Sunday Night Sad

yeah probably easier reading than political sociology of ussr but 200 pages is better than 0 by any measure

heh

Sad tonight cos my favorite radio show is having it's last show ever.

if that is in reference to trís' college radio show then i quite agree

vraiment un jour tríste

No, it's the final show of Jet Lag on WRAS 88.5 FM, but will pour one out for all radio shows ending tonight.

I'm havin the blues tonight tho often that's related to having to go back to work tomorrow (which I don't hate at all, but who wouldn't 'never work' if they could?).

fighting the urge to go out and hang with people versus just chillin' cos I have a whole week ahead of activities ahead

imho Sunday is the best day of the week to lock yourself in your room and do whatever it takes to distract yourself from thoughts of death and dread and personal failure (books/internet/food/sleep/music are all suitable activities) though you might find yourself running out of ideas around dinnertime, and you'll find that you've napped too much during the day to go to bed early in the evening, so you'll end up staying up until 2am and showing up for work half-asleep on Monday morning. that said, it's still one of the better days of the week.

:D

http://i.imgur.com/ObLAOd6.jpg?1

half considered a caracas.jpg thread the other week but the gis was (perhaps unsurprisingly) basic and lacking in poetic renderings of that city

do whatever it takes to distract yourself from thoughts of death and dread and personal failure (books/internet/food/sleep/music are all suitable activities)

resorting to ilx maracas tonight

not sure whether to post on dreaded birthday/ fear of regret/ i’m drunk threads

but it’s sunday night sad so

this whole weekend just brutal. maybe sparked by combo of recent bday (numbed through) & other recent discovery/ realization, anyway consumed with acute [litany of bad feelings]

physically nauseous

don’t want to discuss but maybe writing this down somewhere at least virtually to another will help me to get rid of this god-awful feeling

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-afi1SrxPG4Q/URaVgGmAYzI/AAAAAAAAKI4/dlH5-25fsR4/s1600/MulhollandDriveDiner.png

aw, I hope you'll wake up feeling less awful tomorrow. in my experience the anticipation of a dreaded birthday is much more excruciating than the aftermath, but as I'm not even 30 yet, my reference points are necessarily limited. as for your other irl problems, idk. glutting oneself on bread and circuses (and ilx) probably isn't the most effective remedy in the long run, but I'll let you know if I ever come up with something better.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmBOHEDr9w8

A good tip is to GET CREATIVE. Draw or record music or write. I've been listening to my favorite T. Rex LP and making art and it has been great. I am so in the zone my mind doesn't begin to drift towards melancholy.

glutting oneself on bread and circuses (and ilx) probably isn't the most effective remedy in the long run

all too true

but thx for maracas anyway :..)

http://www.grillwilson.com/site/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/GoTime1_0009.gif

It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing.

A good tip is to GET CREATIVE.

absolutely agree, but sometimes suffocating self in the way

do feel less awful now though (ilx maracas, did some photo editing, der blaue engel on tv, & after days angst abates, at least temporarily)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Rfk4Kxk5SA

i had a question about what do you do to use the time satisfyingly rather than sit like a rabbit staring into the headlights of monday morning but i see people have thought about that just the other week

Mubi, YouTube, books, lrb, one's friends' amazing facebook photographs ime

too restless and fidgety to settle down to something i think

Sunday nights seem like Alice Munro nights.
But, they still make me wanna die. I think I'll hang with my mom.

Play agar.io

jesus

https://scontent-fra3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/t31.0-8/10557614_10153321911017671_4101802929211723625_o.jpg

This is the big one but

what a bloody waste of 16 days, eh

spent half of them sick just to spice it up

I realise I should be grateful to have had so many days off but yes, yes I am feeling this very much

I have some work I promised someone "by Christmas" and have spent the past 10 days going "well at least I could try to do it before the first Monday in Jan" and guess what I haven't done too

blah

PS I don't remember what that work was but I probably still haven't done it

The person who had been expecting the work probably hasn't remembered either. I've had that happen a few times - procrastinated on doing something, worried the whole time that the person who requested the work will ask at any minute when it's going to be completed, then completed it in a rush only to find that the other person has completely forgotten about it.

hugs

I need a new strategy for avoiding this.

Just come back from a really nice 4 hour walk, and the dread hits me as soon as I'm back home.

Walks, trips to places, watching TV, playing videogames, eating - all nice distractions but when they're done I go back to feeling the SNS again almost right away.

A week and a bit of this shite to go, and then I'm freeeeeeeeee again. I mean, unemployed again.

― an office job is as secure as a Weetabix padlock (snoball), Sunday, April 27, 2014 12:14 PM (two years ago)

^^^ this temp gig got extended, then eventually made permanent. I was thinking tonight about how many of my colleagues treated me like garbage when it seemed like I wouldn't be there for more than three months, only to two-facedly start acting nice when it became clear that I was going to be around permanently. Three years and I'm done with this place, particularly after this stupid-o Friday just past where the desks got replaced because the managers are trying to fit more people into the office. Got this feeling that they aren't telling us everything and that we're going to get screwed over. Need to get a new job but basically I'd be doing exactly the same thing somewhere else in more or less the same BS conditions.

Actually being unemployed again almost sounds appealing, apart from the lack of money and the increased time spent dealing with my relatives.

half term so no work tomorrow and the difference is palpable, tho i can still feel SNS on the fringes out there. i wish peace and freedom from this shit to all of you suffering - when the revolution comes every night will be Friday night

Going out for Indian food has become a standard prophylactic/treatment for SNS.

I have lost touch with SNS over the last few years, and almost miss it really. I have got some Sunday night anxiety right now though. A 2 month old Google Pixel's screen has already become completely unresponsive, causing much noise and consternation in the house. And then someone got murdered by a 19 yr old kid outside my local boozer on Friday night, an incident that has left me risk assessing whether going out after dark with the young 'un might not be a good idea anymore. But fuck it, you can't think like that. Was just gawping at the eerily quiet crime-scene earlier and thinking about how easy it is to end up out of this game and the hazards of "not taking any shit" off people.

I actually had a pretty good afternoon (brunch and a movie). Then on the bus coming home two guys nearly got into a fight. Then when I got off that bus to change to another bus, one of the guys also got off, and was apologizing to me and everyone else in the vicinity in the way that makes you think "Crazy? Stoned? Some combination?" Then while doing the dishes after dinner, my sink wouldn't drain (running the garbage disposal only kicked more grime into the standing water). I could, and probably ought to tear myself away from the computer and go to bed. But experience suggests that I will only lie there for what feels like hours, brooding on my issues and not going to sleep.

I have too much work to do before vacation.

aaaah

final day of holiday after extended not being in work sad

aaaaaaaghh

I'm

I'm actually looking fwd to work tomorrow

^ fp'd u for that

(mostly cause i'm already doing tomorrows work rn)

xp wha

but congrats?

(sorry Bateau, hope it's going OK)

With a young adult with autism in the house, christmas can present an absolute nightmare and has pretty much delivered this year and some. So I'm saying good riddance holiday season, and ya outdoor LED projectors from ASDA sucked shit! But I've been on the end of that trudging out of the house at 5am into a wall of freezing january rain - I can't go on like this anymore - type desolation enough times to know how much that also sucks as well.

xp it's ok, i've relatively little to complain. trying to somehow squirm out of the capitalist cage is by far my new years resolution though. feels like i have to fight hard for every non-working hour. it's probably mostly down to my own insane feelings of loyalty and responsibility, but it's there's no balance, it's off the scale.

xp but i'm moaning because people like calzino have a whole lot more on their plate, and quite frankly I don't know how you guys do it.

It gets a lot easier after you've lost your fucking mind and had your 3rd nervous breakdown and there isn't much ego or self esteem left to cause any problems at this point. Joking, of course!

it's true that I actually have a pretty cushy job (the main worries are that management will work that out and get rid of me, plus the embarrassment that everyone except mgmt surely already knows I don't do anything useful, but I'm not smart or dedicated enough to seek out actual useful tasks and do them - also it's boring and just being in the office with all the constant noise and politics does my head in, but that's p. much a given of the working universe today, at least for desk job drones like me with no physical strength or people skills), and I'm lucky to have had a good long xmas break at all

but hey

good vibes to calzino + family

Thanks aps, same to you xxx