a clown car full of millionaires: the 2016 presidential primary thread

wow, the "m"s in that font are really tough on the eyes

but yeah lol at webb tweeting that

What is this?
CAFE is the only place where people read and watch things on the internet. The pieces we’ve created about news & politics have changed the very nature of our existence as a species.

Many Economist subscribers have been forced to read one of our articles at gunpoint and they’ve said things like “Where am I?” and “Why are you doing this to me?”

creeping borowitzism

new site with Matt Binder (and others)

http://www.politico.com/story/2015/05/1-percent-hillary-clinton-polls-2016-118437

Percentage of registered voters who haven't heard of Hillary is more or less 1 percent, and as that's less than half the margin of error in these polls it could be closer to zero. Even among those who haven't yet registered it's probably well within the single digits.

This promises to be lame.

Virtual reality? What is this, 1992? Wait a minute...

tip: avoid people who use "smart money" in lexicon

the return of virtual reality as a thing is kinda mindblowing to me, just a few years ago whenever we went to a bio conference i had a standing offer to anyone else w/ me of ten dollars to anyone that raised their hand during a q&a session and asked 'yes, can you tell me the implications of all this and...virtual reality?'

then again cnn

the continued existence of cnn as a thing is kinda mindblowing to me

ooh Jeb! has a plan to take away people's health insurance! bound to be popular

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/14/us/politics/jeb-bush-offers-health-plan-that-would-undo-affordable-care-act.html?_r=0

i kind of want to assemble all the people who have never heard of hilary clinton (barring the mentally infirm and small children, i guess) and get them together in a big party w/ booze and do some serious interviewing.

seriously what moron is going to be "oh yeah this sounds cool", it's basically a tax increase:

For example, he would limit the amount of tax-free health benefits that employees can receive from employers, capping the value at $12,000 a year for an individual and $30,000 for a family. Under current law, the value of employer-sponsored insurance is not counted as income for employees.

xp

ooh Jeb! has a plan to take away people's health insurance! bound to be popular

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/14/us/politics/jeb-bush-offers-health-plan-that-would-undo-affordable-care-act.html?_r=0

― Οὖτις, Tuesday, October 13, 2015 5:15 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh man, that's precisely the kind of dumb "let's appeal to the base*" move that will sink a general-election candidacy. nice going, jeb.

*base in both senses of the word, obviously.

otoh

“I think we need to do the same thing as we create an aspirational goal to investigate and explore the brain,” Mr. Bush said. “Think of all the challenges that exist in our communities today because we lag behind in understanding how the brain operates.”

*Republicans desperately search for a brain to investigate*

http://www.popoptiq.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/news-and-events__innerspace-632.jpg

think we need to do the same thing as we create an aspirational goal to investigate and explore the brain,” Mr. Bush said

luckily we've got a brain surgeon in the race!

i feel like jeb bush just set the world's comedians up for decades upon decades of jokes

put a brain inside the moon by 2019

thousand brains of light

seriously what moron is going to be "oh yeah this sounds cool",

welcome to usa, you must be new here etc etc

Nugget in a Matt Damon interview:

"I met Ben Carson 22 years ago," he recalls. "He gave the convocation speech for Columbia Med School, where my girlfriend at the time was going, and he gave a beautiful speech about who he was and where he came from. And then, because Carson had done the first successful separation of conjoined twins, when I did the movie Stuck on You, there's a scene where Greg Kinnear and I are separated. Ben Carson plays the surgeon. We shot with him for the entire day. He could not have been lovelier. (But) I can't believe some of the things that he says."

is there any way to watch this debate other than cable (which i don't have) and streaming on CNN's website (which isn't working on any of my browsers)?

Our play by plays.

xpost-

I'm sure Ben Carson is a wonderful human being to any given person's face. He's just like any other hard right nut, tho: no problem pushing legislation and policies that will damage many more people than it will benefit.

As long as he doesn't see them, he has no problem ruining their lives.

http://i.imgur.com/UaO2bck.png

DEMOCRATIC CANDIDATES IN ONE ANOTHER'S FACE FOR THE FIRST TIME
HOW TO WATCH IN VIRTUAL REALITY | HOW ABOUT A NIGHTCAP?

this intro

Already the Beltway class has framed this debate as HRC's chance to hold on to her frontrunner status before it's too late. Too late. In October 2015.

"Nervous for Bernie." - my mom

how long is this one? less than 2 hours, I hope? that 3 hour one was a SLOG

two hours

NATIONAL ANTHEM?!?

IT'S SHERYL CROW TIME!!!111

SHERYL FOR VEEP

is Lee Atwater running Poppy Bush's campaign again?

haha Webb and Bernie don't shake hands

Chaffee can't hide his winces. Debate winner in Soto book.

sheryl crow singing gaffe on "perilous" portends lost election for dems in 2016?!?!?!!11

accidentally clicked away for "and the rockets' red glare," hope there was lots of hooting and stomping

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyCc1DzRAgQ

Wish she'd throw in "I LIKE A GOOD BEER BUZZ EARLY IN THE MORNING"

My mom has on Fox News instead of the debate.

I am in hell.

well, that was weird. i wonder if someone at CNN owed crow a favor

that performance didn't do anyone any favors

this intro
― welltris (crüt)

I know--made me cringe.