hey gawker dudes. what the fuck is wrong with you?

mostly sad but kinda lol

i love this hed

Matt Hendricks Stops Slapshot With His Dick & Balls

jesus christ this review

http://steamed.kotaku.com/darkest-dungeon-the-kotaku-review-1755308882

i know way too much about this person now

http://steamed.kotaku.com/darkest-dungeon-the-kotaku-review-1755308882

clue in today's nytimes mini crossword

It’s always a nice wink at an unknowing audience when a movie reveals a huge spoiler during the movie itself. It’s harmless fun that most people don’t even catch because they don’t know enough about what’s happening in the movie yet. But on future watches it gives a little extra chuckle layer for people to enjoy.

Aw, come on. Lay off Casey Chan, man.

no, he is the fn worst

wow omg can u believe that foreshadowing is a literary device that exists? totally epic, you won't believe it, watch the most hilariously epic sriracha bacon of all time blow you away

extra chuckle layer

It’s always a nice wink at an unknowing audience when a movie has two characters butting heads at the beginning of the movie, but then by the end they've fallen in love. It’s harmless fun that most people don’t even catch because they don’t know enough about what’s happening in the movie yet. But on future watches it gives a little extra chuckle layer for people to enjoy.

You have him confused with Buzzfeed, Stevie. A really Casey headline would read: Holy Crap Eating Sriracha Bacon is Hilariously Epic.

lol

"when a movie reveals a huge spoiler within the movie itself" is an amazing phrase, it's like a particularly thick child's understanding of narrative

^^^ I keep typing and deleting things because nothing I write can capture the level of bemused wonder that phrase is evoking within me

It's always hilarious to think of think of the years of journalism school and mag/news/web experience and occassional actual reporting that all the gawker staffers have, and then their lunch gets eaten practically every day on their own site by some dude who posts variations of like "this pikachu on espresso foam is amazing"

Films should really come with foreshadow alerts.

TRIGGER WARNING: foreshadowing, dramatic conflict, explosions

Whatever. It's better than Hamilton Nolan.

It's always hilarious to think of think of the years of journalism school and mag/news/web experience and occassional actual reporting that all the gawker staffers have, and then their lunch gets eaten practically every day on their own site by some dude who posts variations of like "this pikachu on espresso foam is amazing"

respect

Like all of HamNo's headlines for the pads two days/ week/ month/ ??? Can pretty much be summarized or oh sorry abstracted as: "We Are The Only Honest Intelligent Humans, And By We I Mean The Author"

Also the Hillary Is A Manipulative Bitch series of stories is almost as entertaining as 500 days of Kristin, but I'm guessing the fan base for the latter is a lot more fun at parties

Would watch 500 Days of J0rdan trying new foods.

you'll get about 10 of them

ha, I don't think I've ever seen you eat.

food is such a bore

What happened in your life that you never had a raisin

If you're eating rotten food. xpost

nonrotten costs too much

sustenance-only is fine with me

http://wiskate.com/old_images/sd_day06_07.jpg

When you would have ants on a log in elementary school would you be like, "Just log, please"

What happened in your life that you never had a raisin

― ♫ as we get older and stop making threads ♫ (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, February 11, 2016 9:56 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark

livin right baby

When you would have ants on a log in elementary school would you be like, "Just log, please"

― ♫ as we get older and stop making threads ♫ (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, February 11, 2016 10:00 AM (25 seconds ago) Bookmark

i ate celery and peanut butter as recently as two days ago

Plain log, I can't even

Is this why you refused to have dinner with me on Saturday, because you were worried a raisin might be there?

raisins are gross tbh

I used to like yogurt raisins in the early '90s.

Raisin Bran?? Raisin bread??

This is the most offensive thing Jordan has written on gawker

the raisin was the worst thing i ate in this series

my raisin experience is similar to Alfred's, too many novelty raisin concoctions in my youth and I can't imagine buying them now

The yogurt coating: Sugar, Partially Hydrogenated Palm Kernel Oil, Nonfat Milk Powder, Yogurt Powder, Whey, Titanium Dioxide, Soy Lecithin, Vanilla, Confectioners Glaze, Corn Syrup, Dextrin, and Maltodextrin

i ate a trail mix of raisins and nuts for lunch for most of 2015 AMA

ok i saw the story, what the hell kind of life have you led J0rdan

wait many smoothies have banana in them, had you not eaten a banana or _any_ banana product

i had the same question, only about Runts (tm)

(i realize there is no actual food in runts, but i just mean the flavor)

it's hard to avoid banana, my friend who is allergic ends up vomiting with extreme force every couple years after a banana sneaks in

is this part of pareene's cool political content masterplan?

He has his raisins

loool

what happens to viral content deferred / does it dry up / like a video on a gawker subsite

I poured myself a bowl of cereal, adding banana slices on top. Not so bad.

how is this a real human being? someone detonate a car bomb in 'flatiron'

― J0rdan S., Wednesday, May 12, 2010 9:47 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

this is so mind-blowing to me