US Politics December 2018: ~very legal and very cool~

ALL WOR K ANDNO PLAY MAKEs AMERICA A DULL COUNTRY . MAGA

just a phonebook-sized document full of jackie treehorn doodles

(Careful, even oblique references to wiener doodles could get u excommunicated from thraed.)

no i mean tasteful pencil renderings of my father ben gazzara in character as jackie treehorn

i know hillary's guilty but what am i?

a tax return!

isn't The Witch Hunt Report a Judy Blume book?

from the author of bunnicula and howliday inn

the first sentence was "The president's income tax returns were too complex for Americans to understand, alas" iirc

the first sentence was "The president's income tax returns were too complex for Americans to understand, alas SAD!" iirc

― reggie (qualmsley), Friday, December 7, 2018 11:20 AM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i had tiffany. ivanka don jr eric tiffany.

oh i guess barron counts

they wrote 87 pages about what, exactly

Hillary prison fanfic iirc

He's mistaken.

They printed out the itunes agreement for Trump to sign. Rudy insists they need to mail it to Apple to "prevent them from tracking you". He's the cyber security expert and he won't hear otherwise, dammit.

https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/07/politics/robert-mueller-john-kelly-obstruction-investigation/index.html

Kelly is widely expected to leave his position in the coming days and is no longer on speaking terms with President Donald Trump

I like how this makes it sound like some sort of petty family dispute over not passing grandpa the gravy boat at Thanksgiving or something

I've stopped speaking to Trump as well. I mean, fuck that guy, he doesn't listen, anyway. I don't even think he knows when my birthday is, even though I know his and bought him something cool, too.

(It was a custom McDonald's loyalty club card that only works on McRibs and Shamrock Shakes, isn't that awesome?)

wait, he's talking about hillary, right? right???

On that day...the deaf shall hear the words of a scroll & out of gloom & darkness the eyes of the blind shall see. For the tyrant shall be no more, the scoffer shall cease to be; All who are ready for evil shall be cut off...

Isaiah 29: 18-20

— Marco Rubio (@marcorubio) December 7, 2018

marco rubio is such a weirdo

It's amazing how many people accept positions in this administration thinking that they will succeed at influencing Trump to be less volatile and ignorant, like Kelly, or else manipulate him into following their own evil agenda, like Bolton. Then Trump proceeds to be just as volatile, ignorant and intractable as ever before. The "successful" ones are like Sarah Huckabee-Sanders and Kellyanne Conway, who have no ideas of their own and are content to act as obedient minions to Satan.

influencing Trump to be less volatile and ignorant, like Kelly,

this was the line on Kelly, pre-trump, but i think he's shown himself to be just another asshole. there was some recent thing about the long and agonizing process to get trump to answer the mueller questions. i remember reading that "it should have taken a couple days, but it took 3 weeks" or something like that. and at one point it said that the mueller-answering session was ruined because Kelly barged into the room to give an update on the CARAVAN

That's wonderful!

"it should have taken a couple days, but it took 3 weeks"

this was Giuliani that said that

imagine a white house team staffed with nothing but Barry Zuckerkorns

Do we even have to imagine that, really?

well i like to imagine that

*hmph*

I just mean that the actual WH is like that time Malkovich took the portal into his own head except everyone is saying 'Zuckercorn Zuckercorn Zuckercorn'. No imagination required!

AKA imagine the WH were a playpen. I will grant you that there are walls instead of bars, but otherwise...

one of the more painful things i am dealing with is that if there was a 24/7 live feed of the trump oval office, i would probably watch it all the time. i mean years later, after the apocalypse. not as a way of hearing oval office secrets as they happen, but just as pure political entertainment. i am sick

i like to watch important people mess up

watch this and sigh for simpler times

https://ournixon.com/

So the manafort report is coming out today right

By midnight. Cohen one is due at 5pm.

What a time to be alive:

Mike Pompeo is doing a great job, I am very proud of him. His predecessor, Rex Tillerson, didn’t have the mental capacity needed. He was dumb as a rock and I couldn’t get rid of him fast enough. He was lazy as hell. Now it is a whole new ballgame, great spirit at State!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

ahahahaha

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPRx4w_b51g

its true Trump literally waited an entire year for Rex to take a dump so he could fire him

Getting back at Rex for calling him "a moron". And proving it at the same time.

that's one of my favorite trump tweets

Here's what set him off (open in private/incognito):

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2018/12/07/rex-tillerson-trump-undisciplined-doesnt-like-read-tries-do-illegal-things/

prison-bound, mueller time,
sweet putin, whisper in my ear
you're a uranium one, and hillary is free so
lock her up, solitary, good bye!

I have noticed that Junior here has a habit of posting nonsense about me whenever the Mueller investigation heats up.

Please, keep it coming Jr - it’s definitely a “very, very large brain” idea to troll a member of a body that will have subpoena power in a month.

Have fun! https://t.co/oQ6MsdJYCk

— Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@Ocasio2018) December 7, 2018

Michael Cohen (who I've never even met) was a total Loser whose television show called The Apprentice was garbage, and he had to have someone else write his book (Art of the Deal). He looks like a sack of orange crap and he's the worst 'president' America has ever had. Better off without him!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

I understand people's delight in seeing AOC mock Shithead Junior, but in the end I fear it all just becomes noise.

the trick is to do it well enough that it rises slightly above the noise and is widely noticed. trump, otoh, is the Phil Spector of noise.

XPS Second tweet brings up Cohen's toadstool penis.

BTW, I was at Fry's the other day and they had a full dumpbin of Toad pillows (shaped like his head and hat) and ohhhhhh the mis-timing!

I understand people's delight in seeing AOC mock Shithead Junior, but in the end I fear it all just becomes noise.

Nothing I've ever seen you post has indicated that you understand delight, joy, pleasure, happiness...

such is the life of a mets fan

very untrue, unperson, you must've missed about 1200 posts