what to do when your roommate doesn't realize you're home and thusly is having loud sex in the living room

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Or is it Dragass?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:45 (twenty-two years ago)

The Roommate has taken to spending nights elsewhere, either with her friend T**** in Venice, or Tr*cker H*t in Silverlake. She did come bursting into my room several nights ago to whine about her drain being clogged, to which I replied "with what? anonymous semen?" haha, not really.

we've spoken perhaps four sentences since last week! Tr*cker H*t returned for his CDs shortly after the incident in question. We've never gotten along better!

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 23:18 (twenty-two years ago)

A fragile but happy peace.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 23:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Once again proving that there's no problem that can't be solved with anal sex.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

"I wish I could get this door to stop sticking..."

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 01:20 (twenty-two years ago)

My housemate knows I'm home and does it anyway. I mean, that's not on, surely? I have a good mind to just march in and watch telly. Even if there's nothing good on. Humph.

― Will McKenzie, Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

so, this is where you all are

― gareth (gareth), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:31 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Tonight my roommate stumbled into the apartment drunk with a drunk friend of hers, pointed to me, laughed, and said "this is the one I was telling you about who caught me having sex on this couch, HAR HAR HAR!" Her friend giggled and asked me if I "took a peek", which made ME laugh because of the circumstances which were probably not accurately explained to this girl. ho ho ho, we ALL laughed, it was funny.

they then disappeared into her room for lots of drunken gossiping, giggling, and way too loud Death Cab for Cutie/Postal Service. I'm getting out of here right now to go to a bar.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:31 (twenty-two years ago)

So Indie Trucker Hat is out of the picture?

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh my.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Gear! lives in The O.C.

― amateur!st (amateurist), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"they then disappeared into her room for lots of drunken gossiping, giggling, and way too loud Death Cab for Cutie/Postal Service. I'm getting out of here right now to go to a bar. "

the only sane choice.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:00 (twenty-two years ago)

What, you didnt reply with the obvious "oh so you DONT know about the ass-reaming I saw that forever blinded me and left an unholy smell, then!?" at her. And then gone to the bar.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I've returned from the bar, which was ironically enough filled with trucker-hatted hipster fux. I requested that the DJ play some Judas Priest, she complied. I had two beers, and my apartment is now empty. Success!!!

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:57 (twenty-two years ago)

This whole story is incredibly awesome.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:20 (twenty-two years ago)

It is the pinnacle of ILX, indeed.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Gear, you missed an opportunity there. Skidmarks ought to have been mentioned for the benefit of roommate's friend.

― suzy (suzy), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:27 (twenty-two years ago)

It's been some time since "uncontrollable laughter" and "4 am" have gone together so perfectly. There must be a spot somewhere on Olympus for Gear!

My only question: why didn't "french dip au jus" get more attention?

― Evanston Wade (EWW), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:47 (twenty-two years ago)

sigh, the things you miss when you go away for a few months. this is a fantastic thread, but hmm...isn't a large part of the enjoyment it engendered predicated on the fallacy that anal sex automatcally = copious amounts of unsanitary santorum ?

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:14 (twenty-two years ago)

No, I think the image of the guy naked except for a trucker hat is the key image here. Also the smell/cleanup indicates that the couch was befouled in some way, even if only a moral one, in the view of the three participants, which is what's important.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay.

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I think I was trucker hat dude.

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is beautiful. Absolutely perfect in every way.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Monday, 24 May 2004 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

I call this photo:

LIFE IN GEAR'S APARTMENT
http://photos.friendster.com/photos/90/38/6718309/4889806429138l.jpg

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

is the heavenly host preparing to descend through your living room window?

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

What a choice thread.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 16 July 2004 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

you have an unusually spartan living room, gear.

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

That's a great angle for that photo. I'm with her.

― dean? (deangulberry), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that the same couch? I thought it was grey for some reason.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I believe the color of the couch around the time this thread was started could be described as "ashen"

My current living room is pretty bad for interior design, admittedly...

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)

But highly functional. Even for some rather unorthodox pastimes.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

didja hafta shampoo the couch to get the aroma of santorum out of it?

― Kingfish von Bandersnatch (Kingfish), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

they was heavy scrubbing and washing followed by a complete turnover of the cushions

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

a complete turnover of the cushions

the key part, of course. as long as the cushions are upside-down, all is right.

― Kingfish von Bandersnatch (Kingfish), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that your roommate? she looks so... little. actually she looks cute all curled up like that.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:37 (twenty-one years ago)

ilxors on perving on scarcely-visible girl in blurry photo nonshocker

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:43 (twenty-one years ago)

...and that's just the girls!

― The Dreaded Rear Admiral (Leee), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought it was a skinny little dude, and I figured said skinny little dude was Gear. My monitor sucks.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:49 (twenty-one years ago)

You don't see me snuggling up quite so comfortably with that couch these days.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Fair point.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear! would never curl up all gay-like like that.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Curled up = easy access?

― The Dreaded Rear Admiral (Leee), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:28 (twenty-one years ago)