mayo: the devil's condiment

it's a bland condiment for people who don't like to eat

This may be an opinion, but it has no evidence to support it. For example, I don't eat mayo more than about once a month, but I certainly do eat it, I enjoy it when I eat it, and I am someone who likes to eat, including spicy foods and sharply flavored foods.

I just stuff my face with chilli toppoed with great wobbly dollops of mayo all day, every day, morning, noon, and night. Chilli mayo dollop breakfast; chilli mayo dollop lunch; chilli mayo dollop dinner; chilli mayo dollop brunch.

Seriously, I find the extreme antipathy towards mayo from Americans quite amusing, and also confusing. Is this one of those occasions when a foodstuff is radically different in the US and the UK?

Hellman's is by far the most prevalent brand, and it's gross and choppy compared to what we eat in the UK. I get through a lot of Waitrose Essential mayo, and even that is miles better than Hellman's (and cheaper).

Damn right on the Waitrose call.

Scik burn

Is this one of those occasions when a foodstuff is radically different in the US and the UK?

you ppl put butter on your sandwiches, you have no room to talk

wtf?!

^^^In sandwich bars, there's usually some fool behind the counter asking if you want 'butter' on your slices (it's always margarine).

sorry sorry, i was wrong to extrapolate it to the whole uk. when i was in england years ago, my grandmother made me a sandwich. i was very confused as to why it was so greasy until i realized it had been spread w/butter. just figured it was a UK thing and not a weird old lady thing. weird old lady things are global.

wait, people are against butter in sandwiches now? how can you enjoy anything?

hoo boy

i should specify that it was NOT a grilled sandwich

they do something called a "butter burger" in wisconsin. no idea.

I've had burgers with butter cooked into them, sure.

I'll spread some butter on a cheese sandwich, but it's usually a sign that I'm depressed.

butter on bread is always going to be good, whether the context is toast, a sandwich, a hamburger, etc.

FFS how else do you anchor bologna on the bread and then use the equal and opposing force of French's mustard on the other slice?

Many of us were not allowed mayo in a packed lunch scenario because of its limited freshness window (or in my case, because it was a fatty thing made with egg yolk that made me want to yak if given it during the Chemo Years).

suzy, I feel like the concept of adhesive features way too strongly in your platonic ideal of a sandwich

FFS how else do you anchor bologna on the bread and then use the equal and opposing force of French's mustard on the other slice?

― voodoo rage (suzy), Thursday, October 8, 2015 8:16 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this.

i've lived in north america most of my life, in an admittedly international family, but we've always done it this way.

also it prevents the bread from drying out so much

xp: like, I am concerned that you are a step away from declaring "what do you mean, you don't put Gorilla Glue on your sandwiches????"

it adheres quite well, lip-smacking good

LOOOOOL Dan, nobody likes to wind up wearing components of the sandwich (or dealing with over-dry bread).

IN OTHER NEWS are we all aware that 'mayo' is what UK teens and young adults of colour call the clueless white ppl of their acquaintance?

oh dear

jambon beurre ftw

wtf do you use butter for?!

If not on bread?!

There are uses for butter beyond "putting it on bread", see for example baking and sauteing.

Butter on bread is obviously a net good but if that's your only use case...

Maria Schneider to thread

pretty sure 2/3 of french cooking is "put wine and butter in a cooking vessel, emulsify a little, add other stuff"

put me in the "I know & understand that some people butter their sandwiches but it has always struck me as weird and unpleasant and please hold the butter on mine" camp

like when you buy a cheese sandwich from the roadside gas station in England and you see they have put butter on it you think 'that'd be cool if I were going to grill this sandwich, but seeing as this is a roadside station, there is no earthly reason for this sandwich to have butter on it'

how else is the cheese going to stick to the bread

There is no butter on service station sandwiches. It is margarine.

It's never really occurred to me to treat a sandwich like a discrete, inviolable unit of food. Sometimes they come apart, and that's okay! Sometimes all the cheese and toppings come off your pizza but it's not like I'm looking for an adhesive sauce to really nail those toppings and cheese to the crust. Sometimes a taco falls apart, I don't need to drown it in sour cream* to make the shell bits stick together. This seems like a minor problem at best in the food spectrum, certainly not one that justifies putting mayo on a burger

* not mayo, you sick bastards

Thread inspired a tomato sandwich for tonight's dinner.

On a literary note, George Orwell in The Road to Wigan Pier speaks of poor families whose diet consists mainly of "bread-and-marg". He was an accurate observer and careful writer, and so didn't call it "bread and butter".

Sometimes a taco falls apart, I don't need to drown it in sour cream* to make the shell bits stick together.

I suspect if we stick around long enough here we will learn some hard hard truths about London tacos

djp otm, especially with regard to this abomination
http://conversation.which.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/mayo-and-chips-zoom.jpg

there are two jars of mayonnaise on the table. just in case

idk if my conception of how to do tacos right necessarily involves the phrase "shell bits" but happy to be schooled by america here

put some mustard on that mayo, and i'm set. so good

xxp

wtf do you use butter for?!

― Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Thursday, October 8, 2015 1:21 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If not on bread?!

― Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Thursday, October 8, 2015 1:21 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

SANDWICH != BREAD

y know this sandwich just isn't creamy or greasy enough

Mayo and ketchup sandwich

mayo + burger + egg thats a dang fine burger

Question for anti-mayo partisans: what do you think "special sauce" is?

Goat semen

what do i think it is?

it sucks too if that's what you're getting at

Man U ain't fit 2 buttchug a big mac

Wait, people put butter in their sandwiches? This thread took a weird turn.

Are we talking like a turkey sandwich with some lettuce and tomato and then a bunch of butter?

Or maybe like tuna salad with pickles and some hard boiled egg and a bunch of butter?

Good lord, what is this world coming to?