why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

str8 masturpiece

I keep inviting people to the table of my life, nobody wants to come.

https://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/050c43f16acc2b203563c5dae6d4a38d2763c0-wm.jpg?v=3

seems like a pretty chill guy

trying to work out if that's a Freud watch

sick of these recipe videos

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/Screen%20Shot%202017-03-24%20at%203.08.36%20PM_zpsefhl7hmo.png

The raccoon ones are ok https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-3LD1JRmuc

I just want to say that my life does not resemble a table. kthxbye.

on my facebook today...

https://pics.onsizzle.com/unfuck-yourself-be-who-youwere-before-all-that-stuff-happened-3659456.png

what if I was a garbage 5 year old

feel like its some ancient ur-meme that will be passed down from generation to generation. there are a million versions of it.

yeah, some of "that stuff that happened" was totally my fault.

Cool to think that might pop up in the feeds of ppl who have been victims of sexual assault

https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/17626383_1616881411674055_7203349409140447442_n.jpg?oh=a00da97e8e6dde5105f08f483a939fda&oe=596BB5A9

that is one of the worst structured sentences i've ever seen

damn

these last two are among the worst things i've seen on this thread

it's possible to read that as the kid throws the fries, the attractive man throws the fries or Mr. McDonald throws the fries
it is also possible to read that as the narrator throwing their fries or their kid on the ground

I agree that all those readings are there. But I believe that the intended meaning is: "I threw my fries on the ground in order to get the attractive man to spank me."

Because otherwise it's very difficult to get an attractive man to spank you.

Thought spanking had been replaced by social media

Yeah I read that as the attractive man dumping his fries and then spanking his kid which I admit did make me laugh

i saw an attractive man throw his kid on the ground, starving, hysterical naked so i threw my attractive man on the ground too and yes i said yes i will yes

I have eaten
the fries
that you threw on
the ground

and which
you were probably
spanking
your kid for

Forgive me
they were delicious
so dirty
now spank me

^

I saw the attractive man of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked,
spanking his kid at McDonalds after he threw his fries on the ground, etc., etc.

I'm just repeating jokes someone else already made, what a day...

I need a break

repeating something someone else has done tends to result in spanking tbf

fries are starting to sound strangely erotic

xp

maybe that's why I did it, hint hint

luv gettin sex spanked in front of a stranger's child at the mcdonalds

Attractive man threw his kids fries on the ground, and spanked Paul Weller in the tube station at midnight..

there's probably a painting of that on the internet

pretty sure that meme was the plot of an ally mcbeal episode

[photo of man spanking child in macdonalds]

12. After years of fry throwing by children and horny women, many working class voters finally turned to spanking.

meaning was obvious, feigned obtusity always the weakest of arguments

But Onan knew that the child would be spanked; so whenever he ate at McDonalds, he threw his fries on the ground to get spanked by an attractive man.

https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t31.0-8/17621657_1477180388960214_5523191751946365379_o.png?oh=c915a1d8e02c067159eb0964335ac56e&oe=5952706F

I assume anyone dressed like that is a massive coke fiend.

I assume they're unlikely to teach me anything of value

blessedarethecheesemakers.gif

unintentional screenname synchronicty there

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ode_(poem)

_______ liked this.
My Inappropriate Thoughts shared I'm a vindictive little BITCH's photo.

https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/17629844_1485387761502527_8294739377769336491_n.jpg?oh=8345539c725ad552a557b855714833f5&oe=594C882E

https://hips.htvapps.com/htv-prod-media.s3.amazonaws.com/ibmig/cms/image/wapt/23978254-23978254.jpg

these colored status updates are the dumbest fucking things

http://i.imgur.com/g3EmOLE.png

The worst.

Yeah I don't know why people are doing those; it seems to elevate idle banter to meme or quote status. Which is great if your random daily thoughts are in fact profound, but it just looks silly otherwise.

Allergy season has arrived!
-Bob Marley

Was it in this thread that someone linked in a blog post about the epistemology of the shitpic?

It was a fairly long discussion about how no one takes a meme seriously if it looks clean. Because it hasn't been copied / cropped / compressed / overwritten, that must mean that no one has liked it enough to steal and rework it yet. So it must not be a very profound thought.

That's what I think of when I see those status updates. You're just saying what you had for breakfast; it's not an epic takedown or universal truth. Maybe if it was all covered with jpg artifact pixels, a bad attempt to clone over someone else's logo, and a stupid faux-copyright mark, THEN people would think it was profound.

Now I want to open a business where I make people's ordinary status updates look like beloved Xerox lore from the early 90s.

O found it

https://theawl.com/the-triumphant-rise-of-the-shitpic-e25d8e5af9bc

A pristine-looking meme engenders skepticism — “This can’t be that funny, it hasn’t been imperfectly replicated enough.” But when you see that blurry text, partially cut off by the top of the frame, and a heavily compressed picture of Kermit below… that’s when you know: This is gonna be a good-ass meme.

this is also good along similar lines https://medium.com/message/god-tier-facebook-moms-run-the-meme-game-1e56ef0d31ec

I hadn't seen these coloured things before but I saw my first one today:

http://i.imgur.com/YmP23AB.jpg

Punch yourself in the face!