shit that looks like an onion article but isn't

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (1962 of them)

View Previous Page...

Budweiser Renames Its Beer "America"

― ciderpress, Tuesday, 10 May 2016 16:09 (ten years ago)

"Millions of men every evening stand shoulder-to-shoulder in this great land and piss America..."

― pplains, Tuesday, 10 May 2016 16:15 (ten years ago)

Now when someone offers to get me a beer I can say, "Anything but America."

― we can be heroes just for about 3.6 seconds (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 10 May 2016 19:46 (ten years ago)

― nomar, Tuesday, 10 May 2016 19:48 (ten years ago)

"Step out of the car, I smell America on your breath"

― StanM, Tuesday, 10 May 2016 21:06 (ten years ago)

Every child had a pretty good shot,

To get at least as far as his old man got,

But something happened on the way to that place,

He threw up America all over the place... hey hey hey... uh woe woe

― pplains, Tuesday, 10 May 2016 21:16 (ten years ago)

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/elderly-polish-couple-buy-fabric-tickets-online-and-rave-until-5am-a3249571.html

― StanM, Tuesday, 17 May 2016 19:20 (ten years ago)

Ravers: the man stole a dance with clubber Abbie Leek (Abbie Leek)

abbie leek is at the club and in his arms

― ulysses, Wednesday, 18 May 2016 14:04 (ten years ago)

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/may/18/google-patents-sticky-layer-self-driving-car-accidents

― I've had Eno, ugh (ledge), Thursday, 19 May 2016 08:11 (ten years ago)

http://sfist.com/2016/05/23/rec_parks_pilot_program_allows_you.php

― Dan I., Tuesday, 24 May 2016 18:01 (ten years ago)

http://host.madison.com/wsj/news/local/crime-and-courts/duck-fat-spill-coated-downtown-sidewalks-madison-fire-says/article_34e045bf-1d2c-5fc9-b3c1-1712aa082a83.html

― sam jax sax jam (Jordan), Tuesday, 24 May 2016 18:29 (ten years ago)

the last sentence in the duck fat link -

"The chef contracted to have the duck fat spill absorbed."

???

― écorché (S-), Friday, 27 May 2016 04:14 (ten years ago)

oops I get it.

― écorché (S-), Friday, 27 May 2016 04:24 (ten years ago)

http://www.nationalreview.com/article/436246/x-men-apocalypse-billboard-villain

― De La Soul is no Major Lazer (ulysses), Tuesday, 7 June 2016 04:47 (ten years ago)

two weeks pass...

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2016/06/24/more-than-30-people-burned-in-motivational-speaker-tony-robbins-hot-coals-walk.html

― dinnerboat, Friday, 24 June 2016 20:21 (nine years ago)

"some people were not concentrating on walking across the coals because they were taking selfies and asking others to take video of them."

― remove butt (abanana), Friday, 24 June 2016 20:40 (nine years ago)

not really an onion article but the timing is...interesting.

front page of yahoo O_O

Lifestyle
Wow, Karma! Pride of Lions Kills 5 Poachers in Sneak Attack

― nomar, Friday, 8 July 2016 19:19 (nine years ago)

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/boris-johnson-minister-theresa-may-cabinet-a7135371.html

"Boris Johnson named Foreign Secretary"

― koogs, Wednesday, 13 July 2016 19:52 (nine years ago)

good to know that being eaten by lions is primarily a "lifestyle" issue.

― the event dynamics of power asynchrony (rushomancy), Wednesday, 13 July 2016 19:54 (nine years ago)

Drunk idiot who scaled airport fence to board planes caught out by receipt for Mr Blobby biscuit

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/drunk-idiot-who-scaled-airport-8415425#DLmJ8SWiuPD25pjv.97

― Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 14 July 2016 14:24 (nine years ago)

No link, but biking past our local NPR station this morning I saw this on their scrolling news marquee: "WISH GRANTED - SIX-YEAR-OLD BOY TO BE GARBAGEMAN FOR A DAY."

― a 47-year-old chainsaw artist from South Carolina (Phil D.), Tuesday, 26 July 2016 14:13 (nine years ago)

6-Year-Old Boy's Wish To Be A 'Garbage Man' Granted

http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/07/27/487604365/6-year-old-boys-wish-to-be-a-garbage-man-granted

― écorché (S-), Friday, 5 August 2016 04:47 (nine years ago)

Hats off to that kid actually, far better than wishing to be a ludicrously wealthy brooding weirdo (ie Batman)

― écorché (S-), Friday, 5 August 2016 04:50 (nine years ago)

good to know that being eaten by lions is primarily a "lifestyle" issue.
― the event dynamics of power asynchrony (rushomancy), Wednesday, July 13, 2016 2:54 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

eating humans is def. a lifestyle choice for lions

― wizzz! (amateurist), Friday, 5 August 2016 05:02 (nine years ago)

two weeks pass...

Accused FSU face eater told cops he wasn't on drugs during arrest

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article96949917.html

― Foster Twelvetrees (Ward Fowler), Sunday, 21 August 2016 13:20 (nine years ago)

Security footage showed Harrouff calmly walking out of the restaurant, clad in a blue polo shirt, white pants and and <sic> a backward Make America Great Again hat

― Dan I., Sunday, 21 August 2016 16:11 (nine years ago)

Deadly bagpipe infection is health warning to all wind musicians

(at least the headline)

― Shinzō Abe as Super Mario (Sanpaku), Tuesday, 23 August 2016 14:25 (nine years ago)

O what a horror it will be to never hear the sound of bagpipes again.

― pplains, Tuesday, 23 August 2016 15:03 (nine years ago)

(^ Sarcasm regretted at 2019 funeral, listening to someone off in the distance playing "Amazing Grace" on the accordion.)

― pplains, Tuesday, 23 August 2016 15:03 (nine years ago)

Archbishop of Canterbury: ‘Pope Francis would beat me in a fight’

“For a lot of reasons, the Pope would (win). He’s got a bigger stick than me. He’s got a bigger hat then me. He’s bigger then me. He’s better than me.”

― corbynite, shite (soref), Saturday, 3 September 2016 01:09 (nine years ago)

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/12/jailed-agadoo-singer-led-a-conga-in-prison/

― Foster Twelvetrees (Ward Fowler), Monday, 12 September 2016 12:20 (nine years ago)

there's no way the reality could live up to that article, but it is nonetheless wonderful

― ogmor, Monday, 12 September 2016 12:23 (nine years ago)

lol, I was actually imagining that happening when I first read about him getting sent down

― calzino, Monday, 12 September 2016 12:34 (nine years ago)

I think my single least favorite kind of facebook comment is "not the onion!"

― the last famous person you were surprised to discover was actually (man alive), Monday, 12 September 2016 15:05 (nine years ago)

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/a1Qd14pXQI4/hqdefault.jpg

― Mordy, Monday, 12 September 2016 16:46 (nine years ago)

Intelligent robot that 'remembers and learns' could be scrapped after escaping a lab for a second time

― gesticulating Pez dispenser (Sanpaku), Sunday, 18 September 2016 18:37 (nine years ago)

Haha wow that video of it creeping away

― Evan, Sunday, 18 September 2016 18:58 (nine years ago)

lol, that popped up in the Harper's Findings and i knew the internet would provide video sooner or later

― thrusted pelvis-first back (ulysses), Sunday, 18 September 2016 21:52 (nine years ago)

Bob Dylan Announces 36-Disc Set of 1966 Live Albums

― dinnerboat, Tuesday, 27 September 2016 14:36 (nine years ago)

two weeks pass...

these guys are just trying to get in this thread now

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/15/us/bottle-flipping-craze-is-fun-for-children-but-torture-for-parents.html

“I’m going to need a bottle of Xanax to deal with the bottle crunching,” said Ms. Tuna, who has five children, four of whom are living at home: three boys, ages 10, 12 and 13, and an 11-year-old daughter. She said they all toss bottles, though the girl less so.

― the notes the loon doesn't play (ulysses), Sunday, 16 October 2016 21:41 (nine years ago)

Ms. Tuna
Ms. Cinnamon

― kinder, Sunday, 16 October 2016 21:48 (nine years ago)

i'm saying tho'!

― the notes the loon doesn't play (ulysses), Monday, 17 October 2016 03:30 (nine years ago)

two weeks pass...

The article itself is more reasonable but the tweet says:

"Why is Hillary Clinton so widely loved?"

https://twitter.com/theatlantic/status/795030892137902081

― dinnerboat, Saturday, 5 November 2016 23:05 (nine years ago)

http://www.celebtricity.com/daycare-busted-running-toddler-fightclub-parents-outraged/

― Mordy, Friday, 18 November 2016 20:01 (nine years ago)