Ne'er get thee stitched til Booris be ditched: UK General Election 2019

I was at Labour's official campaign launch yesterday.

JC was inspirational.

The Guardian immediately reported it as: Doubts about JC's future.

Maybe this is really one for the Guardian thread.

s/o to the awful B listers about to be unseated like kirstene hair, ross thomson, ben bradley etc

Nashwan, you forgot Swinson losing to SNP!

I forgot Scotland altogether tbfttl but yes all Tories north of the Wall

No way is Jared O'Mara contesting his seat? Watching Gapes go should be fun as well. Also Chris Leslie.

I forgot Mara had withdrawn too yes, can't keep up

When do those fairness rules kick in?

Excellent from Momentum: https://www.mycampaignmap.com/

'No events found here' lol.

xxp
after Colbyn has had a few more kickings and his stasi collaboration files and a photo of childhood him stomping a rabbit to death have been posted to 40 million homes.

excuse me, he pogo-sticked a rabbit to death iirc

in case you missed the reference

pic.twitter.com/2LdE1hJNoj

— The Trashies (@TheTrashiesUK) November 1, 2019

one's a deranged clown bent on reshaping the world to fit his depraved vision and the other is &c &c

otm

What this highlights is Corbyn’s bravery. That Miliband can come out with this now is worth something but Corbyn’s bravery as leader has created the space. https://t.co/TpI61Aup25

— Tom Gann (@Tom_Gann) November 1, 2019

Corbyn first showed this bravery when he spotted that a friend's rabbit was actually evil and possessed by the spirit of General Woundwort ....

i take some optimism from the grading-on-a-curve situation. (As said, the Tories need a decent majority here to win, Lab just needs enough to cobble together a fuck-Brexit pact.)

Stop Brexit would be lovely/funny but it's hard to get energized about a Labour government strapped to the festering corpse of the Lib Dems when it comes to the real business of actually making this country one percent less shitty

I can't see any circumstances under which the Lib Dems would go into any sort of governing coalition with Corbyn. It would have to be Labour and SNP or Labour, Lib Dems and SNP with a leader of the LD's choosing.

yeah, i was gonna say, swindon has made it abundantly clear that the idea of actually doing something decent for once in her life is abhorrent, so i don't think we'll be seeing a lablib coalition in this timeline

Swindon will be gone on the 12th but possibly replaced by some other abhorrent twat

Agree with all above. I honestly think it's more conceivable LibDem, despite their Brexit stance, would hitch up - again - with the Tories than w/ Labour.

some might even suggest that it's secretly what they're hoping for

oh i think that's entirely possible but it's also possible that a Labour minority government will have to come to some sort of rapprochement with the Lib Dems

True, true.

'secretly' in the sense that they're hoping that the voting public isn't going to notice all the tories they've been hoovering up into their ranks recently and who are now pressing their leering faces against the undulating, straining skein of the libdem body politic as they hunger for the blood of the sick, the poor and the old xxp

and that's just Chuka

he must be excited at the prospect of finally getting the chance to have a real hand in murdering society's undesirables

"We have always been pragmatists not idealogues, and as such we think we are best placed, as Remainers, to steer a clear path into a post-Brexit future alongside the Conservatives, keeping them on the straight and narrow

The country has to come together and it is incumbent on us, the adults in the room, to make the first move and offer an olive branch to those who have a different view on our future. Brexit is going to happen, that much is now inevitable, it can happen without us, or with us, guiding and even leading the process, who better than a strong Remainer to forge a path that avoids the pitfalls of the worst excesses of extremists on our left and right, and begin the healing process

Jo"

just choked back a bit of vomit there, cheers anvil

I bought my laptop second hand from a Lib Dem MP and I just found this weird file that's called "gullible scum ha ha ha". It's just hundreds of bar charts with them in 2nd place, even the seats where they already have MPs.

— Simon Hedges #BeKindOnline (@Orwell_Fan) October 31, 2019

I'm thinking here of the first SNP Holyrood adminstration, which ran as a minority with loads of people who hated them. And look at them now.

Yeah, no chance at all of a LD coalition, especially not a long-lasting one, but it'd be very difficult for them not to support a minority Lab govt's 2nd ref bill.

yeah, i was gonna say, swindon has made it abundantly clear that the idea of actually doing something decent for once in her life is abhorrent, so i don't think we'll be seeing a lablib coalition in this timeline

And Lib Dems never break their promises.

No chance of it from the Labour direction, the Lib Dems meanwhile would go into a coalition with anyone.

apropos of nothing, was just reminded of vince cable's 'erotic spasm' and now my weekend is ruined

Agree with all above. I honestly think it's more conceivable LibDem, despite their Brexit stance, would hitch up - again - with the Tories than w/ Labour.

― Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, 1 November 2019 bookmarkflaglink

Except LDs won't help the Tories deliver Brexit. It's a bigger thing for them than tuition fees, and they know the damage from last time they told lies.

Besides, Swinson might not survive this election. I don't actually think they will be able to by-pass the Labour membership's preference for a left-wing leader to select their own leader. Corbyn may not survive but it won't be at the expense of policy.

xps

Vince Cable slash thread y/n?

we're posting in it afaic

There’s no way in Hell that Labour as the largest party would let a junior coalition partner shout the odds on who their leader is.

are their rules to allow for the leadership to change without a leadership election?

oh, bollockspaws...

1,000+ RTs for this absolutely untrue bullshit. Twitter is a joke sometimes. https://t.co/qU3qO61Pa0

— James Ball (@jamesrbuk) November 1, 2019

it's true, twitter is a joke sometimes

Vince Cable slash thread y/n?

― Xia Nu del Vague (Noodle Vague), Friday, November 1, 2019 1:47 PM (twenty-one minutes ago)

To be called "Laying down some heavy Cable"

Memories of Cable's treat!

More good stuff: https://insider.labour.org.uk/factcheck/100-days-boris-johnson-lying/

What utter cunts

MRP PROJECTION - CHELSEA AND FULHAM

CON: 38% (-15)
LDEM: 31% (+20)
LAB: 17% (-16)
GRN: 7% (+5)
BXP: 7%

via @BestForBritain/@YouGov/@focaldataHQ

Another huge swing from both Con and Lab to the Lib Dems here, proving once again that things have changed massively since 2017.

— The Torch (@thetorchsays) November 1, 2019

oh i think that's entirely possible but it's also possible that a Labour minority government will have to come to some sort of rapprochement with the Lib Dems

They almost certainly will and both parties will be up for it in the circumstances. Anything they say beforehand is smoke and mirrors.

Someone called Rob Ford with some soothing words..

1. Most Lab votes in Leave seats Farage is targeting voted Remain in 2016
2. The voters who will find BXP most attractive in such seats likely to be those who voted UKIP in 2015
3. Most of those voters backed Con in 2017
4. Therefore, BXP will typically (tho not always) hurt Con more than Lab in such seats. Just as (and indeed because) UKIP’s collapse in 2017 benefitted Con more than Lab in such seats

Though isn't this relying on the "I've always voted Labour before but..." constituency having remained static since the last election? Notwithstanding that the people who say this in vox pops are invariably lying imo.

I wouldn't fuss too much re the likes of Chelsea & Fulham. The fact they're at the high end of attainable for Labour at all since 2017 still means Labour would need to p much obliterate the LD vote (or not have to contest one) there to take it.

Either that crowd are lying or they’re so statistically insignificant as to make no difference - esp when you consider the massive increases in majorities most Labour MPs picked up last time out.

We’re certain to say goodbye to Ian Austin and John Woodcock this time.

Tom Gann otfm re Miliband.

Labour were 20+ points adrift last time and couldn’t have won the seat unless they literally hoovered up every single LD/Green vote