Star Wars Anthology shit talk (Rogue One, Young Solo, TBD)

Forest Whitaker is as terrible as Natalie Portman

http://jalopnik.com/lets-geek-out-over-all-the-fascinating-technology-used-1790293003

Surprised nobody gets the no-network design principle that explains most of the silliness

Instead of putting a password on the file they just rack the tape up in a hard-to-get-to room that you can fall a long way down in

Oh also, could NONE of the grizzled old saboteurs have been women? Or any of the main cast besides Jyn? The X-wing pilot was great to see but otherwise the gender balance in this movie is reeeeeally bad.

It's a good thing the Empire had land lines!

Reach out and DEATH someone

All the women we see that aren't combat pilots are bosses though

I didn't notice if many of the other people in Saw's cabal were human

The brain squid was probably a lady

finally, a breakthrough for the representation of lady brain squids in cinema

TOMBOT'S original post:

Felicity Jones
Mads Mikkelsen
Ben Mendelsohn
Alan Tudyk
Donnie Yen
Forest Whitaker
Diego Luna

these already look like Star Wars character names.

takes one to know one

General Soto to you, deck officer

The Irishman, Robert De Niro’s highly anticipated reunion with Martin Scorsese, will be receiving an added dash of nostalgia, according to producer Gaston Pavlovich. In an interview with Cinema Blend’s Gregory Wakeman, Pavlovich confirmed that Scorsese’s in-development project will employ the CGI technology recently used to recreate the late Peter Cushing's character Grand Moff Tarkin in Rogue One, in order to de-age De Niro for certain segments of the movie. The goal is to have him look as he did back in his “The Godfather 2 days.”

"You don’t use prosthetics, make-up, they have acting and the technology is able to have them go through different time ages without the prosthetics,” Pavlovich told Wakeman. “We were able to film Bob and just do a scene, and we saw it come down to when he was like 20, 40, 60, so we’re looking forward to that, from that point of view, for The Irishman.”

The movie, which also has Al Pacino (and, maybe, Joe Pesci) attached to star, is a crime drama centered on Frank Sheeran, the man who—on his deathbed—claimed to have murdered Jimmy Hoffa. The film is based on the Charles Brandt novel I Heard You Paint Houses, and—not unlike many other Scorsese projects—has been in the works for a while, with Deadline first reporting the casting of Pesci and Pacino way back in 2010. And it should be noted that it’s likely we’ll see those two actors made to look younger as well: A year ago, DeNiro revealed the technology was being tried out on “the other actors, too.”

http://birthmoviesdeath.com/2016/12/21/rogue-one-film-crit-hulk-the-slippery-sloping-story-of-rogue-one

How can I really care about a master switch that was introduced just two seconds prior? It's like trying to learn chemistry on the fly as you take the test. Again, none of it is "offensive" to a casual viewer; it's just so much less effective than it could be. If it had even an ounce of deeper dramatic understanding, the whole sequence could have been amazing. And in the end, this lack of clarity and stakes horrifically betrays the emotion/characterization of all the characters' sacrificing moments. To be clear, I liked the stylization of a lot of them, and even some of the mantras behind them, but because of the larger objective sequencing I can't help but feel like every single one of their sacrifices should have meant more, especially in terms of the dramatic integration of the actual heist...

Grand Moff De Niro

when did Film Crit Hulk drop the schtick?

After Election Day.

Really.

trump smash hulk

so was "this is a 'stand-alone' Star Wars movie" a cover story or a hilarious joke?

is someone talking

I feel bad for people who went to this movie expecting some kind of female-led space opera Ocean's Dirty Dozen - oh wait I mean hang on what did people think they were going to?

The weird ethnic casting bothered me a bit, i.e. "Let's cast actors who look like the citizens of countries from which we want to extract mega profits!"

harrumph, much better when this exact practice took the form of all white dudes all the time

ARE. YOU. HERE...TO KILL...ME?

the worst Forest perf i have seen is, of course, his Oscar-winning turn as Idi Amin

i wonder what the heck an "extremist" in this rebellion looks like. does he stage terrorist attacks on imperial civilian populations or what? our heroes end up being a bunch of freedom-fighter saboteurs and assassins, right? is it just that he is willing to use the terrible octobrain in his interrogations?

IIRC, Saw has been openly assaulting the Empire's military operations for years at this point - there's a line about his outfit hitting the Kyber crystal shipments, which is apparently way too overt for the rebellion at this particular stage. That's why the debate later revolves around "talk to the Senate (more)" vs "begin blowing shit up immediately"

overall it's fine but kinda disappointing because it gets so close to being really great.

sarcasm aside I do genuinely feel bad when people go to a movie and come away with this feeling. I was glad to have a couple of "meh" reviews under my belt to temper my excitement going in, I think it actually helped me have a lot more fun. I even liked the joke when they put the hood on the blind guy.

i haven't read many of the takes on this but i thought this was vv good. some very minor issues, but i loved its look and its variety of different worlds and settings. i didn't mind the callbacks or the CGI Cushing and Fisher. liked the nods to Red Leader and Gold Leader (but where are thou, porkins??), loved the FX, the use of crippled star destroyers to open the shield was some sweet space action, really enjoyed the cast overall. Whitaker was his usual oddball self but for a paranoid fringe lunatic character i thought it worked.

i guess the final (admittedly fantastic) space battle seemed to be a cover version of the final battle in Return of the Jedi. Multiple nods to it, which i noticed. it didn't diminish things for me. i always like seeing fish admirals fucking up the imperial fleet.

also, i suspect based on my memory of the conversation between Leia and Vader at the beginning of Ep IV that the events at the end of this film involving her don't quite line up logically w/her denials and Vader's line of questioning. I could be wrong. I had always imagined that there was a lot more subterfuge and secrecy as opposed to a huge Imperial-base destroying fight immediately preceding things. it's not a huge deal for me, it doesn't remove some of the mystery and enjoyment the way the events of eps 1-3 did.

You were on a diplomatic mission? Dude, you were blowing shit up around our tropical planet base just 5 minutes ago!

I explained that incongruency away in my head as the rebels basically rehashing their usual traffic stop talking points because they don't have anything better

"You just fled the scene of the first major Rebel-on-Empire space battle, and you stole the Death Star plans, and I saw you do it"
"I don't know what you're talking about officer this is a diplomatic vessel, we're all diplomats here"
"Also you just shot a bunch of my men when we came on board"
"Diplomatic cargo sir, diplomacy stuff, nobody here but us diplomats"

i can't believe how eye-rolley people are about cg leia. my favorite five seconds of the movie.

I disagree with their premise. I thought this one succeeded specifically *because* of all the connections to A New Hope. Whereas The Force Awakens felt redundant, because it *was* A New Hope.

yeah ... this does not bode well for non-prequels, imo. nor does the fact that my second-favorite scene was hallway vader. and i say this as someone who cringed often during TFA fan service.

not sure what rian has up his sleeve but it better be good, adam driver can't provide the new direction the series needs all on his own.

one complaint - the way things went down it wasn't clear that riz's sacrifice meant anything. maybe it didn't? you can't tell me him plugging that cable into the little cargo ship had shit to do with the giant satellite dish uploading the plans to dropbox.

Isn't that the action that allows them to talk to the fleet and say "open the shield now"?

Not that "open the shield" could be that far down the list of tactical goals.

was Saw even necessary to the plot? That section introduced the gang but not much else. Could have cut the film by 20 minutes.

one complaint - the way things went down it wasn't clear that riz's sacrifice meant anything. maybe it didn't? you can't tell me him plugging that cable into the little cargo ship had shit to do with the giant satellite dish uploading the plans to dropbox.

I thought the fate of his character was the first gotcha. He's back on the ship, transmission sent, home free, right? Then the shore trooper chucks one right into the open door.

Some weird tactical stuff going on in that beachhead cover shooter sequence. You pretty much just had dudes with rifles only blasting away at each other, right? Are grenades only allocated to whoever's playing the grenadier class on the imperial/rebel side? What's a standard trooper loadout?

That's one of the interesting bits I dig about having Wen Jiang there, as we haven't had an armored heavy weapons guy yet, correct? Chewbacca pretty much just had a semi-automatic bowcaster.

Wish they woulda spent 5 minute or something more just on characterization, as I don't even remember their names, much less identifying traits.

I remember all of them

*touches the face of rogue one memorial, drags finger across Blue Leader, Red Five, Chirrut Imwe, Baez Malbus, Bodhi Rook...*

Body Rock.

They had to go to Saw to get the video message, right? What is not clear, and I suppose there's a whole bunch of stuff that is not clear, is what Saw was planning to do with the information. Maybe he was just extremely ... lazy.

They went to Saw for help getting contact with her father. The message arriving there was just lucky timing, I think.

They had word that someone had gone to Saw with a message from Mads. I can't remember how on earth they heard that, but that was the idea. Saw had the message but hadn't decided what to do with it, since he thought it might be bogus. He'd at least confirmed, via the brain squid, that Vaughn Bode was not lying, but I guess after that he was like, 'shit... but that tells me nothing about whether Mads is lying, why did I even bother?' Man this is needlessly complicated though. I guess they were working extra hard to disguise the New Hope hologram-delivery business, or invert expectations or sth. On paper, ''what if Obi Wan had been a paranoid old guerilla, survivor of too many traps and assassination attempts, who tortured Luke and then refused to believe Leia?'' is maybe kinda interesting but they didn't execute it very well and just jamming it into an already crowded first act was probably not ever going to work.

They heard about Bodhi defecting and learned he was headed for Saw (Galen's only contact he could trust).

So the Captain is sent with Jyn to get the details from Saw so that he can find and kill Galen; because they don't understand yet what the Death Star is or that it's already complete.

People all remembering how ice cold it was that Capt Andor shoots his crazy informant in his first scene but forgetting why he was there in the first place

It seems like Sam's part was cut down or changed quite a bit in the reshoots

Me back in April: Also does anybody else think they cast FW basically just to be the guy who says the trailer stuff? I bet you he has one scene and we just saw most of it

Well if so then the reshoots made me mostly right, therefore hooray reshoots

funny that in decades of Star Wars films, the last two are the first that actually have Imperial motherfuckers defecting.

looking forward to when Kylo Ren switches teames in the next one.

Yeah but realistically how did the guy who told Andor come by this information? Did Bodhi go around telling all his stormtrooper buddies ''hey peace out, Mads Mikkelsen's a traitor and I have a secret message from him to Saw Ferreira?'' It's just a really contrived plot IMO.

You guys pining for the days of over-explanation from the Lucas prequels lol

maybe they'll make a movie explaining how the Bodhi defection information was acquired

Bodhi went to a trading post and started asking around about how to find Saw Gerrera. Word gets out.
The dialogue explains pretty much all of this.

Here's the War is Boring review (warning: prose bad)
https://warisboring.com/rogue-one-shows-us-the-dark-side-of-the-rebellion-d6aebf38bf6e#.eo75nbkc8

"you guys" = not me! I got it all the first time thanks

there was also an APB for Bodhi on Jedha too with his actual likeness - which made it kind of funny to me that he shows up on Skariff and nobody recognizes him when he comes on board for the inspection. but w/e, they were all ready to blast away anyway.

I still love the reaction of the derpy Imperial employee who gets asked to comb through his records:

"ALL of them?"

so Droopy-esque.

You guys pining for the days of over-explanation from the Lucas prequels lol

― Nhex, Thursday, December 22, 2016 8:59 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nah, fuq that. much of the original trilogy wouldn't hold up to close scrutiny either, but frankly who gives a shit

I mean the universe-building is swiss cheese and succumbs immediately to any attack of logic, like all space opera, but the reasons why people go places and talk to other characters are all pretty well explained imo

Yeah honestly the plotty stuff is only distracting to me where the story isn't working as a story (momentum, character arcs, emotional investment, tension and release). The prequels are actually Exhibit A here - it's a real fucking boring story and so virtually every scene I can find myself getting distracted by how much the minute-to-minute plotting makes no sense. Yeah, the big picture stuff is gratuitous over-explanation but that's not what I'm talking about here.

Plus, there's plenty here that I'm sure is 'explained in the dialogue' but, as with the whole master switch confusion, that's not really the problem - it's that things have been made unnecessarily complicated and the story itself has stopped working. Film Crit Hulk is OTM about the third act problems (tho IMO that was still the strongest chunk of the movie and he's way off about the first act).

looking forward to when Kylo Ren switches teames in the next one.

― Neanderthal, Thursday, December 22, 2016

and blows Luke.