PMs change and lol we're all gonna die (but brexit will never end)

He's related to the Queen. Or sumthin'.

He’s gonna treat himself to a ruff.

The ladies like a bit of it.

The fucking state of this pt.15643

Great that @bbclaurak will be joining @DouglasKMurray, Rod Liddle and me in the political wing of Wormwood Scrubs when Comrade Corbyn seizes power.

— Toby Young (@toadmeister) September 18, 2019

Retweeted by Alison Pearson, obviously devastated she'd been left of the list and who is still insisting Mr Salem was "pretending to be a normal user of the NHS".

I mean, if only there WAS room in the Scrubs, amirite?

it's no good locking up enemies of the people, they need to be used as fertiliser.

yet more evidence that a corbyn premiership would usher in a better world

Wormwood Scrubs too good for 'em.

yeah Tobes really doesn't realise what's coming for him

Pannick is a cross bench peer as well as a QC. They are now hearing his submission with the weight of a parliamentarian behind it - as to the right remedy.
I'm calling this for the Claimants. I think it's over.

— Dinah Rose QC (@DinahRoseQC) September 19, 2019

Pannick is good, pity about that Scottish clown paying for the cameras yesterday though.

Toby Young's already seeking asylum in Budapest I see.

That's it, court is adjourned.

The judges will take the weekend to consider and we'll have their answer early next week.

— Hannah Al-Othman (@HannahAlOthman) September 19, 2019

lol it's like test cricket is this

Hopefully now this is over my brain will stop looping the chorus of 'Senser - Age of Panic' at least until early next week

5 weeks'll be up before they've made their minds up

the thought had occurred to me

"and in a shock double whammy ruling, Toby Young to be sent to Wormwood Scrubs' nonce wing"

even though Julie Burchill is awful, her withering descriptions of what an imbecilic, nasty, shallow little spoilt brat man-boy Toby Young was from their Modern Review days were very amusing at the time. He was a kerb crawler, he was rudely baldist against Nick Hornby even though he was receding himself, he worshipped celebrities to the point he said he'd give Stallone a blow-job.. there was more but I've forgotten tbh because he's not that interesting, but I would be genuinely happy if I heard he'd been shot dead or something

he was rudely baldist against Nick Hornby even though he was receding himself

truly the worst of all possible crimes

He actually said NH shouldn't be writing for the MR because he was "too bald and old looking"

I wrote music stuff for Modern Review under Kodwo Eshun and I will always hate Toby Young for spiking all the work people did on what turned out to be the final issue and replacing it with his ‘best of’ to serve as a calling card for his move to America and Vanity Fair.

he'd give Stallone a blow-job

'cup the balls, work the shaft' is sly's preferred technique toby iirc

NH shouldn't be writing cos he's shite tbf

truedat!

And bald.

no baldshaming itt pls

― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 6 September 2019 20:08 (one week ago) bookmarkflaglink

his cute middle class white boy with autism trope has become the template for shit autism drama for the last decade and a half now - the useless fucking smug slaphead!

sorry self-shamer here!

god imagine being stuck in a jail cell and the only thing to read was a choice between TY and NH, do you think you could fashion a solid rope out of papier mache?

the real flex would be growing your hair long and then using it as a noose

Hairy-kiri

hallo, where are we up to exactly one week later

i kind of know, yr allowed twitter in hospital these days, it's how they check if the beta blockers are powerful enough

they're not

"The government said it has sent the EU a ‘series of confidential technical non-papers’ outlining its ideas for Brexit."

In the sense that a fart is definitely not a paper.

Giving a speech in Madrid, Mr Barclay today said the government needs a year to come up with a replacement to the Irish backstop idea – but it still wants to leave on 31 October.
The cabinet minister said the EU has set Britain a test it ‘cannot meet’ with its demands for a backstop replacement.
Mr Barclay said: ‘We are told the UK must provide legally operative text by the 31 October, yet the alternative to the backstop is not necessary until the end of the Implementation Period in December 2020.
‘And this will be shaped by the future relationship – which is still to be determined.
‘In short, why risk crystallising an undesirable result this November, when both sides can work together until December 2020.’
He added: ‘The EU risks continuing to insist on a test that the UK cannot meet and that the UK Parliament has rejected three times.’

Stephen Barclay.... partially OTM?

omg mark are you ok? I missed you.

yes i am (they let me out)

but there is a good story to tell! i will write it up on the atrial fibbing thread tho (and not right now)

Yay!

in what way is barclay in any way otm

the backstop is a binding agreement in the event of uk not satisfying the ongoing requirements of the land border with roi and the necessities of the GFA

let them sign it as a show of good faith that they intend to resolve those issues within the implementation period

if they will not do so they demonstrate unequivocally their lack of serious interest in a negotiated consensus and no further discussions are necessary, prepare for ndb and disregard the nonsense coming from the uk delegation that is purely for the benefit of their own press

100% agree (sidetracked by mark coming back). Like there’s been zero good faith on the UK side, he’s literally just like, ah well let’s not be ~silly~ about this, we’re all friends here, who needs a binding written agreement?

Welcome back, mark. Hope you're alright.

Remember when some guy "confronted" Jeremy Corbyn by punching him in the head and instead of even slightly digging into or scrutinizing the politics and affiliations of the culprit, every melt journo had a wee giggle about it instead.

— ACAB Rees-Mogg (@jelly_pack) September 18, 2019

I wrote music stuff for Modern Review under Kodwo Eshun

Apologies Suzy but I did lol thinking of Mr Eshun sitting on you while you tried to write up your copy.

And welcome back Mark. Glad they let you out!

At pains* to point out that Kodwo commissioned me, rather than TY/JB.

*the lanky, bony-arsed git was sitting on me the whole time obvs.

He's otm only in that he's admitting that the government isn't within an ass's roar of an actual solution on the backstop.

Ministers will table "formal written solutions when we are ready" and not to an "artificial deadline"

https://i.imgur.com/SEdmZpC.png

all deadlines are artificial

thread of artificial fibbing