The official thread for Lord Of The Rings - The Return Of The King [LOTR ROTK TROTK ROK] (NOW CONTAINS SPOILERS)

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M. Night would be great, he would destroy the franchise perfectly.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:54 (nineteen years ago)

pedro almodovar

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:54 (nineteen years ago)

They're gonna hire Brett Ratner, you watch.

― J (Jay), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:54 (nineteen years ago)

MIDDLE EARTH IS ACTUALLY MODERN DAY NEW ZEALAND

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:55 (nineteen years ago)

Secret twist ending: the Shire is set in MODERN TIMES!

XPOST DAMMIT

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:55 (nineteen years ago)

BILBO WAS SAURON ALL ALONG!

xpost re Shyamalan

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:55 (nineteen years ago)

i was going to suggest bryan singer, but then i remembered 'superman returns' was the worst movie of the year.

― gear (gear), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:56 (nineteen years ago)

They should do a sixties style Casino Royale move and have M. Night, Singer and Ratner all codirect.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:57 (nineteen years ago)

Woody Allen as all the dwarves.

Harvey Fierstein as the voice of Smaug.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:57 (nineteen years ago)

If Jackson doesn't helm it, will Sir Ians McKellen and Holm want to be involved though? Can't see it being anything more than a laughing stock if they're not.

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:58 (nineteen years ago)

Ah, they couldn't cast Holm anyway, he's too old for the part. They'll just cast whatshisname who's Harry Potter's friend or someone equally obvious.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 00:59 (nineteen years ago)

Pete Doherty!

― Beth S. (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:00 (nineteen years ago)

Isn't Bilbo supposed to look the same at the beginning of LOTR as he does at the end of The Hobbit due to The Ring's anti-ageing effects, though?

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:01 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, and I doubt Serkis would gollum up for anyone but Jackson, too.

So obviously Ahmed Best would have to take over.

― It's the lazy and immoral way to become super hip. (Austin, Still), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:02 (nineteen years ago)

Pete Doherty!

Only if he does the theme song.

Joe: there's a hypergeeky answer to that even I'm not going to get into, for once.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:03 (nineteen years ago)

no tell us

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:06 (nineteen years ago)

You are a sick man.

In one of the DVD commentaries for Fellowship for that scene where Bilbo first finds the ring, it is explained that Ian Holm was wearing something which literally was pulling his skin smooth so he could seem younger in the context of the storyline.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:08 (nineteen years ago)

I've only watched a bit of the actor's commentary from one of em, Two Towers I think, and Merry and Pippin were swearing like troopers, unbeeped! I guess the censors don't bother to check commentaries.

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:16 (nineteen years ago)

x-post
Oh for a sec I thought there was some geeky reason BILBO (the character) wouldn't look the same that I missed in the books.

SHYAMALAN:"Stop complaining Ian, you only have to wear this 16 hours a day."[throws money at Ian Holm]

Problem solved.

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:18 (nineteen years ago)

Did anyone buy the latest DVDs that have both the extended and theatrical versions together? How are those? I think might want them since I only own the theatrical Fellowship.

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:21 (nineteen years ago)

x-post -- An ineluctable logic.

I got those new money-soaking editions through a couple of Amazon deals so I only had to pay 6 bucks for each, and basically just for the behind the scenes documentary stuff, which is pretty cool (if you're me). Haven't actually seen the movie disc on each.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:22 (nineteen years ago)

I guess the censors don't bother to check commentaries.

dvd's expressly disclaim that the bonus material is unrated

― cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 01:55 (nineteen years ago)

They better get Rankin-Bass to do it again!

― Abbott (Abbott), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 03:12 (nineteen years ago)

Like check out Gollum, he's fucking awesome lizard cape man!

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/7e/Gollum3.jpg

I had a dream once that Peter Gabriel's RAEL character looked like this Gollum, so I can't hear "Carpet Crawlers" w/out seeing this hissing cavedweller.

― Abbott (Abbott), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 03:20 (nineteen years ago)

i hope they leave the hobbit alone

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:55 (nineteen years ago)

Hey! You! New Line! Leave that Hobbit alone!

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 13:00 (nineteen years ago)

roffle

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 13:31 (nineteen years ago)

I had a dream once that Peter Gabriel's RAEL character looked like this Gollum, so I can't hear "Carpet Crawlers" w/out seeing this hissing cavedweller.

AND THE RIIIIIIIIING GOES DOOOOOOWWWWWWN TO MOR-OR-ORDOR

― stoked for the madness (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

haha

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

Never mind a prequel, when are they gonna do a sequel? I mean, Meltron, or whatever the dude's name is who's Sauron's master, isn't officially dead, is he? Just trapped somewhere. They could have Frodos's and Aragorn's sons confront him, or something like that.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:41 (nineteen years ago)

Meltron? You're making this up aren't you, sounds like a transformer.

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:45 (nineteen years ago)

Also, since they aren't bound by Tolkien, they could include black and female characters too, so they can dodge the issues concerning race and gender in the original trilogy.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:46 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, sorry I was thinking of Megatron. I checked it in Wikipedia, it's Melkor aka Morgoth.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:47 (nineteen years ago)

Also: hot elfin sex scenes! Man, fuck them purists, we want a sequel!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

Meltron is the reanimated cyborgified corpse of Mel Blanc, like Robocop, only with cartoon voices.

― stoked for the madness (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:49 (nineteen years ago)

"PUT YOUR WEAPON DOWN"
"Hey, fuck you, buddy!"
RATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATAT blaBLAOW
"th-th-th-th-th-that's all folks!"

― stoked for the madness (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:50 (nineteen years ago)

I wonder at what stage Peter Jackson thought his contract might not be renewed by the people he was having prosecuted for fraud?

― === temporary username === (Mark C), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 14:57 (nineteen years ago)

there is that

― Euai Kapaui (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:10 (nineteen years ago)

One of those minor points. (And let's face it, it's not like he needs the contract renewed to put bread on the table now.)

AND THE RIIIIIIIIING GOES DOOOOOOWWWWWWN TO MOR-OR-ORDOR

Nickalicious I love you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:41 (nineteen years ago)

He's doing another epic fantasy trilogy now:
http://film.guardian.co.uk/news/story/0,,1870555,00.html

I'd never heard of it before this story came up, anyone read it?

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:46 (nineteen years ago)

Hadn't heard of it either. My guess he started looking into that first when it looked like The Hobbit was doing to be (at least) massively delayed -- because The Hobbit would have given him the chance to do a really fantastic dragon. So might as well sidestep, seeing as Eragon's already been claimed.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:50 (nineteen years ago)

Is Meet the Feebles the only PJ film that isn't an adaptation?

― stoked for the madness (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:50 (nineteen years ago)

Oh wait, just remembered Dead Alive and The Frighteners.

― stoked for the madness (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:52 (nineteen years ago)

Badtaste and Braindead!

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:52 (nineteen years ago)

I was about to say, he's done a slew of 'em. Hasn't for a while, though, and I am disappointed by that.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 15:53 (nineteen years ago)

seventeen years pass...

20 years!

We had thoughts on the podcast!

https://www.megaphonic.fm/bythebywater/57

(Settle it, it's about two hours long...)

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 4 December 2023 16:38 (two years ago)

Settle in rather, but you could settle it too.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 4 December 2023 16:38 (two years ago)

im watching them again- some extended for the first time- an hour a week with neighbours

surprisingly they are now separate enough in my mind again from the books that the sharpness of my irritation with some of the decisions has eased-

― close encounters of the third knid (darraghmac), Monday, 4 December 2023 23:50 (two years ago)

Healthy approach, that.

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 5 December 2023 02:07 (two years ago)

my amazing idea: a sequel series featuring hobbits trying to escape from revived sauron's revived nazgul but this time they're after that giant ass key that unlocked mordor.

― omar little, Tuesday, 5 December 2023 02:16 (two years ago)

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