people that YELP are scumbags

http://m.motherjones.com/environment/2015/08/i-cant-stop-reading-these-one-star-yelp-reviews-national-parks

every third review she mentions she's a working actress on Broadway: https://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=syAen08LssjEY1XmU9Xesg

Now , I perform for a living , soo I'm really Particular where I go , when I'm Not performing , or when I finish performing, or when I just want to get the bloody fook out, & have a great bloody time.

she gave 5 stars to a dominos pizza

when I just want to get the bloody fook out, & have a great bloody time.

is it Daphne from Frasier?

Ollo Ollo Luvvys. Bloody "ell mates.

yelpsy welpsy

This person is clearly not actually British, FFS. My money's on WGW.

This is an under rated place. Too hard to get reservations.

re that broadway performer yelp reviewer: In 2009, the Guinness World Record for longest sword swallowed was achieved by Natasha Veruschka with a 58 cm (22.83 in) long sword.

Rude staff. They hold your credit card at the bar. Which is very strange and I believe against the law. It was my first time here and won't come back. I had to ask for the credit card and the bartender would not give me back. I had to use a stronger tone and got my card back after much back and forth argument with the bartender. Won't recommend this place to anyone.

Wow they will be extremely grumpy when they go to every other bar on earth.

yelpers are really good at being completely bewildered by standard practices and procedures. cf. the gushing, died-and-gone-to-heaven reviews of bookstores with a recommendation wall, and the vicious takedowns of movie theaters with overpriced candy and snacks. OUTRAGEOUS

http://i.imgur.com/IsNZFPw.jpg

https://twitter.com/SynKami/status/790583060693561344

shop cats are the best

although I might not eat those cookies sat out in the open in the bottom-right of picture

(PS I would totally still eat those cookies but maybe they ought to put them a bit higher up or behind a counter I guess)
(PPS this is not legal advice and I am not a qualified health code inspector)

Wow they will be extremely grumpy when they go to every other bar on earth.

OK I have to admit I too have never heard of this practice of the bar keeping your credit card but I looked it up and I see it's a thing. I think it's because if I'm drinking at a bar I am pretty much always actually sitting at the bar so in that situation I guess there's no reason for them to fear you walking out on the tab?

where I'm at now, it's becoming a thing of the past. lots of bartenders now will just scan your card, then hand it back once it's fed into their system. but I still go to quite a few that keep it too, doesn't really bother me.

the cookies are wrapped in plastic. the cat is adorable.

yes and yes and yes.

shop cats also are a nice alternative to shop rats

also that taking the credit card thing has happened to me every time I've done a tab at an american bar

or a canadian one

I was stunned and confused the first time a bartender didn't hold my credit card.

that is a perfect cat and that person sucks

I always feel awkward for those 20 seconds where you're not sure if they're keeping your card or not, cos if you bolt they run you down to hand you your card, and if you stand there they go "can oy help yoo?"

a thing you can do is ask if they're going to keep your card

in the typical 100 decibel bar here, good luck

the drink orders themselves take lip-reading or repeating usually

UDPATE:
http://i.amz.mshcdn.com/YlVBmEAcj3bsh7P6IKcsQIMUQSU=/fit-in/1200x9600/https%3A%2F%2Fblueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fuploads%2Fcard%2Fimage%2F261300%2FScreen_Shot_2016-10-26_at_3.38.46_PM.png

this bodega cat issue seems like buzzfeed mania to support lengthy trolling over her dumb online post imo.
kinda want social media pile on to stop so i can get back to petting cats

imo you underestimate the love people have for their local bodega cats

Last time I was here, it was before I developed a palate, one that is of a food critic!

This time, I'm laying the hammer down after what I have tasted.

The lunch special combo of Chicken Teriyaki and Gyoza was not good. The chicken was grilled perfectly, but the teriyaki sauce was way too salty! Teriyaki is supposed to be sweet, not Morton-like! I think I'm going to call them Mortonyaki. It was a plus when they have their salad dressing on the table with the condiments, so that I can squeeze the sauce into the meal, as the dressing has some sweet goodness to it. The salad had no flavor; it didn't matter if I squeezed anymore salad dressing into it, the salad just eats up the flavor. The gyoza was good and crispy. Rice was hard and because of that difficult to swallow.

Oh yeah, the coke was good.

Didn't do the restroom drill, so don't know if it is clean though.

Place that I can say bye-bye!

btw for the record the "salad" he's referring to is literally plain iceberg lettuce, which is served on the side of basically every single teriyaki meal...so he's critiquing their plain lettuce for not having flavor. but at least their coke was okay.

you're not supposed to actually eat the salad at a teriyaki place, it's decorative

"I developed a palate, one that is of a food critic!"

I developed a grammar, one that is of a writer person!

"I developed a bag, one that is of scum!"

I developed a tumor, one that is of a dying person

I always say no salad when I order teriyaki, that way they give you more rice - just a handy trick I developed, one that is of a person who lives in Seattle

I'm too lazy to say no salad

I usually eat it! Especially if its shredded coleslaw which it often is.

what is a "teriyaki place"?

they dip the whole store in a giant bowl of sauce

possibly a sexual euphemism

xpost

Sounds like Hawaiian bbq but lettuce instead of macaroni?

I've passed by this place many times, but haven't tried it, probably never will

http://teriyakimadness.com/

I am definitely feeling the madness

what is a "teriyaki place"?

A teriyaki shop is a counter-service restaurant that sells chicken teriyaki and assorted other things, like for instance spicy chicken, katsu chicken, chicken and gyoza, maybe some other proteins or preparations. It comes with rice and salad from a bag with some indistinct white dressing on it. They're all over the place in Seattle, they're good.

Urgh that teriaki madness chain looks dreadful.

Come for the teriyaki, stay for the brain devouring micro-organisms.