EXCELSIOR is the second solo album by British musician LOLZ Coombes.

"you must become no one" is p much what they tell you at acting school.

― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Thursday, June 9, 2016 11:10 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"a man must be unemployed"

― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Thursday, June 9, 2016 11:11 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Hey, if I'd kept up acting I figure is have a 50/50 shot of being in GoTs

(From "Is Donald Trump a Fascist?")

this is how nazi germany sharted

― hunangarage, Wednesday, 15 June 2016 04:21 (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yeah

Kinda inside baseball but:

okay so 4 min into the God of War gameplay demo and why is Kratos leaving his kid defenseless by hanging onto his bow while demon things jump out of the woods at them? also, why aren't the demon things attacking the defenseless kid?

― volumetric god rays (DJP), Tuesday, June 14, 2016 2:53 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

[...]

mash triangle rapidly to momentarily interact with your son without being a shithead about it

― Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Tuesday, June 14, 2016 3:15 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

[...]

"When you pressing x, son?" "I don't know when
But we'll get together then, dad, We're gonna have a quick time event"

― am0n, Tuesday, June 14, 2016 3:33 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

XD

What are the chances of West Ham selling Payet for £50m during the tournament and Bilic finding out live on air?

― Matt DC, Wednesday, June 15, 2016 10:18 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I've had s similar thought but if we're gonna start critiquing each others content well

― The Brexit Club (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, June 15, 2016 10:19 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Xp

― The Brexit Club (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, June 15, 2016 10:19 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Now would be a really good time for that "Hitler eating a watermelon" animated gif.
― Fish is Biodegradable! (That Means It Rots) (kate), Friday, 10 March 2006 13:30 (10 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Friday, 10 March 2006 15:58 (10 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You know, I've seen that thing at least six million times, and it's still funny.
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 10 March 2006 17:44 (10 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"six million" huh
― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 10 March 2006 17:45 (10 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Haha.

hahaha

lol

from the facebook groups thread...

counterpoint: my car battery died, I posted to my neighborhood dads group to see if anyone had jumper cables, and a random dad showed up within minutes.

― socka flocka-jones (man alive), Monday, June 20, 2016 9:03 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

FB DAD: Don't worry about it. No charge.

MAN ALIVE: No charge? Then why did you even come over here?

*FACEBOOK DADS HI-FIVE, ASCEND INTO THE THE HEAVENS.*

― pplains, Monday, June 20, 2016 9:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

love to throw mayonnaise into the garbage and then throw some aoili in afterwards and then stand in the middle of the kitchen screaming LET THEM KILL EACH OTHER

The bald Phil Collins impersonator cash grab (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi) wrote this at 2016-06-21 19:00:51.000

If they have to be explained they aren't funny, but they might be witty.
not sure this is an ironclad dictum, suppose it depends if you can conceive of something that is funny but that man alive doesn't get

― oh, amazonaws (wins), Wednesday, June 22, 2016 1:08 PM (56 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

sex?

― de l'asshole (flopson), Wednesday, June 22, 2016 1:12 PM (52 minutes ago)

Haha. Like it.

idgi

You see it ain't no joke, just a natural fact, all right, all right

Well, I laffed. Out loud, even.

Based on my offspring, who do resemble me, it seems likely that I have had sex at least twice.

Not necessarily.

the old offsprung durch technique

Well I said likely.

Seems an expensive alternative but then idk what yr bedposts are made of

I really don't know why I bother pointing this out, but Jon Snow and Sansa arrived at Winterfell from the Northwest, while Littlefinger's troops arrived from the Southeast, so why would they just happen upon the base camp without knowing there was a battle going on, or why would they not have scouts out, or...

Oh, never mind. D-40, it's okay. You can think it's the most brilliantest written show on tv, you can have that opinion. I will continue to disagree.

― Frederik B, Wednesday, June 22, 2016

How do you figure that their troops attacked from those directions? I think I need to rewatch that scene. I know Jon's troops were coming from the treeline on the north or west but that's about it.

― reggae mike love (polyphonic), Wednesday, June 22, 2016

pretty sure those troops arrived from craft service

― Salsa Golf (Argentinean Ketchup) (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Pretty sure dont excelsior spoilers

aw god dammit I never think anything's funny and then look what happens

Was there spoilers? Im only messing.

Boring

― flappy bird, Thursday, 23 June 2016 03:35 (10 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This perfectly illustrates the problem with overly abbreviated communication. Yes, it may save time and keystrokes to say "Boring", but more accurately, what you meant to say was, "Personally I found this to be boring." This kind of amplification and expansion, while time consuming, also has the effect of removing the idiocy from what you said and replacing it with a measured and true statement of fact.

― a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Thursday, 23 June 2016 03:42 (10 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh

― flappy bird, Thursday, 23 June 2016 06:38 (7 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

interesting.

k

Aimless notm. "Boring" always obviously denotes an opinion.

Aimless was engaging in self-parody.

the important thing is that flappy bird was excelsiored

from the british politics thread, some reassuringly familiar old-skool ILX banter:

i got a letter from the government, the other day, i opened it and read it, it said they were suckers

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 24 June 2016 13:38 (1 hour ago) Permalink

it's always weird when the government sends that letter

― The bald Phil Collins impersonator cash grab (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Friday, 24 June 2016 13:44 (1 hour ago) Permalink

feel like "threats" need to have some kind of hint of substantive planning

― and the Gove maths out Raab (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, July 5, 2016 10:40 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

more of a death aspiration really

― lag∞n, Tuesday, July 5, 2016 11:53 AM (31 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I found the conversation upthread about whether or not GoT is fantasy mostly quite clueless. It is definitely 100% fantasy. It has a somewhat different and rather more interesting approach to character and morality to most of the Tolkien-esque heroic fantasy from which it draws, but that doen't make it not fantasy by any means.

Anyway, killer finale.

― chap, Tuesday, July 5, 2016 4:33 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

different but 100% the same makes sense

― lag∞n, Tuesday, July 5, 2016 9:05 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yes, it actually does. You build a house out of vinyl, it would be different from all other houses, but still 100% a house.

― Frederik B, Tuesday, July 5, 2016 9:11 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

would sound better than other houses

― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Tuesday, July 5, 2016 9:14 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://cache2.asset-cache.net/gc/104386959-neil-young-poses-with-a-1959-lincoln-gettyimages.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=R4V%2FQay2ANwpmCZhkZDSEnFX26bbEzYX071SLyPb9wyKHBDyT13%2Bjz1vF3o2eFYC1lDTb3zaGv8T9R3EMotkwQ%3D%3D

Only if it was heavyweight hot stamped vinyl.

none of u worry abt changing yr posting style itll all be over soon

― lag∞n

what - ilx?

― how's life

for the past few days lag∞n has been predicting the end of the nba, which is like life itself, so that's probably what he meant

― a little too mature to be cute (Aimless)

yes that and also how im gonna systematically kill all posters on this message board

― lag∞n

ok but lets get the oasis poll out of the way first

― O, Barack: flaws (wins)

A+

i imagine the grind of the job, day-in day-out probably gives them a more specific sense of this…. that’s like asking "i wonder to what extent welcome back, mr. kotter conditions high-school teachers to believe that their jobs are far more fun than they are."

― wizzz! (amateurist), Friday, July 8, 2016 9:15 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

(er, typo in name of tV show, but you get the idea)

― wizzz! (amateurist), Friday, July 8, 2016 9:15 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i adore the show welcome back mr kotter i trust youve been well

― lag∞n, Friday, July 8, 2016 9:17 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

1.) taylor writes a song. calvin produces it and rihanna performs it. taylor's contributions are credited under a pseudonym, on her urging. (lyrics and melody and background vocals.) i think she gets royalties for it too.
2,) calvin is asked if he will work with taylor in the future. he says "we never thought about it"even though they secretly collaborated.
3.) taylor is offended by calvin's comments(????)
4.) taylor breaks up with calvin to begin a relationship with tom hiddleston. takes it on a global tour.
5.) calvin is apparently heartbroken. every once in a while he will imply that he is upset with how she is acting in the media but pulls back before saying anything he can't take back. alternates vague criticisms of her recent behavior with praising her to the moon -- classic behavior of heartbroken person who has cognitive dissonance induced by idealizing someone who hurt them.
6.) to throw salt in the wounds, taylors rep tells TMZ she wrote that riri song and wasn't credited. implies calvin took credit when he shouldn't have even though she was the one who wanted to publish under a pseudonym.
7.) calvin tries to "set the record straight" about her pseudonymous contributions. claims that taylor should focus on her own happiness instead of dragging him down, or something. still intersperses this with praising her songwriting.
8.) calvin's friends call him to make sure he is ok. when he doesn't answer his phone they all panic. is discovered late at night crying under a boardwalk. (speculative)
9.) anthropogenic climate change causes a global refugee crisis. world is thrown into disarray.
10.) small, local skirmishes break out everywhere. TIME magazine calls them "the resource wars."
11.) infrastructure breaks down. media goes black. people organize themselves into local tribes; humanity reverts to a pre-modern age.
12.) sun implodes. earth is sucked into a black hole.

― Treeship, Wednesday, July 13, 2016 11:57 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

(speculative)

no newt? looks like I got the copyright on "All Wives Matter" for nothing.

― JoeStork, Thursday, July 14, 2016 12:47 PM (8 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

excellent work treezy

What do you mean by 'cultural victories'? Abortion, mariage, police violence, these are very real problems.

― Frederik B, Friday, 15 July 2016 15:47 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Fuck you

― Treeship, Friday, 15 July 2016 15:49 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Needs more context to make clear that the post he was responding to did not -- at all -- claim those issues were not important, or even that there were any issues more important than them