'Even allowing for inflation, this thread is not worth 198 Terry Francises' - EPL 2017-18

piece of piss this league!

http://www.genti.stream/hd3.php

haha cheers mate

Palace pure panic! De Boer staggering under the weight of new formed forehead wrinkles

'rooney getting stuck in'

Both teams have started with the in-vogue three-man central defence system Everton have Dominic Calvert-Lewin in the right wing-back position. He's normally an attacking player and has already been caught out a few times by Stoke's Erik Pieters overlapping on the visitors' left wing. Wayne Rooney was given a huge cheer when his name was read out over the loudspeakers at the start. The biggest cheer of all Everton's five new signings. Rooney is rolling his sleeves up and getting stuck in as well, his most meaningful contribution so far was a defensive diving header to clear away a Stoke corner.

when words have the rhythm of a joke but are sad, not funny.

ha! ha! Zaha fails to win a penalty from being a persistent diving twat!

Palace are an absolute shambles. If this is De Boer's 'possession football' he'll be out by september.

Huddersfield bright and keen.

Burnley 2-0

(bit of Zanka's well-known non-defending there, whew)

Three!

You knew it was over when Conte went out in a tracksuit.

Burnley cruelly displace Huddersfield from top spot

:D

And Rooney scores. A day of miracles all round.

is this that famous "street football" that Pardew was trying to invoke when he was at Palace? As in disorganised and just turning up to while away 90 mins!

This is the best opening weekend ever.

Otm.

Commentator "Huddersfield may tire towards the last third of the game"

these cunts have done zero research on Wagner's training regime.

If anything Palace will tire towards the last third of the game because they've no clue and are shit.

This is mostly due to Wagner's game plan imo, pressing up really high, making Palace v nervous.

Apologies to renown pundit Martin Keown for scoffing; he was otm.

Brave JT's Villa losing 1-0 at Cardiff as well.

Mounie 3-0 . Fuck he'll be gone by the jan transfer window!

Mounie!

xp

Mind you, he might stay if we are still in a champion's league berth!

Vardy's still at Leicester, so I don't see why Mounié can't stay after winning the title.

Fabregas sent off now too

3-2 though.

These pricks had better not get something out of this.

Morata's been really good

Paulinho IN at Barca. £36.5m

there now, everyone's happy.

Lol what a day of sporting glory

If Barca then shell out for Soldado and Vlad Chiriches we need to start worrying.

watching MOTD has re-affirmed that Lossl has made two very good saves today, but still his distribution is L1 standard. but sometimes they all seem shite tbh.

Was at a wedding miles from radio or any other telecommunications infrastructure.

Did I miss owt

I think the main story was that apart from a few exceptions, most premiership defences are still in pissed up holiday mode.

Sissoko in the starting line-up oh dear.

Booing Sissoko is odd. How many Newcastle fans would have rather he stayed?

he acted like a twat his entire time there tbf

bit of a let-off for Kyle Walker jr. there

Walker-Peters has looked alright so far tbf. He and Sissoko are playing lots of meaningless passes to one another.

Imagine if Newcastle fans booed every player who gave up on their club.

hooray harry sticks one up some daft frenchman #fuckoff #brexit

No fucking way that was accidental from Shelvey.

hah! what an absolute shithead and good news for us.

Lovely.

I can cope with Trippier being off for a few more weeks, KWP is fine here.

good to have Newcastlol back bringing the lols where they belong

classy lot for booing a player mainly because he was deliberately stamped on.

he's also a massive cunt though

I wasn't aware of that tbh. What has he done?