a clown car full of millionaires: the 2016 presidential primary thread

http://www.gq.com/story/trump-supporters-gop-campaign-iowa

5 (x squared) - 4x - 5. I can't run for president, so I must decline.

(+4x)

Geez...put me on a Perry/Clemenza mathapalooza ticket.

(if you want to solve for sum zero)

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/post-politics/wp/2015/08/03/scott-walker-just-got-punked-at-a-new-hampshire-pizza-shop/

If Donald Trump has one undeniable virtue as a politician, it’s that he does not try to fake being one of us. He’s not going to the fucking Bowl-o-Rama on a Saturday night in a plaid shirt to prove he’s a man of the people. The whole thrust of The Donald’s campaign is that he is special. He is extraordinary. In Osky, he compared his business acumen to Jack Nicklaus’ golfing ability and Babe Ruth’s hitting ability. (“It’s called talent. Talent.”) He is a WINNER, and he is here to help this nation of sad losers learn how to win again.

this seems otm, at least in explaining his appeal to some people

The salute means he's reporting for doozie.

― Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Tuesday, August 4, 2015 1:42 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I refuse to excelsior this, but I will acknowledge it.

i feel there is something wrong with my life, if i am certain on sight who 90% of those people in the picture are : /

got em all

http://i57.tinypic.com/2z9jk10.png

^^^Desmos the best most

marco doozio

cred to whoever does that group pic as It's a Mad Mad World poster, pref w/ Trump running w/ Spencer Tracy's case full of cash

Ted Dooz, Dooznior.

Quote from Jeb Bush, today: "I’m not sure we need half a billion dollars for women’s health issues."

remember when Chuck Todd tweeted "public hj" and people pretended they didn't know exactly what it meant

Don't know when this dates to, and maybe somebody already posted about it, but I just saw a clip where Perry called Trump's candidacy "a cancer on conservatism"--echoes of John Dean! (Also an easy phrase to remember; it's not like you're going go, "A cancer on...on...I forget.")

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ca3ROzIICB8

lol perry didn't make the cut for the debate, cartoon steam coming out his ears rn

Perry was absolutely gonna be the dooziest of doozies, i demand a recount

so there's a JV debate right before the main event? seems lame

yeah i feel like if they were gonna do this as a cable-network-based anointment project they should just go all the way, like whoever's poll numbers go up the highest after the loser debate will get the coveted 11th slot in the next 'real' debate, or something. really push them to grandstanding stunts and attention-getters. as it is, i feel like that's gonna be such a pointless exercise, everybody there knowing their death certificates have already been signed. i guess there's hope that most of them will figure everybody but them will soon give up and pack it in and they'll be poised to sop up their scattered .5% followings.

seriously though if you can't get one republican in a hundred to consider you their first choice, this probably isn't your time to run for president.

this probably isn't your time to run for president

true, but for some these may also be tryouts for vp pick

The official 'only 10 candidates' debate has an satellite linkup to an 11th podium in the cage, suspended by chains 8 feet over the floor. There are ladders.

― Andrew Farrell, Tuesday, 30 June 2015 16:57 (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

also auditioning to get a tv show on a certain news network xp

https://twitter.com/cushbomb/status/627933101457436672

jeb walking back his women's health comment

lol balls

http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/fbi-looks-into-security-of-clintons-private-e-mail-setup/2015/08/04/2bdd85ec-3aae-11e5-8e98-115a3cf7d7ae_story.html

this does not seem like good news for hillary

The inquiries are bringing to light new information about Clinton’s use of the system and the lengths to which she went to install a private channel of communication outside government control — a setup that has emerged as a major issue in her campaign for the Democratic presidential nomination.

For instance, the server installed in her Chappaqua, N.Y., home as she was preparing to take office as secretary of state was originally used by her first campaign for the presidency, in 2008, according to two people briefed on the setup. A staffer who was on the payroll of her political action committee set it up in her home, replacing a server that Clinton’s husband, former president Bill Clinton, had been using in the house.

The inquiries by the FBI follow concerns from government officials that potentially hundreds of e-mails that passed through Clinton’s private server contained classified or sensitive information. At this point, the probe is preliminary and is focused on ensuring the proper handling of classified material.

I'm not sure what else we've learned other than what we do already: she deleted emails she didn't want the public to see and it's reasonable to suppose that the line between private and government emails blurred.

not likable enough?

http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2015/08/04/hillary-clinton-loses-ground-with-white-women-wsjnbc-poll/

Many Democrats have long hoped that Hillary Clinton might expand Barack Obama‘s electoral coalition by drawing in more white women voters.

A new Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll suggests she may have a tough time pulling it off. Mrs. Clinton is losing ground with white women and many other important slices of the electorate, the poll shows, amid a spate of reports about her email practices, speaking fees and foreign donations to the Clinton Foundation.

i find it kind of hard to believe that those three things are what's causing her numbers to slump

i'm less concerned with the legality than the security tbh! after the OPM hack it's not like the rest of the world doesn't know everything about our government anyway

The inquiries are bringing to light new information about Clinton’s use of the system and the lengths to which she went to install a private channel of communication outside government control

feel like clinton's numbers are going down because she isnt dancing for the media like america wants its candidates to do so theyre bored

Such a classic Cheney picture because the left half of his face (from our perspective) could plausibly be "likable grandpa" and the right half is "I could shoot my lawyer in the FACE and get away with it, motherfuckers!"

True fact: I went to high school with his daughters. Also Strom Thurmond's.

i think mayor jingleberries is right. far from the republican overstuffed goofball show, the dem race is back in normal primary land, where the summer the year before is still doldrums season and nobody is really campaigning super aggressively because there aren't any votes coming up. bernie is doing all he can obviously but it's not like clinton has launched a full-scale media blitz or whatever. frankly, it might make sense for HRC to let some of these dated old scandals burn themselves out so that they feel even less fresh when this race really gets going.

other proof - maureen dowd aggressively trying to push biden into the race so he can dance for all of us

True fact: I went to high school with his daughters. Also Strom Thurmond's.

My wife used to work with one of Strom's daughters at the Red Cross. Nicest person you'll ever meet.

i believe hrc has some tv ads debuting this week?

I have nothing mean to say about Nancy Thurmond, who was in my AP government class; she died tragically young. I confess I don't have a strong recollection of either Mary or Liz Cheney, who were more contemporary with my older sisters than with me.

just tivo'd the doozyfest
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBaYVo89mmY

Man, thank Frank Lutz focus group clip making the rounds, where all he had to do was mention Trump and the group of Republicans on the bleachers started arguing for 8 minutes ...

rommel you magnificent bastard - http://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/bill-clinton-called-donald-trump-ahead-of-republicans-2016-launch/2015/08/05/e2b30bb8-3ae3-11e5-b3ac-8a79bc44e5e2_story.html

Didn't get the reference (I figured it was from Patton, which I've mostly forgotten--what I mean is, I didn't get the context), so I looked it up. Yes, dead on.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MagnificentBastard

Clinton sounded curious about Trump’s moves toward a presidential bid and told Trump that he was striking a chord with frustrated conservatives and was a rising force on the right.

"I mean, Don, you shoot that shit straight with 'em, and who knows how far it go."

Not that this required Clinton be all that devious and utterly brilliant--a few seconds of something resembling flattery (see above) would have been enough.

Seeds that fall on fertile ground will often sprout and grow.

that ground's fertilized all right.