part of coming to terms with that experience has been, well... claiming all the ways I created it. for as impressed as i was by him, didn't i allure him as well? aren't i worthy of desire? it seems i might be!! i have to give myself some creditand in context, the spiritual aspect (such as it was) held as much to do with personal practices i'd been performing for several months leading up to the whole shebang. it didn't come from nowhere! but this dude was the catalyst that precipitated a lot of weird stuff for me, including some gender trouble, so it def threw meand so here i am with all this epic meaning built up around this one night stand with a touring musician and oh my GOD have you ever seen such a pathetic sight, bless my lil faggot heart
― gwyneth anger (patron sailor), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 04:33 (four years ago) link
i appreciate you all for your forbearance as i puke feelings, i don't really have another bucket for these right now :(
― gwyneth anger (patron sailor), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 04:35 (four years ago) link
I've lost my ability to pick up guys at bars 100%, and that's not a recent development
been 100% unboyfriendable my entire life
so everything's been simple for awhile, and I can spiral into being unhireable with onerous medical bills w/out any distractions
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 11:00 (four years ago) link
pursuing sex is the worst fucking thing in the world when youre bad at it
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 11:12 (four years ago) link
(and as for working out to be a more enticing ho, fuck that shit now and forever)
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 11:17 (four years ago) link
bless you morbs, you are a constant in these uncertain times.
― gwyneth anger (patron sailor), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 17:15 (four years ago) link
well that's what plagues me
should i go to the Gay Bar in Exile on H'ween night? no costume plans
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 17:25 (four years ago) link
"strange loop" popped up on my playlist again and i just want everyone in the world to hear larry owens singing "Second Wave"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYGQIjQqMdQ
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Wednesday, 30 October 2019 22:57 (four years ago) link
i remember you saying once that you didn't like big dicks because it was like handling a trumpet and i think about that often
My feelings about this topic have revised somewhat
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, 31 October 2019 14:38 (four years ago) link
i am trying to decide whether to go to brooklyn on monday for a high school a cappella group reunion of sorts. on the one hand i'm not trying to revisit that time in my life rn; on the other, maybe it's worth going. i've been trying to remember who i was as a young performer and why and how i let that thing that brought me such joy fade from my life.
― gwyneth anger (patron sailor), Thursday, 31 October 2019 16:05 (four years ago) link
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, October 31, 2019 10:38 AM (two hours ago)bookmarkflaglink
stan
the perfect big dick is about 7.5 inches, anything else is too much work
― J0rdan S., Thursday, 31 October 2019 17:17 (four years ago) link
or just hazardous
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 31 October 2019 17:19 (four years ago) link
Protein-rich diets, man.
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 31 October 2019 17:27 (four years ago) link
hi patron!!!! good to have you back
i really don't know if i feel there is too big...
what a lovely guy i saw last night! we've been hanging out a lot-ish. he called out of the blue and had me over his apartment, where he made me a caeser salad with homemade croutons, fed me a lot of wine and dessert, and then blew me in the kitchen
https://media.giphy.com/media/jnDikQttGnBGNlXGzM/giphy.gif
― surm, Thursday, 31 October 2019 17:33 (four years ago) link
Um ok I have a fuckbuddy now and I don’t know what to tell you, I was smiling and gasping the entire time and we’ve been texting each other all day like “wtf was that” and “when can I see you again” and I am looking forward to many sleepovers with the man
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Friday, 1 November 2019 00:25 (four years ago) link
are you doing this on weekday nights? I get around a bit and can't think of fuckbuddies on Tuesday nights, say.
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 1 November 2019 00:30 (four years ago) link
so nice congrats!!!!
― surm, Friday, 1 November 2019 18:52 (four years ago) link
I am on my way over to his place right now and I’ve been thinking of his redacted in my redacted for 36 hours straight and the best part of all of it is how Loving and Sweet he is this is some truly healing bullshit
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Friday, 1 November 2019 20:15 (four years ago) link
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwSEXUAL HEALING BRO
― surm, Friday, 1 November 2019 20:33 (four years ago) link
I can’t say “best sex of my life” because that typically happens around the one year mark of a relationship for me but this is truly some insane thing that is happening, my body and mind feel transformed
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Saturday, 2 November 2019 13:22 (four years ago) link
my body feels transformed too but that's because of my bodywork practitioner Nicole
no but seriously i felt like a Victorian whore this weekend i must have had 4 people in and out of the apartment. i don't know if being single is the best thing that ever happened to me or i'm going to do early from some rare form of syphilis
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 19:09 (four years ago) link
you're in luck as there's only one form iirc but the butt shot's a bitch
― cheese canopy (map), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 19:14 (four years ago) link
umi had that butt shot last yearand i honestly felt i was dyingi was in bed for 10 hoursand then i watched "it follows"
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 19:18 (four years ago) link
hahaha it most certainly does
― cheese canopy (map), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 19:19 (four years ago) link
I was lying in bed with my buddy a few days ago, he's a professional classical pianist, and we were talking about our favourite piano music. I told him how much I loved the Ives "Concord Sonata" and he said he'd never heard it, but he'd check it out.
A couple days later (yesterday), I had a bad fight with my ex-bf (I'm moving out today, the fight was resolved last night, all is well), but my buddy knew I was having a hard time. To cheer me up he sent me a video of him at the piano. He'd learned the third movement of "Concord" in the intervening 36 hours and played it perfectly and I watched the video and started sobbing in the street.
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:06 (four years ago) link
LIKE WHAT A FUCKING NICE THING TO DO
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:07 (four years ago) link
<3 <3 <3 that is so incredibly sweet
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:07 (four years ago) link
fgti now makes two posters in this thread to be fucking a professional classic pianist
― J0rdan S., Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:17 (four years ago) link
I didn't feel particularly badly about my station in love life until now. Thanks, thread.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:18 (four years ago) link
Just kidding tho. Honestly, I've never been hurt so consistently and reliably than by trained musicians. (No offense intended.)
PS J0rdy I saw you on grindr the other day cuteface xxxx
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:26 (four years ago) link
it helps that i see mine about 3x a year and we keep it kinky
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:27 (four years ago) link
In 2005, I was fucking a painter.
A house painter.
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:28 (four years ago) link
When I was a painter I painted you wellToo bad I have to dieYou brought the essentials, perversion appealAnd many lovers at one time
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:30 (four years ago) link
― surm, Tuesday, November 5, 2019 4:26 PM (ten minutes ago)bookmarkflaglink
omg wait what! i do not have grindr
― J0rdan S., Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:37 (four years ago) link
is someone using my picture to catfish...
wait WAHT. it looked...so much like youlike i was sure
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:41 (four years ago) link
if you see it again screenshot and send it to me... now im really curious
― J0rdan S., Tuesday, 5 November 2019 21:57 (four years ago) link
i sure will
― surm, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 22:28 (four years ago) link
hi
― surm, Friday, 8 November 2019 23:35 (four years ago) link
i have a date tonight with a 26 year old named Jacob. i like him a lot, he's nice and sweet in that way you really don't find often. authentic, awkward. it's really lovely. only thing is the first time we hung out i had to ask him to use my mouthwash. if this is a perpetual problem i might have to duck out.
― surm, Friday, 8 November 2019 23:36 (four years ago) link
where do you find these men? (be as general in your answer as you like)
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 9 November 2019 05:30 (four years ago) link
Acquaintances, always, me. Rebound and I are getting attached in an apprehensive but real way, the sex is yes actually “the best of my life” and he is expressing the same both verbally and with his body language, what narrative is contained in the next twenty pages?
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Saturday, 9 November 2019 05:56 (four years ago) link
personally i’m excited to find out
― J0rdan S., Saturday, 9 November 2019 06:08 (four years ago) link
fgti this is a very exciting time in a friendship, i’m happy for you
My ex and I broke up for many reasons but chief amongst them was a perceived “lack of sexual chemistry” on his end; I was resentful and annoyed that a life together was being thrown over for something that could be, you know, worked on?
But after [redacted] and [redacted, redacted] the other night and I was left babbling and hallucinating? I started crying a little, like, wow, he was right. We really didn’t have that chemistry and I guess I’d forgotten was truly amazing sex could do to a man, you know?
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Saturday, 9 November 2019 14:12 (four years ago) link
i had a similar realization after my break up!
― J0rdan S., Saturday, 9 November 2019 17:47 (four years ago) link
my ex and i opened our relationship upon my insistence bcuz the sex really wasn't working for me, and i ended up having far more satisfying sex with other guys. in turn, it did make the sex w/ my ex better but i chalked the years of often unsatisfying sex up to simply what happens between two ppl in a relationship. but my relationships since then have taught me that in fact my ex and i just didn't have sexual chemistry, and that it could only be worked on to a very small extent, and that i was much better off in a sexually satisfying relationship. and, on the other hand, my ex used to say that he just didn't have that much of a sex drive, but i think he probably realizes now he just didn't like having sex w/ me that much.
― J0rdan S., Saturday, 9 November 2019 17:52 (four years ago) link
there is no better physical high that i've felt than in the moments after an incredible orgasm. it's real!
― J0rdan S., Saturday, 9 November 2019 17:56 (four years ago) link
Yeah. I reacted badly, both internally and externally, to certain of his comments. I couldn’t understand why he felt more attracted to “sex with anons” than sex with me. (Granted, he extremely crossed the line several times, sexting my friends, hooking up with his exes, and other stuff I won’t get into.)
It was destroying me! And when all the onus for our lack of chemistry was dumped on me? It fucking SUCKED. I’m glad I’m gone.
But we’re getting along great now as friends since I moved out and I’m remembering great sex and having my mind blown on the reg and I hope my ex is too
― that said, I’d prefer a single serving of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Saturday, 9 November 2019 20:53 (four years ago) link