The car's on fire and there's no driver at the wheel - The Tory leadership elections

Anyone going on about the backstop and how it needs to be time limited or abolished and how the evil EU are trying to “annex” NI is acceptable to them; the moderates (if they exist) trying to pass a similar deal will very much not be. Anyone inconvenienced by reality will have the support withdrawn.

Also there is as far as I can see no way around the big problem - that the pronouncements any candidate needs to make in order to win are the exact same things that will lead them to fail at the job, even on their own terms.

Yep. They can promise and even get no deal - but they will still need to sit down with the EU for a deal in the end.

Re: DUP. As long as the winner pays up I don't see the problem. All good bar the backstop.

the GFA binds the EU also :)

LOLz if the Maybot is replaced by the Raabot. Could barely manage about 30 seconds of Marr inteviewing a vacuum this morning.

He genuinely thinks being a lawyer is a selling point.

the winner will be the biggest wife guy = it will be hunt vs gove

= it will be hunt

Hmmmmm

https://i.prcdn.co/img?regionKey=iWqH6b7%2BNqrQaR9yb6gwrw%3D%3D&scale=100

Heard some joker (been watching too much marvel shit probs) referring to Gove vs Boris as a "tantalising battle" on 5live earlier.

if it involved heavy blunt instruments and was to the death, sure

I mean, it'll involve at least one.

If Miliband can't run the country because he eats bacon like a horse I demand Michael Gove be held to the same standard for these atrocities pic.twitter.com/5rUeMatc8U

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) May 26, 2019

There was a decent joke about Gove in here - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2019/may/25/stephen-collins-on-boris-johnson-cartoon

i just passed Rory Stewart in the street, giving an interview to camera, and he was shockingly thin and twig-like, which i probably wouldn't have noticed except his suit was so large in comparison, it looked like it was going to swallow him head-first

Do not underestimate the determination of the skeletal man.

Has 10 Downing Street ever been a tabloid-style "love nest" before? Or has every PM in living memory been a smug married (apart from Heath of course)?

bet Stewart could still tek Gove in a feight. I could picture him having a preternaturally deadly strangle grip!

Marmite in the end today, better than no jam tomorrow.

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 26, 2019

Come again?

Gets my vote

wife guy vs yeast guy

i'm trying to delete it

You can see why most of these idiots end up talking like robots, as soon as they go off-piste they embarrass themselves 9 times out of 10.

Rory Stewart tells Sky News he would lock MPs in parliament right through summer recess until a Brexit deal is reached

— Kylie MacLellan (@kyliemaclellan) May 26, 2019

Hahaha Tracer, if *you* think someone’s a twig....

indeed

Give it to Stewart for this gurn alone.

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/4dab3fe85ea10cd281a9b0e1cb06eeaacf5edcb5/0_0_2560_1536/master/2560.jpg?width=620&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=42c68e9854a135ee8a3f0c708a6bb6de

It beats Raab squashing his face against a pane of glass.

Surprised Raab hasn’t been caught licking windows.

I had literally never heard of Rory Stewart before about three days ago.

I had, in the context of someone complaining a few months ago about one of the worst modern Foreign Ministers being at 75% approval on a conhome survey while Rory Stewart, who mostly just keeps his head down* and gets on with his work, is at 17%.

*I'm aware that being good at your work as a Tory makes you a bad person, but that's not a differentiating attribute as a Leadership Contest contestant.

No-one, not even Rory Stewart, hopes that Rory Stewart happens as much as Eddie Redmayne does.

r stewart wears a permanent look of having just been startled awake from some kind of eggy hibernation sac

god that new yorker profile of stewart is fucking perfect, i could read it over and over again

It is good.

Just had my mother on the phone feeling sorry for Theresa May, but interrupting with Trumpy talking points when I was trying to outline the Windrush scandal as part of the explanation of why I did not feel sorry that she'd asked for. Then she asked about ‘that Boris guy’ (she thinks he’s ‘creepy looking’) and actually allowed me to run down all the shitty things he’s done. Then on to Brexit itself: ‘why can’t they just have another vote?’

*headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk*

Correction:
Marmite today, in the end better than more jam tomorrow.

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 26, 2019

Can't wait til this douche milkshake ducks himself

"Rory Stewart, who mostly just keeps his head down* and gets on with his work"

Not keeping his head down now is he?

xp Milkshake? Duck!

I promise I'll be done with Gove after this, but this monologue on the Scottish deserves to be seen. pic.twitter.com/PiAgabv3wg

— Chris Morris Bits (@chrismorrisbits) May 27, 2019

unsurprisingly he absolutely sucked at being young as well!

christ, in that thread there is something about young edge-lord Gove interviewing Alan Clark and during a conversation about Iraq suddenly displaying graphic pics of dead Kurdish chemical attack victims, including children straight to the fucking camera.

And laughing.

Now - if anyone is around and wants to talk - in Kew Gardens - for the next hour pic.twitter.com/E45A26Y5uR

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 28, 2019

Turn your location on, Gove!

TALK OR CHALLENGE ME U COWARD

I love Barking. Now moving up from McDonald’s to Costa - come and talk or challenge me pic.twitter.com/7XoCxuJl7G

— Rory Stewart (@RoryStewartUK) May 27, 2019

BRB going to buy a gauntlet

A photo with an innocent black punter he’s met on the street? He’s got my vote!

Let's be fair to the intrepid fellow: Ludo from The Last Samurai would have considered him as a surrogate dad for at least three seconds. He can speak fucking Pashto after all