Facebook neighborhood groups are the worst thing ever

i tell you hwat

welp, finally happened. think my neighborhood just got gentrified.

https://i.imgur.com/FTYxcIN.png

isn't "beard barber" redundant?

some person in the neighborhood took a picture of my license plate because i was driving like a maniac. she's totally going to put it on facebook or something.

i want to die so much

imo just get some badass bumper stickers

Or drive faster.

This remains my favorite thing

E---- P------·Edited 2h ago
To all those interested, here are photographs of the cottage. the rent is $1950.00 per month plus one months deposit.

C------ M--- 2h ago
Lovely... how much is the rent? Thank you 🙏

tbf, sometimes the original post does not have the price, and after people ask the op edits the original to include it.

True I think that's actually the case here, for some reason I didn't register "edited"

I hadn't logged into nextdoor for months but did so the other day to make sure a cat I saw near my place wasn't lost. At some point in the last year it's hit the critical mass to become a nightmare hellscape of people making the same post over and over (do you know of a good leaf removal service?) and weird opinions about what the police should and should not do, most of which are insanely bad.

since i'm also signed up for my hometown nextdoor i get a double dose and it's amazing how little difference there is between posts on Los Angeles nextdoor and posts on rural IL nextdoor.

https://i.imgur.com/c8ORVSM.png

I'm probably the only one who thinks two people named Amber and Frazier are talking about Fire Wood.

thinks it's funny.

To the Man with 8 Eight Vehicles on Oakland and Harrison Aves
One of our neighbors has eight different vehicles parked on Oakland and Harrison Ave. They include vans, older cars and motorcycles.

I've had my catalytic converter stolen ($1400), back window smashed and have had the contents of the car gone through 4 or 5 times. In each instance it was parked closer to the 580 than I would have liked to do because this guy with 8 vehicles takes up all the spaces in front of my house.

I know who it is and where he lives. He is also a registered sex offender and pedophile. As far as I know he has paid his debt to society for his crimes, but he's screwing the rest of us over with his vehicles.

If you, the subject of this post, are here, please stop hoarding the extremely limited parking spaces in our neighborhood. Rent a garage. If the individual isn't here and/or not open to finding a compromise, I will be taking action to correct the situation whatever that means.

I just want to park my truck without it being destroyed!

parking is a hot topic on nextdoor right now

someone has created a poll, "Should the city require residential parking permits?" which I unwittingly voted in, causing me to get subscribed to the thread. I don't want to go back to unsubscribe because I know the comments would just make me insane, so I'm just quickly swiping email messages away before I read them

I am sure I'm going to feel like looking at it soon to laugh in glee at the chaos, though

fwiw there's no way my city is large enough or congested enough to need such permits, it's just a person on a short stretch of road angry that people have the nerve to park (badly) on the street

You have arguments over whether your town needs parking permits. My neighborhood argues about whether or not we should be allowed to park in the front yard.

imo if you allow yard parking the street is less congested, win-win

does pedophile and/or registered sex offender status come into play in these parking arguments?

While I am in favor of being kind to opossums, I must take issue with "beautiful". I believe them to be the most ugly thing that God ever created. I do feel a great deal of… See more

Just spotted two iguanas in the alley off Harvey. Is this normal?

I live in the East Columbia area near the spot where a man shot off one of his fingers last year in a gun fight. Tonight as I was having my X-Mas box of wine in the deck I spotted two lizard like beasts wrestling over what appeared to be a Purina Dog Food bag. I was at a loss thinking that this could be a hallucination but my dog saw them as well and he had less wine than me

An astronaut on the ISS recently took a photo of our metro, and boy, let me tell you, we are fucking famous now.

J** B********

Max and Leo are 11 months old, neutered, micro-chipped, and completely up to date with their shots. We've tried for 9 months to train our 4 year old dog to stop bothering them but we haven't had any success. We just want to find them a home with kind and caring owners, where they'll have a peaceful life. Please send a PM if you are interested.

B***** U***

Sorry the dog didn't learn to get along with them. I left my husband because his dog wouldn't leave my cat alone. I hope you can find them a wonderful forever home.

B***** U*** OTM

Someone reported Buddy the Cat missing. This neighbor posted this to say that she had found him:

https://i.imgur.com/7X9J9VV.jpg

"Recently we've gotten feedback from our community that Facebook neighborhood groups are the worst thing ever – so you can expect to see much more of them in the coming months"

I miss the ad hoc neighborhood groups that'd spring up and grow organically

and by organically, I mean some of them were so bad that friends would tell me things like "you have to join 'Townname People', it's got the most fucked up stuff"

so you end up with a conspicuous 10% of the group not actually from there, just there for the ride

on investigation, it appears there is now a second "Townname People - No Moderators" group set up in protest

I've got to find out what's going on here, I bet it's dramatic

I checked out the "no moderators" group and the first post was someone asking whether there was still going to be a pan-Asian grocery store set up in a campustown location that was formerly a pet store. First response was a poorly-formed "joke" combining the name of an american chinese restaurant dish with "meow."

so I'm guessing the no-moderators policy is to avoid the thought police who banned racists

best post on nextdoor today is a response to a thread where a woman was looking for a vet to express her dog's anal glands. she did not express interest in doing it herself, and since she was asking for a vet to do it, one would assume she did not want to do it herself. a helpful reply gave lengthy step-by-step instructions for how to express the dog's anal glands.

I was inspired by this thread to see if there's Facebook group for my town, and there is, but it has 1 post with someone asking for recommendations for a roofer :(

actually i'm sorry, i lied. i had stopped reading at "you need exam gloves and vaseline," she doesn't say what to do next???

"Put jelly on your shoulder, lie down upon the carpet..."

We had our first dead dog photo.

SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LEAVE YOUR DOGS OUTSIDE IN THIS COLD WEATHER????? Dog laid flat on its side, half buried in two inches of snow, legs sticking straight as if he had been standing and then tipped over. THE OWNERS OF THIS DOG SHOULD SPEND A NIGHT OUT IN THE COLD LIKE THIS ONE.

Somebody from our animal control department posted that the dog was found with bite marks all over it, which you couldn't see in the photo. Also, if the dog had froze to death, it would've likely been found curled up, not laying on the ground like it's trying to get some sun on the left side too. Oh, and the owners have been notified since he was wearing a collar, they're mortified and saddened. (Also, I guess HIPPA doesn't cover animals.)

The response? ANIMAL CONTROL SHOULD HAVE RESCUED THE ANIMAL BEFORE IT WAS ATTACKED BY OTHER ANIMALS AND oh for chrissake why am i on this list.

i'm on it so i can read about how THE BIKE LANE NEEDS TO BE REMOVED because hits-and-runs have definitely increased since people in the city's richest neighborhood now have to park their cars in a place eight feet to the side from where they used to be and they are mad

Lol we also have a brand new bike lane and the neighborhood is NOT HAVING IT. I mean look at this photo I snapped on a 15 degree day, see any bikers?

I am relatively neutral on biking myself but all the right people get angry at bike lanes, so i’m all for them

My other favorite thing is whenever someone announces that a new eatery is going in some vacant 350sf storefront someone inevitably says “what we really need is a supermarket.”

There's a half mile stretch of road that went from four lanes to two lanes (+ a turn lane) and I tell ya that change has just *ruined* the lives of everyone within a half mile radius. And they used to have such a nice neighborhood.

Another one is people complaining about the fact that they are demolishing the structure of a “historic” (ugly, dilapidated and outdated) Jewish community center TO BUILD A BETTER FACILITY.

It “goes back to the holocaust,” which I’m pretty sure did not take place in Queens.

My other favorite thing is whenever someone announces that a new eatery is going in some vacant 350sf storefront someone inevitably says “what we really need is a supermarket.”

We had a Savers thrift store close, in a location that had also hosted a Food 4 Less and a Budget Saver.

So obviously, Trader Joe's was the pick among the neighbors to replace it. Nevermind that currently the closest one to us is in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Why not a location that couldn't even support three discount stores?

https://scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/27751694_10154957735670728_948591131771817845_n.jpg?oh=6eda69ffb582a4593e9f885d9a437db6&oe=5B0ABFA2

missing: 20 consecutive threads asking "Is anyone else's internet out?"

Had I known that Nextdoor was around the corner, I would've invested everything into Ring doorbell cameras.

https://twitter.com/bestofnextdoor

I forgot to post that here, but I think I tried sending that link to pplains on fb because of his love of neighborhoods

I learned of that account when they faved one of my Nextdoor tweets!

(Also, I never check FB messenger. Thanks though.)

I'll return to our regular smoke signal communication channel

totally and utterly useless picture of top of package stealer's head