Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

dear boss,
why did you wait until 1 week before leaving for china to arrange your business visa when you've known you were going for 2 months? arasl;dgkjadglkj thanks for making my last 3 days at this job so, so pleasant!

if it's your last 3 days - why do you care?

i have this crazy work ethic thing. ugh.

fuck it.
lets get drunk at lunch.

i can't even leave to go get my lunch! a;sldkgj

ya, god forbid they should fire you!

LOL theres no way hes gonna get a working visa to china in a week surely.

I am the person at jobs (or anywhere) who is always singing snippets of songs, and worse yet is usually shit like "Reach Out of the Darkness" by Friend & Lover or "My Life" by Billy Joel: songs I hate but that are real headworms.

Actually "Reach Out of the Darkness" is a total jam & I love it.

My husband calls this "boring Tourette's."

one of the extras in the commercial i'm working would . not. quit. fidgeting. wanted to strangle the doof.

Today _I_ am the stupid co-worker. Carrying too many things, arms full, tried to open door by violently kneeing the door handle, tore gaping hole in pants. Attempts to rectify hole with electrical tape have proven flawed. Am going home by public transport.

Attempts to rectify hole with electrical tape

i do like this can-do spirit though

seriously i have had nothing to do for like 2 weeks and now it's crazy time but she's all flippant like it's not a big deal. ugh. i know somehow she'll pull strings and end up with the visa and never learn her lesson.

So, a co-worker of mine has been "fucking up" in the words of another co-worker, and is on THIN ice, employment-wise.

I'm relatively new here, and they seem to like me a lot, and while I'm still learning the ropes, they see that I put forth a good effort and try my best all the time. In other words, I think I'm pretty safe at this point.

Still - shit is TENSE around here. Meeting next Tuesday to discuss things "will suck," by the words of the other co-worker. Yikes.

Co-worker to me: 'So she said 'do you think I've ever find a man in this city? I'm 32' and I said 'in this city? No way! No WAY!' (I'm 37 and single).

I've = I'll

I was the stupid co-worker the other day. My middle-aged female editor and I rounded a corner from opposite directions and nearly collided...

HER: You have to watch out for me around here. They say I'm like a bull in a China shop sometimes.

ME: Haha, like anyone would ever confuse this place with a China shop.

Hahah whoops snap.

"How do I look Professor?"
"Like a cheap French harlot!"
"...French!?"

MUTHAFUCKA I HAVE PLACES TO BE

LIKE

U THINK ITS A GAME OR

awwwwww sheeeet ain't you supposed to be out like 30 min ago?!!/!?!?

i am not even in this job anymore and i am still getting lazy emails about things that i pre-emptively advised them before i left. wtf it's called "Find" in Outlook. Use it.

if you have trouble, there is an ADVANCED FIND option!

T, u a treat.

<3

"can you make me a list from the database of the things which don't exist on the database"

I do not have words for how much nicer my job was when this person took a week off.

you need a left join. a left join on *everything*.

"can you make me a list from the database of the things which don't exist on the database"

make a venn diagram

ha haha - wow. i hope you took that as literally as possible.

(a) those that belong to the Emperor,
(b) embalmed ones,
(c) those that are trained,
(d) suckling pigs,
(e) mermaids,
(f) fabulous ones,
(g) stray dogs,
(h) those that are included in this classification,
(i) those that tremble as if they were mad,
(j) innumerable ones,
(k) those drawn with a very fine camel’s hair brush,
(l) others,
(m) those that have just broken a flower vase,
(n) those that resemble flies from a distance

Is that Jacob's list?

I wouldn't know about that kind of thing, Ted.

ha hahaha!

seriously lady, do you talk at your husband at this rate of words per minute without actually saying anything remotely interesting or related to the task at hand? because he is either a saint, hearing impaired, or he lost a bet. how did your family put up with this when you were growing up? did they ever "accidentally" leave you at rest stops?

OK, this guy I work with (who is here because I recommended him for the job - sort of distant friend/acquaintance/friend of friend person) has been exhibiting very snotty, aggresive frustration with everything for some time now, and today he full on almost screamed "HOY!" at one of our suppliers on the phone to shut the guy up and demand he do something.

The guy sounds like he's about to go postal, it's making me horribly nervous.

He's always really pissy and sarcastic, like he's forgotten how to talk to people or something.

Some MFer just stole my creamer out of the fridge. They didn't finish it without asking or anything. THEY STOLE THE WHOLE NEARLY FULL BOTTLE. WTF?

oh shit! My boss had that happen to her earlier (though we think someone just finished the nearly-empty bottle, not outright stole one with cream in it!) and so the one in the fridge now has "Don't even THINK about it" written on it. Heh.

I honestly wouldn't care if someone just used a little or something but c'mon stealing the whole bottle? This is ridiculous!

ok, complaint time..
no one i work with is stupid or annoying. but people in my department tend to push off as many pieces of tasks as they can onto those who make tech requests & to be awfully grouchy/not the most accommodating about them. it was the culture i walked into (last hired). a colleague who's a step up on the ladder from me does this & is effectively the one who sets guidelines. it never struck me that we were THAT overwhelmed by work that we couldn't take the extra step when asked, as long as it didn't get out of hand. i try to be cool about requests and just get stuff done, but said colleague, if there, will insist on asking people for all this specific information before we do anything.

and now it's like, well, if you gradually trained other people throughout the organization, bit by bit, to do parts of our jobs, NO WONDER THE POWERS THAT BE ARE LIKELY TO GET RID OF OUR JOBS. what a clusterfuck! the thing is, i don't really share the attitude of most of the rest of my team (things are changing, you just gotta try and roll with it), and it's like.. how do i connect with others at the organization to figure out if there's a different place for me there, when this is what goes on. (in fairness they're all younger than me & i already had a couple years' experience elsewhere at navigating - badly - the minefield of office politics.)

I think you may be talking about a different kind of tech, but that's how it was at my last job. Whenever I called IT they were really grouchy and did anything they could not to help me. At my current job, IT is really good.

However, there are rumors that the last 200 or so people hired in my system will be layed off in July. Co-workers, none of them recent hires, keep on asking me my "start date." Implicit in the question is their assessment of whether or not I will be fired.

I started a year and a half ago. If there are lay-offs, there is a good chance I will be among them. However, is it too much to ask for co-workers to have some tact and to keep their thoughts about my future to themselves?

VP im in a company that was bought out last year but a much bigger company. the layoffs have been weirdly random. in a lot of cases people who have been there 20+ years. ive only been there 2 1/2 which still makes me the new chick but so far ive survived 6 months of constant layoffs. i dont do a better job than most people who are gone and i would certainly be a lot cheaper to get rid of. its really illogical from our point of view (although im sure there is reasoning behind it all). so i wouldnt worry too much about who has been there longest.

Yes, you got a wafflemaker. I'm so proud of you I'm bursting at the seams. But I don't need to hear about it for 2 and a half hours. Shut up shut up shut up.

when we had layoffs here it was the older, more expensive people who got the chop for the most part. same with a previous place i worked. this could be more an advertising thing tho.

When I worked in publishing, they let the older people go because they cost more money. But now I work for the government and am union, and I believe it is done strictly by seniority--last hired first fired. I'm not sure how they allocate for various levels of positions though.

some of the dead weight was cut. but most mostly oldies. sometimes i'm glad there's no such thing as unions in this industry. i could not imagine having to keep around people who can't pull their weight simply because they have seniority.

Sometimes that happens by default even WITHOUT unions. There are people here who will never leave who I'm not sure are even entirely literate.

how does that work?!

That type of things happen a lot. I think nearly every job I've ever had was populated by 1 or 2 long-time employees that no one seemed to want to get rid of, even though they seemed to be complete and utter failures at their assigned tasks.