Seizing back control: The ILX lol brexit is how we're all gonna die thread.

ppl say that but look

Sure lookit

Stop looking at his half arse

heaven is a

I wonder if the Downing Street lectern has a parody Twitter account yet.

yes i wasn't taking a shot at you suzy or even BNB really: just being a bit gawkerish abt the media culture of "insider knowledge" diverging from the content of public analysis. if the gossip so-called is accurate enough (as it seems to have been!) then there's really no good reason for BNB's news organisation not to be transmitting it to viewers in the form of accurate coverage. all of BNB's organisation's viewers deserve to being kept sane by this good news-gathering getting right out into the open, and not just being shared on an informal basis.

"Fuck knows, I'm past caring, it's like the Living Dead in here" would have made a great thread title in fairness.

not that i've been paying any attention to BNB's organisation's actual broadcast material -- maybe it's great! that's why i asked. (i bet it isn't that great though.)

The DUP’s deputy leader, Nigel Dodds, has hinted that the door is not closed on his party supporting Theresa May and her deal.

He confirmed that the party’s position was a “principled” one, centred on the union of the United Kingdom and the threat the backstop posed to that.

But, in a statement, he suggested the problems were not insurmountable, in the DUP’s view. He said:

In our recent discussions with the government good progress has been made on how domestic legislation would assist in ensuring the economic integrity of the UK as a whole and recognising Northern Ireland’s particular situation sharing a land border with the European Union.

We have encouraged the government to, as Dominic Raab has said [see 12.43pm], return to Brussels on these issues and not simply to accept the position of the European Union as being unalterable. The government must use the remaining time to deal with widely held concerns across the House of Commons.

Theresa May: À la recherche du ten per DUP

underselling it as a board description xp matt

I mean that seems reasonable until you read the part “as Dominic Raab has said”.

lol xp

fuck knows, I'm past caring, it's like the living dead in here: lol brexit is how we're all gonna… wait this doesn't really work

xp

haha ignore my strange claim above that the DUP's announcements aren't also manipulative garbage btw

So if No Deal happens, how quickly does the UK scramble back to the negotiating table, cap in hand? I don't think even the most Brexit ultra PM would be able to hold out for that long.

fuck it, give us a general election (which will result in a hung parliament for the banter)

L(OL)BI.

Mark, I did tell you who BNB was the other night at our pal’s book launch! The news broadcast in question hasn’t been captured by Tories, thankfully.

Irish PM says UK may not fully appreciate risk of no-deal Brexit
The Irish prime minister, Leo Varadkar, has that the UK does not realise a no-deal Brexit is still an option, and a growing possibility. In a statement just issued he said:

Ireland has been preparing intensively for a no-deal scenario. But no one should under-estimate the difficulties that a no-deal will present, for all of us, including the UK. It is not clear that the UK has fully understood that no-deal is not off the agenda. Rather, it’s a growing possibility.

He said it was up to the UK to decide what to do now. And he went on:

I believe we must be open to a long extension should the United Kingdom decide to fundamentally reconsider its approach to Brexit and put back on the table options previously ruled out. I believe that will result in a generous and understanding response from the 27.

does "preparing intensively" include plans for deploying border militias I wonder, pruriently

This will unfortunately be seen by the most swivel-eyed (who appear to have May's ear) as confirmation that the EU will blink first, or if that they don't blink then they definitely will do without all that they demand for a trade deal.

i couldnt possibly say silby

there’s only one person BNB can be surely

Well, I did drop a fairly massive and obvious GoT-referencing hint about an hour after I had the conversation in question :D

xxxp this is not how I parsed this statement at all - Leo could say anything & it would be interpreted by that crowd as justification

yes i know who it is -- since i don't watch that programme i have no way of saying whether they're good or bad in the way i was asking about. i'm guessing bad, they're all bad in that way (stephen bush is the least bad). this isn't really a matter of party bias, it's a matter of forgetting what your actual job as a news organisation is.

A mass of protestors ranging from British far-right activists through to Trump-voting Americans and French supporters of a ‘Frexit’ and others were among those who have been attending a Ukip event outside the House of Parliament “sponsored”, in the party’s words, by Tommy Robinson.

As supporters of the separate March to Leave event on Parliament Square assembled in front of a big screen, members of both crowds walked between it and the Ukip event, which was due to be addressed by the party leader Gerard Batten.

To cheers, a number of Loyalist marching bands made a loud entrance to Parliament Square shortly after 4.30pm.

“Brexit is a huge inspiration to us and we want France to follow,” said Rabia Ouchikhe, a French citizen from the island of Reunion who was gathered with others from France’s Eurosceptic UPR movement. She said that some 800 people had travelled from France.

Other speakers were due to include Robinson, whose real name in Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, as well as the YouTube figure Carol Benjamin.

Home-made placards and differing dress, ranging from yellow vests to military fatigues and polo shirts of the various football fan groups that have come together under the banner of the Football Lads Alliance, dotted the crowd.

Barbara Parish, a former nurse from Nottingham, was wearing a crown and the sash of the suffragettes, as well as placard tracing UK democracy from the Magna Carta to the universal suffrage and beyond. “Don’t let the EU and Parliament destroy it,” was her message.

The gathering was watched by attendees who had floated across from the other rally. They included Louise Peart, a former policewoman and NHS worker from Surrey, who described the parliamentary impasse as a “shambles”.

“We’re tired of getting tarnished as far-right or racist or the other. We’re just working middle class people who want democracy to be carried through,” she added.

Will the cabinet please stop posting these golden thread titles too late?

Normally mild-mannered backbencher: The cabinet are f***ed. They’re so sh**. They couldn’t sell a glass of water to a parched man in the desert. They’re dancing with the fairies you and I can’t see at the end of the garden

— Ross Hawkins (@rosschawkins) March 29, 2019

whelks in name only

"Yaxley-Lennon, whose fake name is Tommy Robinson"

^^^why not this ffs

Off to the pub shortly, good luck to UKIP and March for Brexit and the Football Lads Alliance in their inevitable internecine and hopefully tragic battle.

It you could try to ensure that there's none of yez left alive and standing in Westminster by 11pm, that would be grand.

The bants express keeps on rolling

Nigel Dodds tells me the UK should stay in the EU if that was only way to preserve NI’s place in UK. ‘I would stay in the European Union and remain rather than risk Northern Ireland’s position. That’s how strongly I feel about the union.’

— Nicholas Watt (@nicholaswatt) March 29, 2019

https://twitter.com/faisalislam/status/11116739231024947

"a French citizen from the island of Reunion"

🤔

This delegation of ministers in Downing Street is urging the PM to say no to a softer Brexit and to go for No Deal Brexit

— Faisal Islam (@faisalislam) March 29, 2019

Speaker points at Parliament and says, "You have betrayed the soldiers who have fought for your country. Shame on you!"

No, nothing fashy about this demo at all. pic.twitter.com/z4vz7KaBYO

— Greggs Truther (@invisibleste) March 29, 2019

Oh, does he mean the soldiers who fought in Europe to ensure people would never have to fight a Europe-wide war ever again? Fuck off, gammons.

racism's a helluva drug

loyalists, kippers, football lads alliance. basically the worst dregs of humanity in one place.

It was really grim tbh. All of the above plus a smattering of upper-class twits of the worst sort

Some of these guys are walking through the train I’m in rn looking for seats, pray for me pls

I passed some of these demonstrators a while back - younger ones 100% edgelord types and more middle class than me, older ones absolutely nailed on golf Nazis. Thankfully I didn’t encounter any of the loyalists.

So...a stranger comes up to me on the train today + asks “Mr Umunna,what are your favourite garage tracks from back in the day?”
My answer: “Saved my life” by Todd Edwards & “The Energy” by Astro Trax.
A fellow #PeoplesVote fan reminding us there’s life beyond the Brexit chaos!

— Chuka Umunna (@ChukaUmunna) March 29, 2019

v pleased by the replies

may election is it

I met CEO Mick Davis & other senior colleagues this week.
I agreed to cease public comment re cases of Islamophobia for one month to allow @Conservatives to suggest a new & comprehensive approach to tackling this scourge within our ranks
For now the #DailyDetox is suspended! ✌️

— Sayeeda Warsi (@SayeedaWarsi) March 29, 2019

sounds like somebody's weighing a clout, testing its heft, in preparation for some castin'

Lol that is the Toriest thing ever. All gripes set aside, no matter how serious or awful, for the good of the party.

Chuka Umunna also defected from UK garage for "soulful house", when the MCs started to get involved, and that is all you need to know about him imho

— Dan Hancox (@danhancox) February 18, 2019

Am listening to Scott walker but the TV's on and, well, fuck those ukip flags.

chuka choosing today of all days to shitpost about uk garage is... just remarkable

what a colossal twat

it's the 29th, did ye get this sorted yet

I prefer the honorable Javid Khan.