Star Wars 8 shit talk

all yr questions answered

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kylo-ren-shirtless-last-jedi_us_5a343a2ce4b040881bea8a2f

lol @ ppl needing a reason. that’s adorable

man, the famous Jedi texts that are in none of the 13 hours of Jedi-centric Star Wars films we have, it was so sad to see Luke burn those! and the Tree! dude Darth Vader never shut up about that Jedi Tree.

Jedi Tree was in the background in some of the council scenes of the prequels iirc, along with his partner Master Switch

Loved Luke and Yoda chilling in front of the big bonfire.

the rich on the casino planet make their money by selling women to the first order

Nitpick here, but was it women or weapons? I was under the impression it was weapons.

Ok, who wants the Good Shit?

http://thefederalist.com/2017/12/18/last-jedi-worst-star-wars-movie-ever/

A sampling:

The plot is further degraded by its pointed failure to follow up on the various story points set up by its predecessor, the wonderful “Force Awakens.” One of the best was the mystery of Rey’s parentage, which seemed to promise an exploration of the Jedi’s typically convoluted bloodlines. We discover, however, in a belated revelation, that her parents were “nobodies” completely unconnected to anything remotely interesting

lol that's trolling right? i mean the movie has problems but at a skim most of the claims there are laughable or designed to reveal the reviewer as a complete clod. "objectively bad," ha.

the rich on the casino planet make their money by selling women to the first order

Nitpick here, but was it women or weapons? I was under the impression it was weapons.

― Johnny Fever, Monday, December 18, 2017 7:14 PM (thirteen minutes ago)

oh, i heard women. might have been weapons

Bruneau p impressive how you manage to become tedious in new and inventive ways each week

Johnny was right - it's "weapons"

lol The Federalist reviewing Star Wars in between their Trump fellatio

Found it! Here’s Armond!

http://www.nationalreview.com/article/454666/last-jedi-shape-water-juvenile-political-fantasies

He didn’t like Del Toro’s latest either.

i loved Laura Dern's explosive finale visually even though it meant Star Wars is now ripping off Starcrash (except w dumber heroes).

there's a petition making the rounds for disney to "remove episode VIII from the canon" and honestly when will these fuckin nerds go extinct pls

http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/a-list-of-some-of-the-times-the-last-jedi-told-the-olde-1821396631

I was seriously tired of all of the acrobatics done to make everything conform to a formula with deep reverence for the most superficial details that the franchise had become. The best shit in the original trilogy was the swamp frog man hitting the main character with a stick and telling him not to rely on his assumptions, and there was plenty of that in this one

Has anybody commented that it’s really strange that Leia would spend so much resources and effort in TFA to find Luke, only for him to be hidden out.. in a cabin next to a famous Jedi Tree

It’d be cooler if this movie wasnt 5 hours long.

xpost It was an unmapped island that from space looked like mere ocean. they knew he was going to the original Jedi temple, but nobody actually knew where that was, just knew *of* it

like "famous" Jedi tree = I sincerely doubt most laypeople knew of it or much about it other than it existed

it was famous thousands or even tens of thousands of years ago as far as I could tell, not so much a tourist attraction these days

the jedi got really into having a hierarchy and all hung out in the galaxy’s capital planet where they could make rules about how to be a jedi and complain a lot, they were kind of bad at archeology

some of the hyper focus on logistical issues and "plot holes" makes me wonder how closely some of these fanboys watched the original trilogy, in which the definition of what you could do with the Force seemed to get expanded every movie, Yoda tells Luke not to abandon his training only to tell him a movie later that he doesn't need any more training when he comes back, Luke romantically kisses his sister, etc etc

like if there was ever a universe that really wasn't tightly plotted and contradicted itself at will, it's this one

Why did yoda burn down the tree but then i saw a lorebook later? I figured if yoda burned shit down everything was toast. Its hard not to cling to stuff if you arent serious about your lesson, yoda.

let the whiny laser sword man think he’s burning it all down, it’ll give him that kick in the ass he needs

lol at a magazine called The Federalist. Their horrible writers appear on FOX News and MSNBC with stylish haircuts and viewpoints straight out of Andrew Mellon's diaries.

Rey had already taken them prior to that moment. it didn't matter if they were really there or not, the burning was a symbolic of the destruction and "rebirth" of the Jedi. it's also Yoda saying "being a Jedi is about more than stupid artifacts and boring books", I guess dude isn't as into the dogma as once thought

yeah if you ever wanna see insanity, go to RealClearPolitics and just look at the TITLES of the Federalist articles.....

let the whiny laser sword man think he’s burning it all down, it’ll give him that kick in the ass he needs

― mh, Monday, December 18, 2017 8:42 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yes this

also maybe leading the whole galaxy into total multi-decade disaster has changed yoda's outlook on things

btw everybody who wants Kylo Ren to "turn" to the light needs to go find other movies to watch

I am embarrassed to admit how many times I've seen this already, let's just say I can pretty much recite the dialogue from memory now

Read that as "turn to the right"

there’s that yoda bit at the end of the prequels where he’s like “oh we fucked up majorly, I’m gonna go into hiding until we can sort this out”

if only Sanders had done that!

ba-zing!

weird relics in the basement, cool fortress, now a gun battle? maz kanata is the semi-retired indiana jones of star wars who was trying to run her own casablanca-style bar in semi-retirement

btw everybody who wants Kylo Ren to "turn" to the light needs to go find other movies to watch

― fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal), Monday, December 18, 2017 8:45 PM (eight minutes ago)

sort of feel like we can chill a little bit with the stanning, people can have different experiences of the same movie, want different things from it, etc. you're being a little obnoxious

there’s that yoda bit at the end of the prequels where he’s like “oh we fucked up majorly, I’m gonna go into hiding until we can sort this out”

― mh, Monday, December 18, 2017 8:48 PM (eleven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if only Sanders had done that!

― morning wood truancy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, December 18, 2017 8:51 PM (eight minutes ago)

someone get this guy on the star wars joke writing team!

also maybe leading the whole galaxy into total multi-decade disaster has changed yoda's outlook on things

― the pleather of pleather paul (Doctor Casino), Monday, December 18, 2017 8:44 PM (sixteen minutes ago)

yeah i got this feeling too

sort of feel like we can chill a little bit with the stanning, people can have different experiences of the same movie, want different things from it, etc. you're being a little obnoxious

― k3vin k., Monday, December 18, 2017 9:00 PM Bookmark Flag Post

yes we all know you're the cool SW 'outsider' guy

like r u familiar with ILE or

Didn't Luke actually say the words "laser sword" at some point? Made me jump. "Fightin' with the laser swords and robots in the star war"

he did. I took it as a statement of derision though apparently it upset some people cos sabers aren't literally laser swords.

sort of feel like we can chill a little bit with the stanning, people can have different experiences of the same movie, want different things from it, etc. you're being a little obnoxious

― k3vin k., Monday, December 18, 2017 9:00 PM Bookmark Flag Post

yes we all know you're the cool SW 'outsider' guy

― fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal), Monday, December 18, 2017 9:02 PM (fifty-five seconds ago)

i don't think i've really attempted to cultivate a persona vis a vis star wars, your need to go line by line and refute everything anyone didn't like about the movie is just lame!

yea i could give a shit thanks for stopping by tho

cool i look forward to your next 400 posts

can't say the same about yours sadly

bo jackson hyperdrive