EXCELSIOR is the second solo album by British musician LOLZ Coombes.

http://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/9/1/4/91914_v2.jpg

hmmmmmm still not sure if this is a "funny posts" thread or not

think it's pretty obvious

While thread is in meta-mode can I thank tombot for generously reading my trump/jeep heer quip in such a way as to maximize the funny.

jeep heer lol

We're talking about a country where most people's primary educations are from McDonalds ads.

― carpet_kaiser, Wednesday, 2 August 2017 18:31 (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Holy shit is this true

― jk rowling obituary thread (darraghmac), Wednesday, August 2, 2017 4:09 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It is true, unless you had parents who intervened. More depressing than funny IMO.

was about to carpet a trench

http://i.imgur.com/I51cZMC.jpg

Don't fuckin play with me I seen four twin peaks this week Im in a vulnerable place

we all learned from this helpful man

Very uncool to hit up a staggered Irishman with a pic of a dude in mickface

that was my geometry teacher and he had a skin disease you ass

U guys take it outside, this is not the place for genuine lolz.

And to think people used to rag on me back in the day for posting too many lols.

My Alma Mater

https://goo.gl/images/KB9up3

BTW, if any UK television programs want me as a commentator I am available at any time. It would be nice to turn the tables a bit. Our coverage of UK politics is frequently condescending and exoticist - Did you know they have a queen there? And did you know that, with any new legislation, the queen has consults her orb, and waves her scepter over a bacon butty while wearing a bearskin hat. Then she changes into a wig and takes a sword out of a stone.

I would be happy to enlighten Britishes about the special rabbitskin robes worn by electors, and how the President Pro Tem of the Senate consults a haruspex whenever there is a veto. Unless there is not a quorum, in which case they must shake a Magic 8 Ball no fewer than seven times. Then it goes to the Weights and Memes committee, which votes by secret ballot, and even then only at midnight.

― okapi paste (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, August 4, 2017 12:11 PM (eleven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

kickstarter.com/toAuntieBeebwiththatYMPladiirc

― Le Bateau Ivre, Friday, August 4, 2017 12:16 PM (six minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You forgot to mention the importance of catching the snitch.

― I'm Calling My Loyer! (Old Lunch), Friday, August 4, 2017 12:17 PM (five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I find your sense of humor obscrutable and perspicalic.

"Weights and Memes" is pretty classic though, good job YMP

I've only ever reported to women in ten years in the public sector it's cool because you can blind them with logic iirc

― jk rowling obituary thread (darraghmac), Tuesday, August 8, 2017 12:39 PM (forty-two minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you don't actually go blind when you roll your eyes all the way back

― mh, Tuesday, August 8, 2017 12:40 PM (forty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

Would tour with

a+

vg++

Fascinating that Bannon can't find his own ass yet can suck his own cock.

― Josh in Chicago, 12. august 2017 05:50 (fourteen hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Well, he does have a large staff.

― nickn, 12. august 2017 09:16 (ten hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

guh

man those daily stormer guys just can't catch a break huh

― for sale: clown shoes, never worn (bizarro gazzara), Monday, August 14, 2017 7:34 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

every day, it's another storm

― this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Monday, August 14, 2017 7:35 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sage words, from a man who thinks the expression is 'treat the cure'.

obviously i meant treat the disease. but feel free to further punish me in bad faith for being ideologically inconsistent while offering zero ideas of your own

― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, August 15, 2017 2:48 PM (four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Just cos nobody else has any ideas doesn't mean you should give us yours

― jk rowling obituary thread (darraghmac), Tuesday, August 15, 2017 2:49 PM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

looooool

<3

Many a true word...

A+

if someone comes after the lincoln memorial, call me.

― flappy bird, Wednesday, August 16, 2017 6:07 PM (eleven minutes ago) Bookmark

https://media.giphy.com/media/s5C4U3oAw4yeQ/giphy.gif

― 龜, Wednesday, August 16, 2017 6:20 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I like the idea that Megatron clip suggests, that we just carved a throne and a statue of Lincoln showed up and sat in it.

― erry red flag (f. hazel), Wednesday, August 16, 2017 6:59 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

(edited for maximum LOLs)

The only way I can see the City of Oakland saying yes is if the rally promoters paid the City very large sums of money and they had it in a relatively out of the way place

― sansa riff (sarahell), Thursday, August 17, 2017 9:20 AM (nineteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Well, the city could say no but the court might say yes.

― Eallach mhór an duine leisg (dowd), Thursday, August 17, 2017 9:22 AM (seventeen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dim the lights
you can guess the rest

― the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, August 17, 2017 9:25 AM (fourteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sweet.

^^ what I'm thinking of.

yeah i just bought several hundred thousand shares of GE on the news. it just felt right.

xpost

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 18 August 2017 22:11 (fifty minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

xposts

After a morning of drooping stock prices, the Dow Jones rose 27 points in the minutes following the news, according to MarketWatch, while the S&P 500 gained 8 points and the NASDAQ composite index rose 30 points.
a rise of 27 points is a rise of about 0.19%. Then it closed modestly down on the day

[

― Karl Malone, Friday, 18 August 2017 22:12 (forty-nine minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shit

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 18 August 2017 22:18 (forty-three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i am still trying to decide what to think about this juggalo situation

Grab it by the posse.

― Tone-Locrian (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, August 19, 2017 8:53 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

When will you idiots change to celcius like a civilized country?

― Frederik B

a question of both kind and degree

― streeps of range (wins)

i dunno about right or wrong but Ilx used to be at least interesting. Now its the same vaginal-male perspective you get literally everywhere else

― sleepingbag, Tuesday, August 22, 2017 8:29 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

whut

― a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Tuesday, August 22, 2017 8:33 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

listen I'm just a regular guy, I put my vagina on one leg at a time like everybody else

― Universal LULU Nation (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, August 22, 2017 8:35 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I don't get the positioning of the hole in the USS McCain in a collision. It's very low for a ship that was larger than it and it is in the middle towards the rear. So how is that a collision, looks like a broadsiding and would be more predictable from a vessel lower than it, surely?

― Stevolende, 23. august 2017 13:15 (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I think it's because it was hit by the little protrusion (the 'bulbous bow', I am told) at the front of the tanker.

― how's life, 23. august 2017 14:00 (two hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the tanker has a dick?

― Neanderthal, 23. august 2017 14:16 (two hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well, it is full of seamen

― frankfurters take on new glamour in this gleaming aspic (bizarro gazzara), 23. august 2017 14:21 (two hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol penis

My guitar teacher plays in a band that covers a different act each month, perfectly replicating the studio versions of the songs. Steely Dan to the Band to the Replacements, Smiths, Neil Young, Michael Jackson, Stevie Wonder and Prince, etc.. It's usually pretty packed but he told me the smallest crowd they ever had was for the night they did the Velvet Underground.

― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 23 August 2017 09:44 (twenty-two minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah but everyone in that crowd went and started their own cover band

― rock and roll tucci coo (voodoo chili), Wednesday, 23 August 2017 09:45 (twenty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

perfect setup

Can't miss stuff

I was just going to ask (rhetorically) who these people are who could sit for 90 minutes and listen to a pathetic blubbermonster (who has a lot of money and holds the highest office in the country) whine yet again about how unfair the world is to him. His attempts to make it about anyone BUT him are perfunctory, at best.

― Always Be Cropdusting (Old Lunch), Wednesday, August 23, 2017 9:39 AM (four minutes ago)

leave out the "highest office" bit and you could be describing a latter-day Morrissey gig

― a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Wednesday, August 23, 2017 9:42 AM (one minute ago)

amazing shouldn't necessarily imply an endorsement - like, 9/11 was amazing imo

― frankfurters take on new glamour in this gleaming aspic (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, August 23, 2017 4:32 AM (eight hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

but i don't think it was entirely good

― frankfurters take on new glamour in this gleaming aspic (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, August 23, 2017 4:33 AM (eight hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cos he is king

― Neanderthal, Sunday, 27 August 2017 15:34 (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

who wants or needs a king? they just fuck you over.

― A is for (Aimless), Sunday, 27 August 2017 18:13 (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

trickle-down necronomics

― angelo irishagreementi (ledge), Sunday, 27 August 2017 18:43 (forty-four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Context: why would anyone worship Satan? thread