They're Remaking 'Alien' -- the 'Prometheus' thread

I overheard them cracking jokes about the class they skipped.

whereupon I called the cops

as one does

David's Byron line almost made me lose faith in the film.

What the hell you guys. I loved this movie! Critiquing the character's choices and questioning "how dumb they are" makes me wonder why any of you bought tickets for this. You're all expecting way too much from a summer horror film.

I'm late to this but Colossal suuuuuucked so much, this basically has to be better

I saw Colossal, my theory that past 4 'u's, this turns into a recommendation holds up.

The "expecting too much from a summer movie" argument is so weak, I'm sorry. I mean, I'm glad you enjoyed it, but generally speaking, characters you connect with and understand are an *asset* to a summer movie, to a horror movie, to pretty much most kinds of movies that seek to operate as entertainment. Again, see the original Alien for reference. Or Jaws, for that matter.

It's really hard to feel the thrills and chills when every line of dialogue pushes you out of the screen, reminds you that these are off-brand action figures Ridley is smashing against each other in his Creepy Basement Action Playset, who do things just because.

I didn't feel pushed out of the scenes, and I barely registered who the director was. The only characters I really cared about were Tennessee, Daniels, and, weirdly, the alien. The movie seemed to be smart enough to have engineered (!) those feelings because those are the characters left alive at the end. Well and David, who I didn't really care about but who was fascinating nonetheless. Yes he delivered a lot of self-important hokum about "creation" but it felt right to me, like a teenager who's just like, REALLY gotten into Pink Floyd man. I mean, I agree it's not as good as Alien but very few films are!

Why did I connect to Tennessee? He had a vaguely Southern accent, was funny, loyal and brave. Why did I connect to Daniels? She was down to earth, not afraid to push back hard when the Capt. was being an idiot, and was good at thinking on her feet. And er, why did I connect to the alien? Cause it's just trying to get along man! Like The Doctor says, hungry can look a lot like evil from the wrong end of the cutlery

Doctor Casino - yes, some additional better drawn characters would have been great, but it's not really something I was looking for or expecting. Then again, I'm probably part of the problem, as I would totally go see a movie called "Ridley's Creepy Basement Action Playset".

casting Danny McBride and Amy Seimetz as a couple is still kind of messing with me

fyi Aliens Dark Horse #0 available on Amazon for free comic book day, alas Kindle only

but tbf, I've just noticed that the whole stories are only about £1.84 each on Kindle anyway

Okay wtf, Aliens Labyrinth is available on paperback for £1,169 ?!

worth every penny iirc

here's a wiffle ball bat for over a hundred euros.

https://www.amazon.fr/WIFFLE-32-Plastic-Long-Bat/dp/B01NBZCUJG/

Feel like if yr expectations are so low that you think this film is good and fun, you could just as easily save yr $, stay home and watch yr toilet flush every now and then

you can do both and i expect i shall *stocks up on bathroom popcorn*

"you know how we've been sitting here watching this toilet flush"

"yeah"

"who's been flushing it?"

*alien goo drips from ceiling*

*facehugger erupts from toilet bowl*

actually maybe this is the fresh direction the series needs - more of a ghoulies vibe

Feel like if yr expectations are so low that you think this film is good and fun, you could just as easily save yr $, stay home and watch yr toilet flush every now and then

We went camping this past weekend, and the first morning it started just pouring rain. So the other early risers were all, hey, let's see a movie (with our early riser kids). And there were, amazingly, showtimes before 9am! Unfortunately, the options were pretty much the Smurfs and Boss Baby. Alien was playing maybe an hour or so later, with a 10am screening, so I pleaded, come on, just wait another hour so that I can at least see Alien, because I am not fucking seeing Boss Baby. But then I thought, man, how desperate, that I was begging them to hold off the trip to see Boss Baby just so that I could see Alien because there was literally nothing better to do first thing Sunday morning in Wisconsin when it's pouring raining. And then I thought, man, has it really come to this? If the camping situation is so bad that people are seeing Boss Baby and you are begging them to hold off so so you can see Alien ... that's just a sign that it's time to go home. Which we all did, right after Boss Baby (I went out for coffee instead of trying to see Alien). And then right after that the rain stopped, the sky cleared, and it was beautiful. I'd like to think it took the rest of the crew sacrificing their standards and dignity to see Boss Baby that did it.

By the way, apparently they saw a dude at the theatre at 9am with a full platter of hot dog, soda and Snickers bar. What's up with that? Maybe he was depressed that it was too early to see Alien and he was killing time by having an early lunch (breakfast) while he waited? Or maybe he had seen the Alien movie the day before and had lingered at the theatre overnight in shame.

What's up with that?

america iirc

Wisconsin, which is even more America than most of America.

the local alamo-like theater is a fine place to get a breakfast burrito and beer at your 10am showing

or a mimosa if you lean that way

love a venue that caters to the terminally alcoholic cineaste

setting out for a camping trip that quickly detours into having to go see 'the boss baby' is a more horrifying and unsettling plotline than anything to be found in 'alien: covenant.'

haha, otm

Lol

"I want to be devoured by mosquitoes and then see a film reducing my will to live."

David the Android: "...so my little creations would be...a release?"

i hated prometheus with all my heart but i liked this

You and Alfred, fighting the tide.

i mean it's just a horror movie surrounding a weird explicitly queer star trek-y middle. fassbender vs. fassbender is the best ridley scott film in years imo

ppl were like "wow the crew in this movie is the dumbest yet" but nah other than the lady who broke quarantine and fired on a bunch of oxygen tanks no way do they make dumber decisions than anyone in prometheus

Imagine if Cronenberg had cast Fassbender as Freud and Jung.

naked fassbender or just the regular one?

All Fassbender is Naked Fassbender

ppl were like "wow the crew in this movie is the dumbest yet" but nah other than the lady who broke quarantine and fired on a bunch of oxygen tanks no way do they make dumber decisions than anyone in prometheus

Bad robot: hey captain come peer into this monster egg I promise it isn't a monster egg

Captain: ok well I just found out you're the bad guy so *sticks entire face right the fuck into the monster egg*

^^^as dumb as any of the decisions in prometheus, maybe. dumber? no

lol fair, I'd say the same of the woman who shot up the oxygen tanks actually - all about equally dumb

Bad robot: hey captain come peer into this monster egg I promise it isn't a monster egg

Captain: ok well I just found out you're the bad guy so *sticks entire face right the fuck into the monster egg*

― in a soylent whey (wins), Thursday, June 1, 2017 9:02 AM (twenty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

eh, i'll allow it if it causes billy crudup to die horribly

as a friend said, at least there wasn't an unmotivated suicide in this one

Crudup was beautiful once.

also i'm pretty inured to horror movie logic so "peering into something that is obviously going to kill you" is fine with me in a way that, say, "charlize theron gets flattened by a spaceship bc she's only capable of running in a straight line" isn't

i revisited prometheus before watching the new one, the anger is fresh

I went to the local theater that has the beer/food delivered to your seat and they seat you early to get orders, and show a reel of material related to the movie. Included was one of those youtube "honest reviews" or w/e for Prometheus, which would normally drive me nuts because it's nitpicking, but with Prometheus... they were pretty on point

Which was the unmotivated suicide?

idris elba sacrificing himself and two other undeveloped crew members by flying the prometheus straight into the side of the engineer's ship... because....noomi rapace said it was a bad ship????

He'd already seen the armaments by then, and had a conversation with her about how that ship could never reach earth.

(I assumed you meant The Boy with the Worm in his Eye)

yes i also remember the scene where idris started speaking in pure exposition