EXCELSIOR is the second solo album by British musician LOLZ Coombes.

people should be forced to give a 30 second warning before cumming

― Neanderthal, Monday, 6 February 2017 3:02 PM

ok, Sting

― flappy bird, Monday, 6 February 2017 3:33 PM

that's excessive and impossible to project accurately...like a cable company telling you theyll be there between 1 and 5 pm

― if young satchmo don't trumpet i'm gon shoot you (m bison), Monday, 6 February 2017 4:44 PM

impossible to project accurately

Not if you have good aim!

Ok, you're selling yourself short MatthewK. Obviously the hero of that whole exchange.

people should be forced to give a 30 second warning before cumming

― Neanderthal, Monday, 6 February 2017 3:02 PM

I do, it's called "foreplay".

― attention vampire (MatthewK), Monday, February 6, 2017 4:21 AM (five hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

MatthewK i love you

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, February 6, 2017 5:45 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

30 sec warning, Tracer

― attention vampire (MatthewK), Monday, February 6, 2017 5:51 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I don't feel anything yet

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, February 6, 2017 5:58 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's how I roll

― attention vampire (MatthewK), Monday, February 6, 2017 6:21 AM (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

(blushes)

today my boss stopped by my desk and asked if i liked the smash hit song tshirt and said i was fired if i didnt

― lag∞n, Wednesday, February 8, 2017 7:06 PM (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lmao

can't spell tshirt without hit

oh for this board to be so quiet again
― nashwan, Thursday, February 9, 2017

I am a little surprised that I am as sad that right now I can't, for example, look up the first time someone used the word "dickhole" on the site as I am.

― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), Tuesday, 7 February 2017 18:09 (three days ago) Permalink

google with the site: option

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=site%3Awww.ilxor.com+dickhole

is there more suitable term for the Japs Eye? - ilXor.com
www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=40...
22 Nov 2001 - 38 posts - ‎23 authors
HOT SAUCE IN THE DICK HOLE. HOT SAUCE IN THE DICK HOLE. HOT SAUCE IN THE DICK HOLE. HOT SAUCE IN THE DICK HOLE.

― koogs, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 19:13 (three days ago) Permalink

saw that and immediately heard Kanye hollering it in my head :/

filed to google image searches that provide unexpectedly absurd results

(not the all caps part. just 'kanye hot sauce')

http://i.imgur.com/jCCMaA9.png?1

http://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpghttp://i.imgur.com/HeQOs53.jpg

I hear it like "Hot Cheetos and Takis"

I keep scrolling that up and down hoping to get a row of all identical Kanyes, or perhaps cherries.

Haha. I did that today at work.

If Flynn is fired and then arrested/prosecuted, I imagine there is good chance he'd rat on others. That might explain Trump's current tightlippedness. He wants to play nice with Flynn and therefore is sort of backed into a corner.

― Josh in Chicago, Monday, February 13, 2017 9:33 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

-moby

― j., Monday, February 13, 2017 9:35 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

- bob moby

Guess an album, a tale in two parts:

dammit I am going to have to listen to this, aren't I
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:13 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dear god how long is this song
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:19 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I am at the beginning of track 2 and I think it is safe to say that I am not the target demographic for this.
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:21 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

who is?
― mookieproof, 15. februar 2017 19:22 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Someone who can hit the interlude in track 2 and not want to shake dude until he forms butter.
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:25 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

WHY IS THIS DIARY READING STILL GOING ON
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:27 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

... what is going on
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:32 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

like what are these songs even about and why are they so long and what is the purpose behind the structure and is there a point to this and where is God
― ornate orchestral arrangements (DJP), 15. februar 2017 19:37 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I kind of want to hear it badly now
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 16:50 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I feel like I've been listening to the 1st song for an hour at least, or maybe the whole thing is on a "replay 1" setting, I don't know.
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:24 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh okay here's a new song finally
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:31 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well, "finally"
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:31 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I was gonna say I don't completely hate it so far but here's the journalist interview bit, ugh
still kinda hoping this whole new style is a big joke
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:39 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I like track 4, hope he doesn't ruin it with another fucking interlude
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:47 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

spoke too soon
― Dinsdale, 15. februar 2017 21:47 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Hint: It's a two disc album. So far nobody has made it to disc two.

Bruce Hornsby's Greatest Hits

tl;dl

Campaign Speeches by DJ Trump

What would it take to get you guys to stop saying 'Mencius Moldbug'?

― how's life, Monday, 13 February 2017 12:50 (four days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Or to stop reading jk Rowling entirely

― Betsy DeVos Ayes (darraghmac), Monday, 13 February 2017 12:57 (four days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Be cool if there was a US president with just an oval of skin where the face should be, as smooth and featureless as an egg

― Houston John (Bananaman Begins), Friday, February 17, 2017 8:36 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

should've voted McMullin then

― frogbs, Friday, February 17, 2017 8:36 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

All seven planets in this system — TRAPPIST-1b, c, d, e, f, g and h — are similar in size to Earth and Venus, or slightly smaller. At least the innermost six are probably rocky in composition.

conspiracy theory - why is NASA covering up TRAPPIST-1a?

― Karl Malone, Wednesday, February 22, 2017 10:15 AM

TRAPPIST-1a is actually a beer

― mookieproof, Wednesday, February 22, 2017 10:16 AM

equal to 40 light beers imo

― Karl Malone, Wednesday, February 22, 2017 10:17 AM

hahaha

made the kirin run in 12 pabstsecs

I have, by a long and curious experience found out a means to wipe my bum. The most lordly, the most excellent, the most convenient that was ever seen. I have wiped my tail with a hen, with a cock, with a pullet, with a calf's skin, with a hare, with a pigeon, with a cormorant, with an attorney's bag, with a Montero, with a falconer's lure. But to conclude, I say and maintain that of all the torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest of the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.

― for sale: steve bannon waifu pillow (heavily soiled) (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 23 February 2017 07:54 (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Not sticking a goose up my nockhole

Sticking with washlet

― F♯ A♯ (∞), Thursday, 23 February 2017 08:18 (forty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

don't nock it 'til you've tried it

― for sale: steve bannon waifu pillow (heavily soiled) (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 23 February 2017 08:24 (thirty-five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm going to frame that one and hang it on my wall.

nice

the putt for eagle at the end is a great touch

I mean rabelais is doing all the work there otherwise

wgs

are we excelsioring book quotes now (xps)

book quotes in microsoft document writer format?

Yeah see what happened there is someone made Rabelais funny, it's much like what the pythons did for Gilliam

hey now, no docxing

rabelais is dece

so we'll allow him to enter our modern world

pdffft

Who is that Nordic metal guy who dresses up like some kind of orc creature? Flynn looks like that guy.

― Treeship, Sunday, March 5, 2017 9:37 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Can you be more specific?

― I want to change my display name (dan m), Sunday, March 5, 2017 9:45 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

apparently this is v bad

― a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Friday, March 10, 2017 2:45 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

word is that it sucks

― jason waterfalls (gbx), Friday, March 10, 2017 2:46 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i hear that it isn't good

― Milkwalker's World (Old Lunch), Friday, March 10, 2017 2:50 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

early reviews say it's a dud

― Lauren Schumer Donor (Phil D.), Friday, March 10, 2017 2:51 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i am given to understand that it is *poop emoji*

― im a male feminist, i have a fleshlight just to eat it out (bizarro gazzara), Friday, March 10, 2017 3:43 PM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i actually think Phil's post is where I start laughing the hardest

I was attending an open mic night tonight where one guy got up and sang a Berry song. After he finished and everyone clapped, the organiser guy shouted "yeah lets all applaud a paedophile."

To which mass confusion ensued where the bloke singing thought he was talking about him. lol

― PressAnarchyToContinue (Ste), Sunday, March 19, 2017 5:43 PM

I can pretty much visualize that in my head. It's perfect/horrible comedy.

lmao

Animals are better than kids because you can eat animals.

Your move, kid lovers

― The night before all about day (darraghmac), Monday, March 20, 2017 3:15 PM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You can eat kids

― Pengest & Corsa (Noodle Vague), Monday, March 20, 2017 3:17 PM (one minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if you eat a baby goat, all bases are covered

― Rachel Luther Queen (DJP), Monday, March 20, 2017 3:18 PM (one minute ago) Bookmark

Jesus cmon

Yeah, the second coming is well overdue...

deems doing his typical Kool-Aid man across ILX today i see

I've actually been attempting it the last day or two tbh but glad it's getting noticed 😎