EU migration, all the millions of “EU wasters”. We’re blocking them and the only brown and black people who come in will be heart surgeons or tech people.’ That’s the psychology of this, and it’s lethal.”

yeah, that's 100% great

Also, this train video is 100% a Corbyn-McDonnell production. Like why is Klopp in there?!

It's time to bring Britain's railways into the 21st century pic.twitter.com/NLgoic4QDI

— Jeremy Corbyn (@jeremycorbyn) November 18, 2019

lol at fred savage giving a hearty thumbs-up

good video, good messaging - labour are really doing well at drip-feeding all this positive stuff, so when i do vote libdem next month it will be with such a heavy heart

Ya, must reluctantly conclude that a labour vote in my constituency of Kensington and Chelsea would be a waste #winning here

real headz know to vote Notebook

Simon Notebook finished up writing his conclusions on the case. He liked to write in French, something about the language gave him a sense of clarity. Janet didn't speak French, but they had a telepathic connection, everyone in the team was razor sharp, both with the banter but also the smarts. Two steps ahead at all times, she was one smart cookie, she just knew. She was going places alright, the Met would come calling soon enough. "Yass Kween" he chuckled under his breath. He wasn't quite ready to use it yet, but it was right there in his bullet point journal. Under 'Y'. Soon the time would come for him to use it, just a question of deploying successfully, at the most appropriate moment. He idly flicked to 'I'. 'Insane in the membrane, Janet Civils got a playne". He had planned to do it at the karaoke last Christmas, but came down with IBS and had to miss it. He underlined it, with a undulating wavy sort of line that reminded him of the sea in Dorset. Double underlying of "playne" for emphasis. It bugged him that it didn't rhyme properly, did it give it an extra fizz, or was it corny Still got a month to figure out some alternatives. Notebook liked alternatives, being able to switch plans at short notice was what made him stand out

We'll do it this time, Notebook, don't you worry!

Incredible that Klopp is in that video.

Could be divisive for fans of MCFC, MUFC, EFC, et al.

Btw if anyone knows if you can get speculaasbrokken in London, please let me know where!

― gyac, Sunday, November 17, 2019 6:06 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

https://evilsquirrelsnest.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/wall-crash.jpg?w=584

Your best bet would probably be Hema I think! They've quite some Dutch 'December treats' in London shops, it seems.

There's this place in Highgate but that seems to be mostly about spices etc to make your own.

anvil is now obligated to do at least one of those every two or three days

Ty LBI! My friend appreciates that link!

Paul Mason is a bit dodge these days but this amused me (from his twitter):
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EJph5CAXkAYxZcw?format=jpg&name=large