The dying days of the Fourth Reich: it's the 2007 AUSTRALIAN FEDERAL ELECTION

http://www.cecaust.com.au//images/2007/vic/Colin_Horn.jpg

^Scariest

EDITORIAL RECOMMENDATION FUN

Daily Telegraph: Labor
SMH: Labor
Courier Mail: Labor
Australian: Labor (?!?!?!!?!!?!?!?!?!?!!?!!!)
Herald Scum: Coalition
Age: Undecided (?!?!?!?!?!!!)
Westralian: Coalition

the minutes crawl by...

Centrebet:

Labor $1.22
Coalition $4.35

According to Sportingbet CEO Michael Sullivan, the only reason they stop there is that there's no real gain in putting money on Labor when you'll only win $1.22 for each dollar. It fluctuates occasionally when some nutter whacks a princely sum on the Coalition simply because the winning would be enormous.

In other words, PWND

I mean seriously, that's some ridiculous odds there.

Add to that the fact that all 300-odd polls since March show a Labor win (even today's weird 52/48 Galaxy poll showing a counter-intuitive Coalition gain*) and Labor's all over this thang.

* don't worry, today's Nielsen is more reliable and shows a 57/43 split to Labor, which is a massive 24-seat win

OKAY I AM IMPATIENT NOW.

You guys have got to see the websites this morning.

ABC: "Labor still ahead on election eve"
SMH: "Howard needs a miracle"
Age: "It's time, say voters"
Herald Scum: "Photo finish" (deluded, honestly)
Telegraph: "Half a chance" (meaning Howard)

(I left off some states because the websites are not responding)

What I hope to be happening tomorrow (drawn during a dull staff meeting)
http://home.iprimus.com.au/jrsmorrison/Images/Howardsmall.jpg

That's rather good for something idly drawn in a staff meeting!

It was a loooooooong meeting.

Hahah thats worthy of a panel in the Age! :)

111 Kirribilli is still up on the Domain website - amazing.

http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/news/national/kirribilli-house-up-for-sale/2007/11/22/1195321935673.html

^^totes jocular.

jocular.

Mr Wolpe said there had been no requests to pull the advertisement.

!!! So theyre fully aware of it at Fairfax. AWESOME!

I think I'm going to be very maudlin if Labor don't win.

I'm going to be extremely baffled and want to know what thehell is going on, man.

The polls are confusing, especially that galaxy one. I don't think I've ever cared so much about the outcome.

Yeah I assume everyone who has posted on this thredd will be bummed if Labor loses. Although I couldn't care less if my Labor mp loses. She is idiot.

My local labor MP is incumbent and pretty likely to win - he's been the MP for port phillip for f'never. And like, sif St Kilda would ever vote Liberal ffs.

Galaxy is duff, Kate.

I will be totally fucking pissed off if Labor doesn't win.

Well up until the last 24 hours I was thinking about buying some booze to celebrate the new government Saturday night...now I am worried I'll just be drinking...to forget.

there's a dan kelly song just for that occasion.. "drunk on election night" - it's about the 2004 election and uses very colourful language to describe the libs..

I haven't been drunk since New Years Eve 2006. I think, to quote the 1972 Whitlam campaign: It's Time.

to quote the 1972 Whitlam campaign:

There's been a lot of that.

Just hope it goes the same way....you know, without the dismissal.

Yesterday my loopy right-wing father-in-law said "I don't mind Kevin Rudd."

THIS IS PROOF LOOK IT IS IN THE PUDDING.

xpost Yer. I don't trust Howard to not pull a stunt like that, so hopefully the little fuck retires instantly.

Gerard Henderson of the shady Sydney Institute has predicted a Coalition win with 45% of the two party preferred vote. um, wtf??

Howard senses a win for the Coalition

In other news, Daryl Somers challenges Kate Ceberano to a sing-off.

I mean fucking REALLY.

Coalition ministers will begin to snap any minute now. Watch for it. A big giant enormous fuck-off snap of the highest order.

Today (and tomorrow) you'll see loads of reports like this claiming the result will be "too close to call" and that votes will have to be recounted etc. This is always asserted and never transpires. Don't believe them.

Look at this, from AM this morning:

CHRIS UHLMANN: It's no good having a beautiful set of numbers and a nice unemployment rate Prime Minister, if you fear that you might lose your job tomorrow. It doesn't matter what the national economy looks like.

JOHN HOWARD: Forget about my job.

CHRIS UHLMANN: Not your job Prime Minister.

Fuck's sake! Seriously what a cunt.

I dunno, I'm nervous about the Galaxy poll. It was the closest poll to the actual result in 2004. A 48/52 two party preferred swing to Labor is unlikely be enough to cut it.

i'm not going to be not nervous until the results are in. haha, last night i kept dreaming about the election and the words 'autumn almanac', as written text, were woven through all my dreams.

Planning to be our election night commentator, Almy?

Meanwhile...

http://africa.reuters.com/odd/news/usnSYD148007.html

a bit, okay completely, off-topic: once i had a dream that i saw moley and mully sitting in a small car with a huge old black and white tv set balanced across both of their laps. their faces were obscured, probably because i didn't know what they looked like, but it was definitely them. it was most curious.

Bizarre.

..I was going to post this terrible joke about Kevin Rudd that got sent around the office, but I've decided I'll spare you guys.

is it funny?

I expect to find it funny.

a bit, okay completely, off-topic: once i had a dream that i saw moley and mully sitting in a small car with a huge old black and white tv set balanced across both of their laps. their faces were obscured, probably because i didn't know what they looked like, but it was definitely them. it was most curious.

-- estela

I think I can interpret this one. You perceive us both as poor (small car), old fashioned (b/w TV) and pretty much side by side on most issues, and even taking the same road in life. On all counts, your unconscious is correct.

Ok ok I'll succumb to yours guyses persistent pleadings, here it is.

And note it was prefixed with 'I'm with Little Johnny!'

Subject: Fw: Tragedy

KEVIN RUDD was visiting a primary school and he visited one of
the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and
their meanings.
The teacher asked MR. RUDD if he would like to lead the discussion
on the word "tragedy".
So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a "tragedy".
1 little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm,
is playing in the field & a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would
be a "tragedy."
No," said RUDD"that would be an accident."
A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying fifty
children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a
tragedy."
"I'm afraid not," explained MR. RUDD"that's what we would call
great loss."
The room went silent. No other children volunteered.
RUDD searched the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an
example of a tragedy?"
Finally, at the back of the room, little Johnny raised his hand...
In a quiet voice he said: "If A plane carrying you and Mrs RUDD was
struck by a "friendly fire" missile & blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."
"Fantastic!" exclaimed RUDD. "That's right. And can you tell me why that
would be tragedy?"
"Well," says the boy "it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn't
be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be a f#!@ing accident either!"

Sorry I wasted your time :(

lol, i like the censoring at the end, there is something so extravagant-looking about # in a word.

moley, i think the car was an old classic kind of small car, like a morris minor or something, of the same era as the tv.

gaz once said he imagined me as a very small peruvian woman who wore pearls.

Gold.

Tim F: Going by what psephologists are saying, that was luck. It's important to note that the Galaxy poll is the outlier in the five polls being released today/tomorrow (the other four showing a clean Labor win).

estela: ahahaha oh dear.

moley: I plan to be too drunk to type.

Commentating on the election sober would be un-Australian.

Well, estela, regarding the classic Morris Minor car: of course gaz and I are classic, that goes without saying, and rather eccentric in an English way. So the car is perfect. In fact, it's what my parents drove when I was a kid.

gaz once said he imagined me as a very small peruvian woman who wore pearls.

-- estela

Ha! I imagine you as a tiny slip of a thing with very white skin and a penchant for Elizabethan love poetry. I haven't decided what colour your hair is.

I also imagine electric sound jim to be swarthily handsome, with black rimmed glasses and a strong jaw. Correct me if I'm wrong.

http://africa.reuters.com/odd/news/usnSYD148007.html

Africa, wtf?

I think me and my bf should spend the day writing death metal anthems to celebrate the changing of the guard. Y/N.

Y

I imagine Sasha to be thin, with longish grey-blond hair, and not dissimilar in appearance to Thurston Moore or Julian Cope.