Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

feeling this

Another date today. Don't say 'if this goes well, we could go do X' in the first five minutes for fuck's sake! (Him, not me).

On the upside my next and probably final date has alerted me to this, which at least means he'll have a sense of humour if it all goes pear-shaped.

here's hoping X was philately or Hornby trainset painting or something

X was going to Baltimore, which sent me into a hasty explanation of how much I like exploring cities ON MY OWN

wow! within 5 minutes too! way to blow your load

NB, I do live only 40 mins from Baltimore, so it's not so bad, but yeah.

lol "I will explore my local city ALONE, thanks"

dude should have been all Euro capital on you

I'm the only saddo still on OKCupid, aren't I?...
― ljubljana, Thursday, May 21, 2009 6:14 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark

I'm on okcupid but every time I use the browse feature it's the same old girls in my area that I don't want to date.
I haven't had any luck on dating sites for over 25 years now.

I had a marathon 'match' session recently and I really do think I've met the only two guys I was interested in meeting (of those that that 'match' is finding for me in the top, you know, ahemthreehundred or so), with a third later this week. And that's in DC! I really fancy the third based on his picture so I'm kind of stupidly optimistic about it.

captain lorax you have not been using dating sites for more than 25 years

NB, I am now sending stupid messages to the third guy in order to fuck things up in advance. Fucking things up when really interested must be hard-wired in.

Am yet to gauge quite how immersive this website can be, but it seems to contain multitudes of wasted time

multitudes of time

like 'a myriad of options'. That drives me up the wall.

you know, you don't have to bite the apple ljubljana. you could set an example for women everywhere (because obviously they are all sinful snake listening apple biters)

whaaa

Eh? (I'll consider it, but I'll have to understand it first).

you don't have to fuck things up

Oh. Well, I'll try not to. But it's amazing how your instincts, which seem not to be fucked up at the time, drive you to write very convoluted things in the pursuit of a good impression.

thank you

i fuck things up too

Well, that was... better than the other two dates... a bit trying-too-hard-talking-too-much (him), nodding, smiling (me)

I went on a OKC date tonight. At some point in the evening, the three dudes next to us at the bar engaged us in a conversation, which started out okay. But at some point one of them started going on and on about Freud, so my date ripped into him to the point that the three dudes left the bar in a huff. It was very strange, and honestly I was pretty impressed.

3 ILXors going on dates on the same day was evidently too much for the server facility

you too Louis? Spill all, though Freud-pusher-bashing is going to be hard to beat.

aw i just met up with a cute and extremely open american chick (born within 2 weeks of me) and wandered round london's great parks for about 4 hours, was swell :)

we had much to talk about, and talk we duly did

Oh that's luuuuuuuurvely! Seeing her again?

of course! she has big plans for me. possibly involving her male friends. lol but seriously, yeah! it's only taken us a week to become good friends...and there's obvious mutual attraction too. might not be romance of the century, but it's definitely not a prospective fuckbuddy thing either...we're tight.

tight Adj. 1. To be frugal or not generous. {Informal}
2. Drunk. {Informal}

i.e. a good friendship, with maybe a bit of sex (rather than the other way around), which might or might not develop into stronger things, but which won't prevent either of us dating/seeing others

anyway i find the best thing is not to think or talk about it too much but just to enjoy it as it comes, which is what i shall now do :)

i mean, on a final note, the golden A+ number one rule to how well these things go is obviously communication, conversational compatibility, and meeting someone awesome and on-yer-wavelength for the day is worth ten thousand empty shags

if you end up shagging* them then like haha yeah that's pretty much why i joined this website

*if they're REALLY, like, whoa-where-have-you-been-all-my-life, upgrade to dating, but hey you're only young once

My date just asked to be my friend on Facebook and I said no. No damn way I'm having my friends see potentially cringemaking wall posts. But he seemed ok about it. I think he just chalked it up to my being an uptight Britisher. So, that's how hey, whoo 'you're only young once' I am about OKC.

Erm, mind you I'm not young. I didn't think about that.

you're only young once, but it can be a long once if you want it to be :P

good luck with him, anyway. that's if you want luck.

fwiw re: my date, i do want to clarify that i would see her again, gladly, even if it was established that sex/a relationship would not be on the cards, which is how it should be with good matches :)

also, and this time really finally, she messaged me first ;)

She gets major bonus points for that. I know because I got them for messaging my date ;-)

are you seeing him again?

Prooooooooooobably

taking it slowly, eh? well gooooooood luck!

did you see her again Louis? Went on a second date with mine and decided I really like him but he is claiming overwork/no time to connect. I think I believe him but hell, I should be irresistible surely and damn the consequences.

aw yeah, where are this man's priorities?

I did see her again, yeah! Met her and her gay friends for an evening of drinking games and revelry, which was great fun, by the time we got to a club she decided she was too drunk to go in so I walked her home, whereupon she vommed and passed out in the bathroom :-/ but it was all cool and cordial the next day! I doubt anything sexual/romantic will happen there.

Last week I met up with someone else, in Oxford (so I could tie it in with meeting a heapload of old friends), and that went extremely well. She was pretty much entirely on my wavelength, loads of "oh me too!" moments. Discovered after two days that she wasn't up for a relationship as such because she'd only recently broken up (and was 'finding herself'), and indeed she quit OKC immediately afterwards, but we've stayed in touch, and it's at least, I'd hope, a friendship.

Pity about your prospective bloke L. I think you should devise some plan of action! Make a surprise visit or something! Without making it look too desperate obv.

that's nice that the 'friends, activity partners' choices can actually function as such! I think my plan of action is just to go quiet on email and see what happens....

Well, 'Activity Partners' I take to mean 'bandmates' or 'sporting opponents' or somesuch. The first of my two liaisons probably counted as a friend thing, the second as a very short-term date which blurred both friendship and activity partner lines. I guess she introduced me to The Wire, that must count for something.

Your plan is possibly for the best. But be wary of trying to tease him out! He may need a bit more convincing.

Yeah, but we exchange emails several times a day - I'm running out of witty responses to convince him with. A third date and only a third date will tell him whether he's interested or not, and he cancelled the one we had set up due to overwork, so ball is in his court... and I am no player by The Rules, but still...

Met her and her gay friends

Looks like someone is being set up!

score
Happy! but cautious

bosh

knew it'd work out for ya

:-(
It is like dating the plot of a Woody Allen movie.

I suspect this is a regular hazard on OKC.