that's why I love illegal torrent sites. At least even when the viewing is predictably dire, I can console myself that at least I'm successfully depriving this appalling channel of a few clicks.
― calzino, Tuesday, 19 September 2017 21:07 (six years ago) link
Good grief
That is fucking monstrous
It's not just 'business transactions presented in kid-speak', it's knowing adult to knowing adult in knowingly pretend kid-speak
― Never changed username before (cardamon), Tuesday, 19 September 2017 21:28 (six years ago) link
my line in full
A: the grown-ups are all gone, we will not see them again in our lifetimesB: bcz it's up to us now god help us C: deeper magic from before the dawn of modernity :| D: ^^^a fuckton of this, it's everywhere, it's the ground we all walk on and it's gone live again
― mark s, Thursday, 7 September 2017 18:59 (one week ago) Bookmark
― calzino, Tuesday, 19 September 2017 22:12 (six years ago) link
Not sure if this belongs here but
https://i.imgur.com/8YtBQgT.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/GEu1ysI.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/L3IMCdW.jpg
― nate woolls, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:32 (six years ago) link
I might be getting old and boring, but I'm so glad life has led me away from having to meet people like Atticus
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:49 (six years ago) link
Is that supposed to be some sort of super-meta level of irony? Like hipsters are now so self-aware they're being ironic about themselves? Or did the copywriter get the brief and literally copy and paste the audience description into the body text of the advert?
― Shat Parp (dog latin), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:49 (six years ago) link
"His beer crafty and his food street" is ultraviolet level ugh
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:51 (six years ago) link
Seriously, if it wasn't for the text in the tiny black rectangle at the bottom, I'd have thought this was an extract from the creative agency's pitch to their client, not the actual advert itself
― Shat Parp (dog latin), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:52 (six years ago) link
that is exactly how it reads, yeah
― Number None, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:53 (six years ago) link
No way do any of the Atticuses I've met have a "quiet" distaste
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:53 (six years ago) link
Unfortunately Atticus is going to be living 10 minutes away from my front door
― nate woolls, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:55 (six years ago) link
wonder what atticus' ilx login is
― more bemused than human (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:56 (six years ago) link
From the website:
https://i.imgur.com/0qtIv8t.png
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 09:57 (six years ago) link
gnnnnnggggghhhhhh― Mr. Eulon Mask, urging the UN to ban the "homicide robot" (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 19 September 2017 20:34 (two weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― Mr. Eulon Mask, urging the UN to ban the "homicide robot" (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 19 September 2017 20:34 (two weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
― more bemused than human (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:01 (six years ago) link
this is amazing. i'm amazed
― Shat Parp (dog latin), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:10 (six years ago) link
Also the flats are being built on the site of Manic Street Preachers' old studio.
― nate woolls, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:13 (six years ago) link
surely this is just really bad copy - like nobody self-identifies as a hipster, isn't that the entire thing that makes the word so frustrating? nobody is going to read that and think "yes that's me, i'm that guy", even subconsciously? maybe i'm putting too much faith in people.
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:13 (six years ago) link
frustrating? nobody is going to read that and think "yes that's me, i'm that guy",
"He is a pioneer of style and architect of his own subculture"
I'm guessing they're not trying to attract the hipster, but the conceited ageing douchebag hipster who manages him
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:18 (six years ago) link
"critically self-aware" = life-threatening levels of self-awareness
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:19 (six years ago) link
Yeah maybe. I suppose to an extent any of these "types" created to sell a given brand are deeply hateful. I've done bits of copy for some hotels in Dubai in the last few years and I feel dirty and sick inside each time I see the finished brochure.
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:20 (six years ago) link
xpost
the export of the "hipster" brand seems to have done more damage outside of big cities like london than the same thing did within the metropolis itself. like the amount of bullshit trickledown is off the scale, ime, bbq and burger restaurants everywhere, terrible copies of the london copies of nyc - just really grim.
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:21 (six years ago) link
so it's not all bad
― more bemused than human (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:24 (six years ago) link
Yeah, even in the London suburbs where I live, mostly middle-aged and older people, gentrification seems geared towards the 20 and 30somethings only - everything's a coffee shop for new parents, a chicken shack, a brunch place with the stereo on too loud etc. We're in boring Zone 3 and the biggest development is a boutique hotel.
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:27 (six years ago) link
xxp true dat. as though the caricature of the odious 2011 hipster strawman has been co-opted by smaller cities and commuter towns into an aspirational figure. While OG London hipsters feigned individuality, 2017's suburban hipsters WANT to drink in cafes with cartoon moustaches painted on the window as a matter of course.
― Shat Parp (dog latin), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:32 (six years ago) link
On a different note, while the "ISA" is grating on product packaging and promotional emails, the one place I can't stand it is on job adverts. Seeing '...and we even get to clock off early on the first Friday of every month YA-HOOOOO!!' on a job description definitely puts me off applying. If I wrote my CV like this, I doubt I'd get considered for an interview
― Shat Parp (dog latin), Wednesday, 4 October 2017 10:46 (six years ago) link
a big fuck off to Oatly
https://i.imgur.com/AzfV3cY.png
― Chuck_Tatum, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:26 (six years ago) link
that's p cynical, almost admirably so, at least as far as highlighting many people's blithe barely real interest in "street art"
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:29 (six years ago) link
it caused me vaguely irritably to read the whole thing when i passed it on the bus (which was stopped at that point): so i guess job done!
― mark s, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:32 (six years ago) link
"hey, maybe you stopped to say just the word 'look' at this wall, thinking it's something you know nothing about and hence could be interesting. well it's not, it's an ad for some fucking oat milk. did you take a photo of it too? you fucking idiot. anyway drink our oat milk."
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:37 (six years ago) link
"oat milk, filling the gaping empty holes riddled through your terrible eternal tourist existence"
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:38 (six years ago) link
i mean to be fair however they advertise this it has to conclude "drink our oat milk" and since that's the actual problem moment for most people they might as well go for broke
― mark s, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:40 (six years ago) link
like jonathan glazer's ad for flake (not used): https://vimeo.com/21190241
― mark s, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:43 (six years ago) link
these self-aware, faux-cringingly-apologetic ads are a fucking scourge
― hi i’m darren and i’m a bouncer from bendigo (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:52 (six years ago) link
it also looks like it was designed by someone who’s never actually seen any street art, so it even fails on its own terms ffs
― hi i’m darren and i’m a bouncer from bendigo (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:54 (six years ago) link
yeah the font just looks like bakery product #1
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:56 (six years ago) link
a better ad would be "continue to consume oats" with an image depicting a vast trough with people bent double over it, desperately scooping oat milk into their mouth with their hands
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 14:57 (six years ago) link
maybe a factory full of grinning workers, each squeezing an oat between their thumb and forefinger to express the oats’ sweet, precious milk
― hi i’m darren and i’m a bouncer from bendigo (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 15:01 (six years ago) link
WE SQUEEZE TO PLEASE
brb gonna hang myself
― hi i’m darren and i’m a bouncer from bendigo (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 15:02 (six years ago) link
"ah, the day is nearly done" printed over a happy exhausted pile of people resting after a day squeezing oats by hands to extract their precious milk
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 15:03 (six years ago) link
Oats Until You Die 👍
― ogmor, Tuesday, 28 November 2017 15:12 (six years ago) link
Somebody (maybe Verizon?) had an ad that said something like "you already know we have the best coverage, so here's a picture of a kitty."
― here come the warm jorts (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 28 November 2017 16:49 (six years ago) link
i feel like this belongs here
Fair play to Next, for creating clothing so incredibly cringeworthy and offensively twee that I dearly wish Kim Jong Un gets a fucking move on and ends us all pic.twitter.com/k7npzUmHJw— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) December 3, 2017
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Monday, 4 December 2017 10:10 (six years ago) link
https://img1.etsystatic.com/211/2/10540815/il_340x270.1341518701_or7x.jpg
― soref, Monday, 4 December 2017 10:28 (six years ago) link
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/001/368/i-am-error.jpg
― Chocolate-covered gummy bears? Not ruling those lil' guys out. (ulysses), Monday, 4 December 2017 16:56 (six years ago) link
I lolled
Boss: and you're sure you know the names of all the vegetables?Sign maker on his 1st day: ...yes pic.twitter.com/AbS5WzhmTM— Adam Hess (@adamhess1) December 5, 2017
― Alba, Sunday, 10 December 2017 14:17 (six years ago) link
Boss: "OK, let's negotiate your celery."
― Zings Can Only Get Better (snoball), Sunday, 10 December 2017 14:33 (six years ago) link
that We Buy Any Car Philip Schofield shite
― Number None, Sunday, 10 December 2017 17:23 (six years ago) link
today i learned that perpetually-irritating beer salesmen brewdog's crowdfunded expansion programme is called 'equity for punks' and now i want to kill myself
― your skeleton is ready to hatch (bizarro gazzara), Tuesday, 30 January 2018 10:35 (six years ago) link