i murdered a man a few years ago. he walked through my garden so i hit him with a spade! will i be caught? i shouldn't think so!
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Friday, 3 February 2017 12:35 (seven years ago) link
We can't bust heads like we used to. But we have our ways. One trick is to tell stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for m'shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we... oh yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. I didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...
― Neil S, Friday, 3 February 2017 12:35 (seven years ago) link
getting drunk IS fun btw
― Oh the pacmanity (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, 3 February 2017 14:03 (seven years ago) link
tbh he does have a point, drunkards like Churchill and other famous drunks never looked like they were having fun. the secret is drinking while not having fun, it seems.
― mh 😏, Friday, 3 February 2017 14:32 (seven years ago) link
tbf churchill wasn't exactly blessed with the kind of countenance that allowed for traditionally-agreed-upon expressions of 'fun'
― for sale: steve bannon waifu pillow (heavily soiled) (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 3 February 2017 15:12 (seven years ago) link
no cars back then, and the average height was three foot six, so we used to ride dogs everywhere until they fell over dead from overwork. piles of dead dogs there were, lining the cobbled streets, and the little orphan urchins used to suck out their eyes for the protein, 'jelly e'en' we used to call them, i can still taste them now. you wouldn't get those in your newfangled spars, i'll tell you, and more's the pity
― for sale: steve bannon waifu pillow (heavily soiled) (bizarro gazzara), Friday, February 3, 2017 7:21 AM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
biggest irl lol of the year so far, thank you for this
― Wimmels, Sunday, 5 February 2017 17:08 (seven years ago) link
If Labour wants to win back its Brexit-voting heartlands, it needs to help resurrect the 'working class identity'When my dad spoke to me about his childhood, he’d talk of working men’s clubs as major social institutions. Twice a year, the club would organise trips to Blackpool or Skegness. They’d book out two carriages on the local train, and the children would get pop and crisps on the way there and a stick of rock on the way back
Joe Todd 2 hours ago 54 commentshttp://www.independent.co.uk/voices/labour-brexit-jeremy-corbyn-heartlands-trade-unions-working-class-identity-a7589391.html
― nashwan, Monday, 20 February 2017 14:16 (seven years ago) link
we'd go to blackpool every year. october of course, for the illuminations. stroll on the promenade, peruse a ribald postcard or two. chips on the pier and then to the abc for a few chuckles at the antics of our pakistani friends, and paddies. now my grandson goes with the other emos, in february as if that made a lick of sense. he tells me it's "ironic". brought me back a stick of rock with the word "non-binary" through it.
― Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 20 February 2017 14:52 (seven years ago) link
the train would leave one station, arriving at various stations along the way, where it would stop to let passengers alight. it wasn't a perfect system, but it worked better than today's.
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Monday, 20 February 2017 15:15 (seven years ago) link
i've actually been on one of those Blackpool trips, i'm not sure if it was the first time i'd travelled by train but it was v exciting as a kid. not sure if it built much of a sense of community because as far as i remember our fam sat in our own compartment and i don't remember actually mingling with anybody else on the trip
― Treesh-Hurt (Noodle Vague), Monday, 20 February 2017 15:45 (seven years ago) link
i bought a bootleg copy of zooropa on the beach in blackpool
― jason waterfalls (gbx), Monday, 20 February 2017 15:55 (seven years ago) link
real england
― for sale: steve bannon waifu pillow (heavily soiled) (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 20 February 2017 15:57 (seven years ago) link
Was reminiscing with my dad recently about a family trip to Blackpool where for the whole 6 hour round trip and more or less the whole time there I listened to the 2nd manics album on repeat, presumably on my Sony sports walkman. Peak teenager for me. Inspired by my dad having bought himself the greatest hits CD which idk I'm sure that says something.
― Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 20 February 2017 16:21 (seven years ago) link
european civilization has been in stasis since socrates had to defend his life in front of the athenian 'parliament'. meanwhile, donald trump golfs every weekend
― reggie (qualmsley), Wednesday, 26 April 2017 23:11 (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Beautiful
― virginity simple (darraghmac), Thursday, 27 April 2017 00:36 (seven years ago) link
https://twitter.com/MENnewsdesk/status/857356846520311808
nult is that you
― r|t|c, Tuesday, 2 May 2017 10:28 (seven years ago) link
i read a piece about spice in the MEN recently and it was very much this thread type stuff, but on the other hand i had never heard of "spice" so it was sort of surprising or shocking. really seems a big growing story, all these people getting spiced out of their minds.
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 10:38 (seven years ago) link
Quoting for posterity Amid a sea of filth, a cardboard box in the shape of a person that hints at a tragic way of life and death
― your cognitive privilege (El Tomboto), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 11:15 (seven years ago) link
If Gaspar Noe did christmas cards...
― calzino, Tuesday, 2 May 2017 11:22 (seven years ago) link
That human beings can be living in such conditions may seem obscene in a first world country
always like the "in a first world country" qualifier, like in a developing country obviously squalor is no big deal
― The Real Remoaner (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:06 (seven years ago) link
well yeah tbh.
― virginity simple (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:08 (seven years ago) link
I would suggest the fact of there being more of it is not the same as it being nbd
― The Real Remoaner (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:11 (seven years ago) link
its not the more of it its the 'could be worse, could be better' comparators
these days kids in the first world are spoilt when i were a lad we had one mobile phone between us and twere only for business now venezuelans are on twitter all day instead of making my trainers
― virginity simple (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:25 (seven years ago) link
I think if you stop the sentence at obscene you take nothing away from its intent and perhaps look a wee bit less of a douche
― The Real Remoaner (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:27 (seven years ago) link
we can all agree
― virginity simple (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 May 2017 12:42 (seven years ago) link
maybe a desperate attempt to wring a tiny drop of empathy out of ppl
― Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 2 May 2017 13:18 (seven years ago) link
Movie Based on a Tweet Is Actually Happening
― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 22 May 2017 23:08 (seven years ago) link
we all end up with the boss baby we deserve
― mh, Monday, 22 May 2017 23:12 (seven years ago) link
BOSS Baby the baby is an apartheid south africa secret policeman
― The Adventures Of Whiteman (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 23 May 2017 09:32 (seven years ago) link
https://www.theguardian.com/sport/blog/2017/oct/20/cricket-is-rotting-destroyed-icc-ecb-t20-test-matches
"cricket is rotting away. everything worthwhile about it is being destroyed"
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Friday, 20 October 2017 15:18 (six years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DMl3RMiU8AAgsGX.jpg
― lag∞n, Friday, 20 October 2017 15:51 (six years ago) link
"we used to ogle women with honour"
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Friday, 20 October 2017 16:03 (six years ago) link
lol that is some spectacular handwringing from engel
― imago, Friday, 20 October 2017 16:07 (six years ago) link
when i was a boy it was an honor and a privilege to shoot poor people of color in the head both here and abroad. everything has gone topsy turvy.
― scott seward, Friday, 20 October 2017 16:17 (six years ago) link
pay-off line of this SJenkins screed is in the spirit of this threadhttps://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/nov/24/irish-border-hard-brexit-ireland
― Neil S, Friday, 24 November 2017 12:20 (six years ago) link
democracy has clocked off early and downed a few gallons of budget booze
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Friday, 24 November 2017 12:22 (six years ago) link
Democracy, where is?
― Neil S, Friday, 24 November 2017 12:24 (six years ago) link
Any sort of border in Ireland, whether physical or regulatory, is politically impossible and publicly unpopular. That’s bad news for hard Brexiteers
yeah because Ireland is always at the front of those lads' minds
― who says no to mentals? (Noodle Vague), Friday, 24 November 2017 12:55 (six years ago) link
No results found for "what is the point of simon jenkins?"
― who says no to mentals? (Noodle Vague), Friday, 24 November 2017 13:04 (six years ago) link
when i first moved to the UK i really liked him but now i realize it was only ever because of his gratifyingly scornful arguments against military action in iraq. they were good columns to have written but they did unfortunately trick me into reading his other stuff :/
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 24 November 2017 13:07 (six years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjJDekSculo
― The buttermilk of Beelzebub (Tom D.), Friday, 24 November 2017 13:18 (six years ago) link
Before they could confiscate our sound system we would rave in the woods/warehouse. Everyone turned up to dance until sunlight and didn't even know who was playing at what time. We would dance to whatever was played and enjoy it. Pure positive vibes. The internet ruined it.— HUD (UK) (@Hudskov) November 30, 2017
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Saturday, 2 December 2017 10:17 (six years ago) link
I remember when you had to call a Phone Number only a handful knew and form a convoy to follow "someone" who knew, to a venue "somewhere" to listen to "somebody". If they were actually the names on the flyers, BONUS!!! #BetterDays 🎶🎶🎶— paul donaghy (@phax71) November 30, 2017
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Saturday, 2 December 2017 10:18 (six years ago) link
I miss not knowing what a tune is for years and eventually stumbling across it in some random record shop. Music isn’t cherished anymore !— Insomniax (@insomniax_dnb) November 30, 2017
and we miss the days when the DJ just played the records 👊— DarrenW (@dwoodyatt) November 30, 2017
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Saturday, 2 December 2017 10:20 (six years ago) link
And we danced 🙌— DarrenW (@dwoodyatt) November 30, 2017
The days where you just turned up and danced all night without a care in the world (until the journey home)— riptide (@riptidehardcore) November 30, 2017
No internet, or camera phones in those days! Months to hunt a record, I made vinyl DJ mixes on audio cassette and sent them in the post to promoters and printed magazines. It was simple, if the music was good then you were involved! No what you look like/dress like/followers etc!— Rayees (@rayeesmusic) November 30, 2017
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Saturday, 2 December 2017 10:21 (six years ago) link
the fact that you can even recall on a day when the scene was like that is a blessing. Be grateful you’ve been at this level for this long! The little guys like us are so jealous!— tvrnstyle (@NickPetTree) November 30, 2017
exclamation marks! when talking about something that doesn't happen today!
― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Saturday, 2 December 2017 10:26 (six years ago) link
they make you hear the words! in a strange bemused angry voice!