rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

'god knows what's in the sauce but it was delicious' made me lol irl btw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kxYkZtoAi8

I've never heard, locally, anything other than a beef (or beef-approximating) patty on a bun referred to as a burger. As in, a burger is a beef hamburger patty. Black bean burgers or whatever vegan equivalent usually means something that looks like a beef hamburger but isn't.

Chicken on a bun is a chicken sandwich. I'm fine with "chicken burger" but it's not really a thing here

I guess a fringe case would be a ground meat on bun thing, the ground meat (or faux-meat) patty is the thing. I've had lamburgers and "chicken burgers" but they were ground meat, not a piece of chicken

i've never had kimchi and thought 'what this needs is more 7up'

mh, here in the nightmare netherworld of theresa may's britain chicken burgers are def a thing, eg

https://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/641/5000116101641/IDShot_540x540.jpg

made with real bird's eyes iirc

completely aware, just saying it's not the norm in the kfc homeland

that smashburger chain I mentioned above, their website has it differentiated to the point there's a stark BURGERS | CHICKEN category distinction!
http://smashburger.com/eat/menu/

i just looked at burger king's uk website to confirm that they serve a chicken burger (they do) and i found a link to a bk delivery site which opens on this display of mysterious matter

http://i1247.photobucket.com/albums/gg622/bizarrogazzara/Lumps_zpsuauhrnxr.jpg

i feel like having these brought to your house could be considered a hate crime

the product on the right looks like some sort of cheese popper which would have jalapeno bits inside in the US, but I hesitate to make any assumptions on what the green bits could be elsewhere

lime jelly, iirc

the yellow stuff is custard

Whatever happened to the jalapeño popper? Used to be everywhere. I guess I don't really patronize fast casual chains anymore so maybe I'm just not seeing them in my bubble.

went full fast food, people burned out on them afaik

looking closer i think those burger king 'snacks' might be served on old wallpaper offcuts

re: Seven-Up recipes - - - I can't seem to find Lileks's original coverage of Cooking With Seven-Up (maybe pulled after being incorporated into a book?) but here's a worthwhile followup series: http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/sevenup2/index.html

http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/sevenup2/4.jpg

when my great-grandmother was alive she made something like the above jello mold every thanksgiving that involved lime jello, 7-up, fruit cocktail, a shitload of whipped cream, and CELERY AND WALNUTS

god knows i miss her but i do not miss that

. . . piquant . . . delicious!

I never knew about the burger thing!

https://www.kfc.com/menu/sandwiches/
http://www.kfc.co.nz/menu/burger-combos/

This is an ontological error that must be corrected by conquest

Kumara Tower Stacker

Take a bite into this Kiwi twist on our famous Tower burger. Original recipe fillet, a golden kumara hash brown, tasty tomato mustard sauce, cheese and crispy onions. If you’re feeling brave, the Kumara Stacker with an extra fillet is just for you!

Add a little spice and ask for a Zinger!

Yes pls!!!

-1 fillet I'm not a monster

uh, i... i... i'm feeling brave

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL_Xyi2u-T8

was legit expecting that amiable tractor driver to unhinge his jaw to eat that fucking thing

you just kinda bang your face into it i guess

the fuck is a "DOUBLE FILLITZ"

http://www.bbc.com/news/av/business-39896838/a-cheaper-tastier-way-to-eat-lunch-at-work

this is getting mocked on twitter, as you'd expect, but it led me to the BRITISH SANDWICH AWARDS, which has some amazing corporate chain restaurant copywriting

http://awards.sandwich.org.uk/index.php/awards/winners/197-the-new-sandwich-product-award-winner

Food Ingredient Category
My Bombay Airwrap

The judges comments are very expressive: "I would buy this product."

http://awards.sandwich.org.uk/index.php/sandwich-designer-competition

This year's competition categories are:

The Harvey and Brockless Pesto & Relish Sandwich Designer of the Year
The H. Smith Food Group Tuna Sandwich Designer of the Year
The New York Bakery Bagels Sandwich Designer of the Year
The Norseland Mexicana®, Applewood® and Jarlsberg® Sandwich Designer of the Year
The Pan'Artisan Focacia Romana Sandwich Designer of the Year
The Sam Browne Foods British Red Tractor, Farm Assured Poultry Sandwich Designer of the Year

Two new options from returning sponsors, Harvey and Brockless, contestants may choose to use either or both of the products, together with other ingredients of their choice to create their sandwich recipe.

Choose From
Finest Pesto

Not just your average run of the mill pesto, this Fresh Basil Pesto is created with a blend of Veronese basil, our Luca 100% Picual Extra Virgin Olive Oil, 24 month Parmigiano-Reggiano, pine nuts and garlic. It combines everything you would want in an authentic fresh pesto; intensity, saltiness, texture and a herbaceous kick allowing it to stand up to any ingredient it is put with.

Green Kraut Relish

For the love of all things fermented our team have developed a sauerkraut relish cooked with cucumber, dill and cider vinegar to create the quintessential sweet, tart, textured relish that works fantastically in contrast to a range of ingredients from American hotdogs to Scandinavian salmon. Our Greenkraut relish is bang on trend and packs a fragrant punch.

bang on trend

combines everything you want in a pesto... basil, olive oil, pine nuts, parm, garlic

skimmed too fast and thought there was a pesto with sauerkraut in it

Ah that's our sauerpest range.

lol

the yellow stuff is custard

― The Patricia Routledge Meatspin Gif Has Made You Gay (bizarro gazzara)

dripping from a dead bird's eye?

http://i.imgur.com/m7M7PbU.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/0IuaN0C.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/d6AypSE.jpg

😫

https://www.mcdonalds.es/productos/sandwiches/grand-mcextreme-mcdonald-s-grill

a friend of mine is in madrid and just alerted me to the GRAND MCEXTREME DE MCDONALD'S

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/business/wp/2017/05/18/lucky-charms-cannot-find-the-magic-in-natural-ingredients-so-its-going-full-on-sugar-bomb/?utm_term=.5317f2a03127&tid=a_inl

Americans are eating less cereal, but executives at General Mills are hoping they’ve found a way to revive sales: By offering customers a chance to win one of 10,000 boxes filled with nothing but Lucky Charms marshmallows.

On its website, General Mills calls marshmallow-only Lucky Charms “the unicorn of the cereal world — fantasized about, but never seen.” In reality, they come with more sugar per serving than a Snickers bar or Twinkie.

It’s a change in direction for the maker of Cheerios, Trix and Wheaties, which two years ago announced it would remove artificial flavors and colors from Lucky Charms marshmallows by 2017. That effort has since stalled — company scientists have yet to find natural substitutes that won’t affect flavor — but Mike Siemienas, a Lucky Charms spokesman, says work is ongoing.

“It’s still our biggest challenge,” Siemienas said. “We’ll let you know once we’ve found a solution.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/23/dining/jamaican-beef-patties.html?smid=tw-nytfood&smtyp=cur&_r=0

https://static01.nyt.com/images/2017/05/24/dining/24PATTY2/24PATTY2-master675.jpg

BEEF PATTY FOOD LAB

Huh, so Spanish McDonalds don't have 'burger' anywhere, they're all called 'sandwiches' and not even the Spanish word for sandwiches, yet burgers exist in Spain

https://www.bacoaburger.com

I'm not sure why this is all so fascinating to me

I was in a Burger King the other day because shut up don't judge me, and I saw that they allow you to add extra patties to your Whopper and it's limitless, although they charge you per patty.

when I was in high school, some kids in the class before mine had an annual contest where they would try to one-up each other by ordering a six or seven party whopper

patty, that is. their stomachs threw the party

was everyone invited?

after six or seven whoppers in one sitting i'm sure that's not all their stomachs threw

that sauce in the south carolina stack from mcdonalds (uk) was good
but the bun was a bit breakfast muffiny, i didn't like it too much

i'm going to ireland this weekend and i was curious about the mcdonald's menu on offer there... unfortunately this item was phased out a couple of weeks back

http://www.mcdonalds.ie/iehome/food/full_menu/beef/gta_new_york_stack1.html

when I was in high school, some kids in the class before mine had an annual contest where they would try to one-up each other by ordering a six or seven party whopper

― mh, Wednesday, May 24, 2017 5:22 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

in high school my friend dave and i would see how many mcdonalds hamburgers we could eat. i think he did 8 and i 6 or 7.