Bait My Clickhole

http://www.clickhole.com/article/these-third-graders-letters-their-teacher-about-ho-3042

http://www.clickhole.com/article/11-things-all-women-who-lift-weights-are-sick-hear-3216

"Will you sign a poster for my young feminist son, Charbon?"

The puzzle of this is thought of in basic biology and Egg science, and it’s obvious. The house of the water of an Egg is contained within the shackles of two halves of a stone bone prison in regard to an Egg, and it’s the wet desert inside of it that floods it until it becomes dry or, to put it another way, it makes the Egg happen until we understand why it came from it (them) to do it to us, as an Egg in both ways and one of the famous styles. Thanks for asking!

http://www.clickhole.com/quiz/what-your-knowledge-egg-3213

http://www.clickhole.com/video/thought-provoking-video-shows-what-world-would-be--3246

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CRYQBGXUcAIOfYP.jpg

http://clickotron.com/

All articles on Click-o-Tron are written by a Recurrent Neural Network, a technology from artificial intelligence research that is well suited to generating text. While some stories are clearly nonsense, others may appear to make sense. They probably don't though – no human was involved in writing any of these. Since these stories are dreamed up by a computer algorithm, they are essentially fiction and overlap with reality only incidentally.

incredible

http://www.clickhole.com/clickventure/can-you-keep-conversation-your-dad-3097#8,

oh my godddddddd this is incredible, the matchstick men thread is amazing

― zoso def (m bison), Sunday, September 27, 2015 4:05 PM (2 weeks ago)

i really just want to repost this in case it was missed by anyone. because i can't breathe rn

http://clickotron.com/
― can't stop won't stop chooglin (how's life), Saturday, October 17, 2015 12:24 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Amazing.

http://clickotron.com/images/23382769main.jpg

Whoops, I mean

http://i.imgur.com/P6hzohO.png

To generate clickbait, we’ll train such an RNN on ~2,000,000 headlines, scraped from Buzzfeed, Gawker, Jezebel, Huffington Post and Upworthy.

How realistic can we expect the output of this model to be? Even if it can learn to generate text with correct syntax and grammar, it surely can’t produce headlines that contain any new knowledge of the real world? It can’t do reporting? This may be true, but it’s not clear that clickbait needs to have any relation to the real world in order to be successful. When this work was begun, the top story on BuzzFeed was “50 Disney Channel Original Movies, Ranked By Feminism“. More recently they published “22 Faces Everyone Who Has Pooped Will Immediately Recognized“. It’s not clear that these headlines are much more than a semi-random concatenation of topics their userbase likes, and as seen in the latter case, 100% correct grammar is not a requirement.

i expect that to show up on facebook a fair amount in the near future

I just found out today that the reason Sean Oneal hasn't been writing AVClub Newswire bits for months is b/c he's EiC of StarWipe. His style has transferred over intact.

http://www.starwipe.com/article/charlie-sheen-falsely-accused-building-sex-robot-y-817

http://www.clickhole.com/video/awesome-man-can-list-nearly-every-back-future-movi-3356

and this is really just for the headline, but still great headline

http://www.clickhole.com/article/about-time-woman-will-finally-be-featured-mans-bac-3266

My Grandmother’s Cello Is Also A Guy

http://www.clickhole.com/quiz/how-many-these-hayao-miyazaki-films-have-you-seen-3352

The Mask That Cared For The Elderly

Woof. Looks like you’ve barely ever even seen a single animated epic from the land of the rising sun. You’re missing out on classics like Taki’s Iron Lung and The Frog Auctioneer. Drop by an anime society meeting at your local community college and try this quiz again.

the can you get over your ex thing is not quite as good as having a conversation with your dad one but it's close

i made my gf take that quiz and she got to "Fucked II Death: Revenants Rising" before she realized it was a put on

haha

LOL!

haven't really loved starwipe until this:
http://www.starwipe.com/quiz/how-fucking-annoying-are-you-about-benedict-cumber-1005

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CTD1oHxWwAAeB1z.jpg

Ha, I had no idea Cumberbitches were a thing.

This is pretty good:

http://www.starwipe.com/list/eye-style-scientology-member-who-wants-out-1085

http://www.clickhole.com/article/5-salads-more-calories-big-mac-3357

aaahahaha best clickhole in a while. the graphic for the fruit cup one is aces.

ehh one time was enough for the gimmick of going to McDs, buying a bunch of sandwiches, mashing them up, taking some photos and calling it a day

yeah but this is parodying a different 'type' of article i think

secret menu vs eat this not that

http://www.clickhole.com/clean-eating

^^^^^ this is one of the greatest things they've ever done

not unlike
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWgwJfbeCeU

too dark at the end, but outstanding throughout

http://i.onionstatic.com/clickhole/2220/8/16x9/640.jpg

(that's a 'next week on clickhole' picture)

You try to run from Fenway Park, but it’s no use. Fenway Park uses his magic to turn you into this statue of Ted Williams stealing a little boy’s hat. For the rest of eternity, people come by Fenway Park, point at this statue, and tell their children, “That’s why you always marry Fenway Park.”

hate to say it, but jeb bush hitler baby story kinda trumps the ol' 'hole this week.

my OH, who does not keep up with social media, went to the US this week and sent me a photo of Fox news on the TV displaying the caption 'bush: hell yeah I'd kill baby Hitler' with the message 'i have no idea what is going on'

welcome to our fair country

lol when I moved there first time everything on TV was constant coverage of that balloon boy; tbh I was also 'i have no idea what is going on' then too

to be fair, neither did anyone else

o'er the land of the freeeeeeeee,
no ideeeeeea what's goin' on

http://i.onionstatic.com/clickhole/5609/original/608.jpg

http://i.onionstatic.com/clickhole/5610/original/608.jpg

feel like i mightve posted these before itt but they r so good

do not recall seeing anything completely garbage on here before but this is completely garbage
http://www.clickhole.com/article/8-things-only-computer-programmers-will-understand-3513

http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/my-infant-son-has-43-rotten-tomatoes-does-anyone-k-3497

https://www.facebook.com/clickhole/videos/vb.1439042583002670/1648336595406600/?type=2&theater