"Alright Victor, you're here today because you slaughtered an entire three generations at a family barbecue by intentionally running them over with your truck. We just wanted you to know you make a mean potato salad, so we'll let bygones."
― Hammer Smashed Bagels, Monday, 26 October 2015 22:05 (ten years ago)
you got 47 hours 59 minutes to go
― kinder, Monday, 26 October 2015 22:49 (ten years ago)
"Which African tribe?"
"Er, you know, *this* one"
― Estonians from the future (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 26 October 2015 23:50 (ten years ago)
africa
― #amazing #babies #touching (harbl), Tuesday, 27 October 2015 00:20 (ten years ago)
the thing i love most about the period guy is he doesn't know any girls at all. like, i don't really need a shower or a massage or junk food? this happens every 4 weeks and i'm still alive?
― #amazing #babies #touching (harbl), Tuesday, 27 October 2015 00:21 (ten years ago)
I have this creepy image of a dude jamming Snickers into his g/fs mouth
― Hammer Smashed Bagels, Tuesday, 27 October 2015 01:53 (ten years ago)
LOL yes
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 27 October 2015 11:48 (ten years ago)
it feels very much like a transposition of "mom gets pampered on mother's day!" logic onto every other aspect of life. DONT WORRY HONEY IM TAKING CARE OF BREAKFAST TODAY YOU SIT RIGHT BACK I'VveE REAd aBOUt This on the INternet....
― Gorefest Frump (Doctor Casino), Tuesday, 27 October 2015 12:22 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-vie1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/11216832_985566591466789_7877669835837683643_n.jpg?oh=b343d890b81f3805a19f87bb6360b4df&oe=56BB1A43
― schlep and back trio (anagram), Friday, 30 October 2015 08:36 (ten years ago)
"it's just that we're too tired to care about the scorpion we're about to tread on"
― schlep and back trio (anagram), Friday, 30 October 2015 08:37 (ten years ago)
Yes, because the elderly are known for being endlessly patient and not at all impatient, cranky and irritable
― as verbose and purple as a Peter Ustinov made of plums (James Morrison), Friday, 30 October 2015 09:18 (ten years ago)
and that they don't spend lots of time watching pointless dramas.
― Mark G, Friday, 30 October 2015 13:22 (ten years ago)
lol
― Tell The BTLs to Fuck Off (wins), Friday, 30 October 2015 13:31 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfa1/v/t1.0-9/11229685_1195113117172873_3755960818671681056_n.jpg?oh=21ccd22a63507f49b79259abf5712001&oe=56C91CF8
― cardamon, Friday, 30 October 2015 15:36 (ten years ago)
why is this bullshit showing up on my timeline?https://scontent-dfw1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xap1/v/t1.0-9/1422634_913429258726951_7473675208681045848_n.jpg?oh=ad140aeba8c3be014a9794f9936e8d91&oe=56C0263C
― too young for seapunk (Moodles), Friday, 30 October 2015 15:42 (ten years ago)
my advice is to unfriend whoever posted that and anybody you know who clicked like and never speak to them again
― Frump 'n' Dump (Doctor Casino), Friday, 30 October 2015 15:43 (ten years ago)
the page that was from seems to specialize in smug white cartoon characters spouting gross "truisms"https://scontent-dfw1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpt1/v/t1.0-9/12088550_1096874177049124_8585098350225556061_n.jpg?oh=86389057e0416596903f27d5c9b54134&oe=56C3C33F
― too young for seapunk (Moodles), Friday, 30 October 2015 15:43 (ten years ago)
^ the pressing issue of our times
― Aimless, Friday, 30 October 2015 18:39 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xat1/t31.0-8/11894005_10153534046225169_1904520003503051057_o.jpg
― #amazing #babies #touching (harbl), Saturday, 31 October 2015 01:06 (ten years ago)
gotta admit, that is some funny sexy stuff
― balls, Saturday, 31 October 2015 05:43 (ten years ago)
isn't dishing out unsolicited and inaccurate parenting advice over Facebook kind of disrespectful?
― systems drinking (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 31 October 2015 10:06 (ten years ago)
it takes a village
― balls, Saturday, 31 October 2015 17:48 (ten years ago)
of millions to hold us back
― Hammer Smashed Bagels, Saturday, 31 October 2015 19:06 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpl1/v/t1.0-9/12108720_1096871347049407_2495803390187407053_n.jpg?oh=c25920abaf23c9a2c6b6b2cf7f62e47d&oe=56B4B3DE
― #amazing #babies #touching (harbl), Sunday, 1 November 2015 16:20 (ten years ago)
There was so much good music in the past that I've never listened to anything new since I was a teen
― too young for seapunk (Moodles), Sunday, 1 November 2015 16:34 (ten years ago)
Lol someone hasn't heard of Gary Lewis
― Hammer Smashed Bagels, Sunday, 1 November 2015 17:44 (ten years ago)
You keep using those words audio technology. I do not think they mean what you think they mean.
― Three Word Username, Sunday, 1 November 2015 18:00 (ten years ago)
What about when the Monkees weren't allowed to play on their own recordings?
― Aimless, Sunday, 1 November 2015 18:09 (ten years ago)
and they were replaced with futuristic music bots, what about that, mister smarty pants macro maker?
The still made Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn & Jones Ltd., which is a great goddamn record!
― too young for seapunk (Moodles), Sunday, 1 November 2015 18:42 (ten years ago)
https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xfa1/t51.2885-15/s320x320/e35/11313605_751757784953285_437745647_n.jpg
literally 75% of all women
― qualx, Monday, 2 November 2015 09:10 (ten years ago)
actually more than 75% as none of the 3 excluded signs are in the summer, when most babies are born
i checked
― qualx, Monday, 2 November 2015 09:12 (ten years ago)
that one is making me ill at ease for some reason
― pizza rolls are a food that exists (silby), Tuesday, 3 November 2015 02:04 (ten years ago)
https://fbcdn-photos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xtp1/v/t1.0-0/s526x395/12109156_196209187384417_4523977787140670629_n.jpg?oh=a5460ca1964e89c3efd7e02e243645a0&oe=56CD8F63&__gda__=1454116340_6d832b3cfb84f3c756ef6d5848ba572a
― schlep and back trio (anagram), Tuesday, 3 November 2015 08:33 (ten years ago)
Amen
― Neil S, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 10:31 (ten years ago)
What do you type if you're dropping Jesus off at his work place of a morning?
― Mark G, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 10:44 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-kul1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/12063561_454693051383822_4153333492902956058_n.jpg?oh=60eaba5ade5b218b88a3322c7e54d20c&oe=56CCD52D
― Roz, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 11:26 (ten years ago)
So get them pictures taken now!
― Mark G, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 11:33 (ten years ago)
Socrates
― Neil S, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 11:46 (ten years ago)
strenght
― schlep and back trio (anagram), Tuesday, 3 November 2015 12:52 (ten years ago)
[woman] [her]
― silverfish, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 14:21 (ten years ago)
jesus carpoolin with a hott chick
― Estonians from the future (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 3 November 2015 14:41 (ten years ago)
You can ride in the high-occupancy lanes if Jesus is yr copilot.
― Hwætever (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 3 November 2015 15:15 (ten years ago)
He never has any smokes.
― nickn, Tuesday, 3 November 2015 18:33 (ten years ago)
you never [her]
― #amazing #babies #touching (harbl), Wednesday, 4 November 2015 01:26 (ten years ago)
can I just
https://scontent-vie1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xlp1/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/10613108_540055999493159_6468511251066981840_n.jpg?oh=0b12f2eb515aecda569a69de9a9a120c&oe=56C7FA1C
― schlep and back trio (anagram), Wednesday, 4 November 2015 14:03 (ten years ago)
She's too young for you, Shaq!
― Three Word Username, Wednesday, 4 November 2015 14:07 (ten years ago)
Nah Blac Chyna's definitely of age
― tsrobodo, Wednesday, 4 November 2015 14:18 (ten years ago)
lol just noticed the dick outline fml
how have i never seen this one before? i kinda love it.
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/b2/a6/11/b2a61184537c2f4615d262bdab0fbfda.jpg
― scott seward, Wednesday, 4 November 2015 16:58 (ten years ago)
https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xaf1/v/t1.0-9/1555409_727072497382909_4715884090354690409_n.jpg?oh=b5c2d0370bcd979005c4c5c451dd24f7&oe=56B898B5
― cardamon, Wednesday, 4 November 2015 18:33 (ten years ago)