Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating?

think it's the current TSB ads - "some banks only contact you when they're trying to sell something". Good! You're not my fucking mates you arseholes

those oat milk ads have infested new york city now and stand in stark contrast to the other genre of new york city subway ads which is "your life in this city is a psychically exhausting trauma parade and this product might slightly help"

excuse me, it's oat drink

more brewdog:

https://www.itsnicethat.com/news/brewdog-pink-ipa-beer-for-girls-advertising-060318

“It’s time to throw a Molotov cocktail through the glass ceiling,”

jesus fucking christ

that'll end well

that metaphor sounds like it would results in some serious burns/lacerations

Pls do not throw a molotov cocktail at a ceiling

no it will go through the ceiling because it is glass and at that point the laws of gravity will be broken also

oh what a feeling
molotoving on the ceiling

what could be more punk
than a molotov dunk?

not gonna lie, i've always fancied having a go at lobbing a molotov cocktail

there's a brewdog pub five minutes' walk from where i am now, maybe i should use it for target practice when i nip out for lunch

beers not for girls, its not for guys- its for after work wankers who go round asking everyone of they have cocaine

Nuclear war = buy more pies

https://i.imgur.com/G83jkm3.jpg

pretty sure i saw charlie bigham's fish pie at the basingstoke festival a few years back?

https://www.britainrunsonrail.co.uk/fares?utm_source=nationalrail.co.uk&utm_medium=Carousel&utm_campaign=fares

https://i.imgur.com/b0YwwE0.jpg

ugh; I'd assume that's supposed to be ironic given recent circs of the company (or the ordinary) but perhaps not.

💦

I hate, hate, hate it the most when it's making a claim about what the company is like to work for. 'Cute and happy' does not fit in with the reality of what any job is like, even if the job is looking after the puppy in a shop that sells fairies and glitter. Imagine the mental stress involved in making 'cute and happy!' fit in with getting a bollocking off a boss for being below target and they're wrong but you need the money.

^ word. Know someone who briefly worked in a 'cat cafe' and they were cunts

not sure where to put this arsehole, maybe need a new thread idk

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/536cd1016e0758ddcb18d70c049239c11b6aed80/717_694_4619_2771/master/4619.jpg?width=1920&quality=85&auto=format&usm=12&fit=max&s=3732ed123a70a6e941c06d595dc0ccbd

English Eccentrics that are complete cunts thread.

yeah something like that, a non-commercial equivalent of this thread basically

we've got this tiresome old bigot called Jake Mangel Wurzel, he has a bath mounted on top of his car, a dog called Manhole, wears wellington/pyjama combos. I always say ignore a vulgar attention seeker and they will get bored, but this fucker never gets bored.

i always say everybody needs some attention but not this way, not this way

I have a lot of time for autism spectrum mavericks, but anyone who could be bothered with such a maintained charade of "eccentricity" could only be a 100% neurotypical imo.

https://preview.ibb.co/jOjfZz/20180919_001421.jpg

Ha, I was just watching Limmy's Dee Dee sketch where he's in the kitchen and imagining the inner life of his t-shirt, this one sounds a bit less aggressive though.

I'm gonnae gi' its face a wee dunt wi' the iron. Show it who's boss.

lets to go back to the 70's and get a fucking washboard or twin tub, just so you can wear high maintenance fabrics. that sounds like fun.

From: Alex at Morning Brew <a✧✧✧@morningb✧✧✧.c✧✧>
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Wasn't there actually a terrible roller-coaster accident in this country not that long ago? I hope they've got their CRM/legal team in order.

I was going to say, I remember reading about people being seriously injured and a girl who had her leg amputated. Not cool.

Yeah, they can't even do twee bollocks right. Correct form would be "catastrophic knitting accident" or the like

when knitters die, do they pass through the purly gates?

Nothing says welcome back like "I've just been imagining your grisly death"

third cousin of mine put a needle straight through his own spleen a week back. last words to his wife were 'wear the scarf for me'

not sure this belongs here but I have two bugbears right now with social media adversiting:

1) announcements of local shows by performers are always phrased as: "San Francisco, we can't wait to see you!" Fuck off, I don't believe for a second anyone in the Damned thinks this.
2) I think this shit started with that stupid Omaze place but the photos of celebrities holding white signs with words written on them....drives me up the fucking wall.

wait, white signs w/words like in the Bob Dylan "Subterranean Homesick Blues" movie ... or something else?

it's 'cause some charities only get five minutes every six months with their celeb.

so they take a picture of them holding up a white piece of card and add the copy later

Here are the 'sales pitches' for all four of HSBC's adventures in city-branding: for Birmingham, Leeds, Manchester and London pic.twitter.com/rkA9r72tQH

— dan hancox (@danhancox) January 18, 2019

deeply fucking irritating? ✅

What point are the Hong Kong and Shanghai Bank trying to make there?

Argh, the Manchester one is "PM candidate visits McDonalds" level cringe.

Also, obvs more people know the song than the play, but "Look Back in Anger" is quoting John Osborne, who's from... Fulham

claim that Leeds invented fish and chips seems very questionable afaict

straight out of Harry Ramsden's bullshit origin story I'm guessing

actually, seeing the ayoade tv advert again, those echo the narration on those pretty closely.

my mum gave us some teething biscuits for our daughter from a company called BICKIEPEGS and occasionally i find the unbearably twee word BICKIEPEGS swimming unbidden into my consciousness and it makes me furious

even worse my daughter has a little drinking cup from BICKIEPEGS called the DOIDY CUP and i am occasionally haunted by the phrase ‘the DOIDY CUP from BICKIEPEGS’ which might be the worst string of syllables i’ve ever heard

lol

haha OTM
I quite like saying Doidy cup though

Everything to do with babies is vomit-inducing. My son's bunny is branded a 'sleepytot' and there's all sorts of 'babba wuv' type things. There is also a kids' clothing brand called Polarn O. Pyret which I can never ever remember the name of (spent 5 mins googling it just now) and constantly call it Porno for Pirates instead