mayo: the devil's condiment

aimless is the mayonnaise of ilx

daaaaaaamn

mayonnaise is just one tiny part of a universe of edible and sometimes attractive foods and condiments I consume. my life in no way revolves around it. otoh, mayo-hatred seems to be very, uh, highly motivating to a small segment of ilxors.

my life more or less revolves around mayo. no shame in my game.

I won't say I'm a mayonist, but I'm mayo-friendly.

aimless is the mayonnaise of ilx

Rude!

yet creamy

And good with turkeys.

otoh, mayo-hatred seems to be very, uh, highly motivating to a small segment of ilxors.

look if yall were smearing rheum on your toast and saying how delightful it was I think there'd be a number of people who felt motivated to say "fuckin', no"

I used to call it semennaise but stopped because I don't want to associate something lovely with the gunge that is the devil's condiment

I'll take that as being pro-mayo?

...smearing rheum on your toast and saying how delightful it was I think there'd be a number of people...

I guess we'll find out if you're right soon enough, or at least soon enough to suit me.

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-08-04/food-startup-ran-undercover-project-to-buy-up-its-own-products

lol at this whole thing

especially the idea of vegan mayo

I mean, really

Just had a mayo epiphany. Only alleged foodstuff that becomes more gross the bigger the container is?

Marmite, maybe? I love both, so have no idea what you're all talking about.

xpost

You may want to consider refrigeration

https://c1.staticflickr.com/6/5573/14757374848_decc2472d2_b.jpg

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/8d/c2/91/8dc2915a0f6ec6dc64318a39e0a29a34.jpg

jesus christ hot mayonnaise mixed with eggs barrrrrrrf

satan is real

also i dunno if anyone in the history of condiments has ever described mayonnaise as being 'light and delicate'

i'm beginning to suspect hellman's marketing department was infiltrated by deranged pranksters sometime in the 70s and it took a while for anyone to notice

can we talk about the cheese cones for a minute

i'd really rather not if that's okay with you

that thread's over here

Completely disgusting foods our parents ate

a cheese/mayonnaise faux-pine cone quietly melting on a side table during a festive gathering

slowly spreading like an oil slick across the serving dish, lapping against the carrot slices

its unholy egg/dairy scent hanging spectre-like over the room

the guests straining to maintain their small talk, rictus grins, fists tight on wine-glass stems and beads of sweat tricking down their temples as they fight not to look at... the thing... in the corner

so i am a long-time anti-mayo hardliner but i made some at home this weekend to use in deviled eggs for a party and...i liked it, it was good

still v skeptical of industrial mayo

a cheese/mayonnaise faux-pine cone quietly melting on a side table during a festive gathering

slowly spreading like an oil slick across the serving dish, lapping against the carrot slices

its unholy egg/dairy scent hanging spectre-like over the room

the guests straining to maintain their small talk, rictus grins, fists tight on wine-glass stems and beads of sweat tricking down their temples as they fight not to look at... the thing... in the corner

― a very in-your-face, hard-edged machine bottom (bizarro gazzara), Monday, September 19, 2016 12:12 PM (two months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

good post

homemade mayonnaise is good. jarred mayonnaise is gross

"still v skeptical of industrial mayo"

yada, yada Big Mayo.

"a cheese/mayonnaise faux-pine cone quietly melting..."

yada, yada H P Love-Kraft

every time this thread is revived, I scan through it to relive past glories

currently stifling horrified laughter at the recent "butthole salad" addition

shape up cheese for holiday spreading

hey guys look at this

FUCKING LOOK AT IT

http://i1247.photobucket.com/albums/gg622/bizarrogazzara/IMG_3294_zpsrtg3e2yy.jpg

That looks like eh never mind

i'm beginning to suspect hellman's marketing department was infiltrated by deranged pranksters sometime in the 70s and it took a while for anyone to notice

― a very in-your-face, hard-edged machine bottom (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 19 September 2016 16:01 (four months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

me otm tbh

http://www.lonelyplanet.com/news/2017/02/28/mayonnaise-cafe-opening-japan/

yummers

A food truck gave me mayo on my sub today, despite twice asking for no mayo. In frustration, I went to google to search for this thread and found

https://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelysanders/reasons-mayonnaise-is-gross-the-devils-condiment?utm_term=.liz53DVZgj#.xxKXAmgnKR

I think there's a thread somewhere with other instances where buzzfeed has jacked ilx's style, but I can't remember where it was.

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr03/2013/5/10/16/enhanced-buzz-23855-1368216569-3.jpg?downsize=900:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

in retrospect subway's decision to partner with peter north to create a signature sandwich seems... ill-advised

careful buddy, you're close to being a more mainstream RAG

fuck

http://images2.onionstatic.com/onion/5773/8/16x9/565.jpg

http://www.theonion.com/article/hellmanns-introduces-new-meat-bottom-mayo-cups-56396

oh thank god, it's the Onion

keeping that bookmarked in case i every accidentally ingest poison

you mean I can't buy these magical cups? sigh

https://www.foodandwine.com/syndication/mayonnaise-ice-cream-scotland

scotland: always at the cutting edge of innovations in extremely unhealthy food

Whats their obesity rate anyway

every scot is a perfect sphere

Is Scotland also an infinite frictionless plane?

if you drink enough buckfast it can certainly appear that way