Hinglish/Indian English C/D, S/D

recently came across this fascinating forum http://indusladies.com/community/find-new/26555920/posts

this thread includes the wonderful phrase: "As long as he behaves decent, ignore; it is a harmless pass time."

I am enjoying the cultural flavor of some of the jokes posted there (especially by user ksuji), and the IE usages definitely add to it.

:

Mrs. & Mr. Ramaswamy went to US on a six-month trip -- your guess is correct, their daughter was carrying.
On a pleasant morning, Mr. Ramaswamy was watching the TV where a live show of sending a satellite was being telecast from NASA. The countdown began ,
10, 9, 8, 7,6,5,4, 3,2,1,0.......
The rocket was stationary, motionless , quiet, retaining its place.
Nothing happened.
All the scientists and other staff were very much worried, they had a morose , grim face . They all checked every part inch by inch, cm by cm.Everything was alright.
They tried to start.
A second countdown.
NOTHING HAPPENED.

A final check : mm by mm.
A final countdown.
It was STATIC.
They were not weeping , that is all.
So many millions of $ should go into a waste? All the countries are watching.
Time passed and passed.

The higher ups , chairman,ministers, President and all were very much worried.
Mr. Ramaswamy made a call to the space center and asked whether he could give a humble suggestion.
From the President, Ministers, Chief of the Centre to the last staff came running to the video conference. When they had lost hope they were prepared to hear the suggestion of even a child. The President immediately announced ,if the suggestion would work , Mr.Ramaswamy would be rewarded with a Big house,a Mercedes car,free education up to any level for his children and grandchildren, a good amount of pension and what not.
Mr.Ramaswamy refused the rewards , if any, but was told that once announced it is confirmed.
Within the next half an hour he was taken to the Space Center by a helicopter where he was given a warm welcome. A large number of people gathered around him waiting for the move of his lips. All of them were prepared to do whatever he ordered.
Ramaswamy asked them to turn the rocket 45° to the left and then 45° to the right and then set it aright.
They did so.
He then asked them to make the countdown .
They also did so.
OH!!!!! TO THE WONDER AND ASTONISHMENT OF EVERYONE THE ROCKET FLEW PIERCING THE AIR, ATMOSPHERE AND THE SKY.
They were all amazed.
People around lifted Ramaswamy and shouted "Hip Hip Hurray".
They exchanged ##s (what is the substitute of laddu in USA ?) among each other . Mr.Ramaswamy became a genius,honorable and dignified person to all of them. Ramaswamy was then taken outside the cordoned limit where all media persons were waiting for him for an interview.
The media men asked him how he sensed the fault and found the right solution for it.
Mr.Ramaswamy said," Whenever my scooter strikes on the way I am used to turn it about 45° this side and that side, and then kick,it will start immediately".
(All the above is only for the purpose of joke ; it is all read somewhere, so many years back --if not allowed pl. remove this thread).
----------------------------------------------
PS: He was taken back to his house with due honour and the rewards were not withdrawn. Nowadays some corporates are seeking his help for solving their problems.

Mrs. Soandso was fat , very fat , very very fat. As advised by the doctor she was in dire necessity to reduce her weight.
She saw an advertisement which claimed to reduce her weight by FIFTY kilograms in a month. She paid a large amount and bought the tablets . After taking a few tablets some allergy developed. As per doctor's advice she discontinued taking tablets . The money back guarantee of the company is still in the air.
Her doctor advised her that walking is the only best solution .
Instead of walking two kilometers a day , (as the doctor said " say, from your house to the temple "),she walked about two hundred metres a day by going through shortcut ; sometimes she would get lift in some two-wheeler.
Her doctor advised her to take two chapatis in the nights . She was very obedient to the doctor and sincerely ADDED two, sometimes three or four , ghee spread chapatis to her supper,daily.
Mrs.Soandso was like a child .
(அவங்களுக்கு குழந்தை உள்ளம்).
Whenever she bought cakes or chocolates for her children there would be a share for her too.
Her weight didn't reduce , instead increased.
She bought a hot belt (like a hot plate )--
Again only burns and allergies.
At last as advised by the lady in the next house she joined horse riding.
There was an excellent result :
THE WEIGHT WAS REDUCED BY TWENTY KILOGRAMS WITHIN ONE MONTH --(weight
of the horse ).

haha, love those

I am recognizing this type. It pulls my nerve.

I saw L. Subramaniam at the Great India Festival in front of City Hall last night and was reminded of this thread: https://imgur.com/a/JvHkRpj

Actually, if you can see this, I might delete the Imgur post: https://photos.app.goo.gl/qRhNf9nNNUtPitBP6

I can see it only. Kindly do the needful

Dr. Subramaniam is a real maestro.

Delectable

(Taking a look at the new Duolingo Hindi course. I tried to learn Hindi several years ago. I seemed to get a basic grasp- the grammar is Indo-European and doesn't seem so complicated, and I spent a little time working on the writing system- but I actually got a little discouraged in that it is not the home language for as many as you might think and it seems to almost irritate some people when you try to learn it.

Learning a language should not give botheration for anyone. Thinking that Hindi is the native tongue for all or even most Indians, or that it is the national language = a grave mishap

I think I saw that only 41% of India’s population are considered native Hindi speakers and “only” 54% say they can speak it as a first or second language.

https://www.thehindu.com/news/national/tamil-nadu/why-is-tamil-nadu-opposed-to-imposition-of-hindi/article18401295.ece

Also worth remembering that Modern Standard Hindi isn’t going to be the form spoken everywhere.

The above newspaper is a first class example of Indian English writing btw.

Interesting, thanks. Yes, I remarked upon the exemplary nature of the prose.

I had another tangentially related question. There are certain words that come from Arabic or Persian, say, that seem to also appear in Hindi and Turkish, for example, which I always assume got passed around by some empire, be it Ottoman, Mughal, Safavid or other, but of course could have been transmitted by some other route. Curious if such words made into other languages on the subcontinent, although the only one I can think of right now is kitap or kitab, meaning "book."

Especially " even though not many are optimistic of the ability of the issue to catapult any political formation to capture power. " Also, I might have to start using "chutney on the leaf."

The term ‘hindi’ itself is of Persian origin iirc.

There’s a tonne of them - sabzhi, naraanji, etc, some of which are the same in, for example, Gujarati and Bangla, some of which are different.

I say this confidently like I can read Hindi, rather than read a menu, but for the avoidance of doubt, I absolutely can’t.

Yes, the word “Hindi” is from Persian. I believe the original fruit the word “naraanji” was used for is different from an orange.

To the efforts to make Hindi compulsory, Annadurai replied with a ridicule. 'If we had to accept the principle of numerical superiority while selecting our national bird, the choice would have fallen not on the peacock but on the common crow.' 

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a9/Phrase_sanskrit.png

All peacocks to me.

What an HTML nonsense!

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a9/Phrase_sanskrit.png

I hope you are all mugging and by-hearting this thread, as there will soon be a test.

I thought about "by-hearting" the other day.

Really? Were you by any chance by-hearting Villa-Lobos’s Prelude No. 1?

http://imgur.com/kMDHWaxl.png

Just begun watching 2010 TV series Powder on Netflix; it is subtitled in IE.

http://indusladies.com/community/threads/better-to-be-a-potato-or-an-egg.307442/
^^Kindly revert back with your suggestions below

I recognize that this is a text based thread but this guy is just great:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3M7v3NGNyw

A+

Got some false positives because the Tagalog word for no is "Hindi," I believe.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpiH0u-s_pQ

Mindblowing!

Kikkoman who?

PANKAJ JAISWAL 3 weeks ago

Danger for helth

(In case you’re interested: The Flashy Crawl on Biryani Carts, Convenience Stores, etc.)

My new puppy is exceptionally frightful, I cannot bring her even to the public park lest she take fear.

http://bollywoodhelpline.com/editor-39-s-pick/bollywood/a-tale-of-forbidden-love-guru-dutt-waheeda-rehman/9266
https://www.thebridalbox.com/articles/guru-dutt-and-waheeda-rehman-wedding_0056750/

Sorry, have recently become interested in Guru Dutt. He is an ace director.

https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g608474-d10833440-Reviews-A_1_Chikki-Lonavala_Pune_District_Maharashtra.html

One of the many things for which lonavala is famous for . CHIKKI's. There are a variant types of chikkis including all nuts kind. Try to carry plenty of chikki gifts to friends and family . No one would want to resist a good snack.

https://www.mouthshut.com/product-reviews/A1-Chikki-Lonavala-reviews-925739577

A1 chikki wala is a very famous chikki center at Lonawala. As we all know Lonawala is a hill station famous for Chikki and hence we always get it from there. Though we get some famous chikki brands now in mumbai as well but Lonawala is specially a place where people can get chikki’s for gifting too.

Convent-educated clean-shaven wheatish boy seeks Eastern Economy Edition no issue caste no bar

I started reading Rohinton Mistry's A Fine Balance, which both seems good so far and also contains plenty of quality IE in the dialogue.

I've just learned that in Kerala, your trendy pair of glares are instead called "cooling glasses."

https://i.imgur.com/ZHOhpu0.png

Ha, didn't realize that was Kerala-specific.

A+

I saw some hits for “cooling glasses for mens.” Is that “mens” IA or just a typo?

Just came across this in a completely different context. The IA element is kind of light but I want to read more from this guy: https://www.thehindu.com/books/know-your-english/know-your-english-meaning-of-pancake-people/article2750006.ece

Extra points given for the basic fact-checking/ continuity/proofreading error in the first paragraph.

I think mens is only not a typo when it's in corpore sano.