what to do when your roommate doesn't realize you're home and thusly is having loud sex in the living room

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But honestly, I was just glad I a. wasn't there with them, being on the other side of the tube, and b. knew where not to sit.

― Barima (Barima), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 13:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Was 'In The Air Tonight' playing? Are you a hobo?

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 13:42 (twenty-two years ago)

It was 'In Tne Ass Tonight' and I do resemble a hobo now, what with my thick and luxuriant beard.

The Tube probably makes Gear!'s couch look like a sterilised area - oh wait.

― Barima (Barima), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 13:44 (twenty-two years ago)

It was 'In The Ass Tonight' and I do resemble a hobo now, what with my thick and luxuriant beard.

The Tube probably makes Gear!'s couch look like a sterilised area - oh wait.

― Barima (Barima), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 13:44 (twenty-two years ago)

(Sorry on at least two counts there)

― Barima (Barima), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 13:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Scary thing is I've used the word 'asspunk' before a few times. Not in this context, though.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 14:02 (twenty-two years ago)

TS: "asspunk" vs "assspunk"

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 14:04 (twenty-two years ago)

vs "azzzspunk"

― Kingfish Balzac (Kingfish), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 14:47 (twenty-two years ago)

I would like to tell Kim (xxxpost) that I did what I did for the good of the thread.

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 15:05 (twenty-two years ago)

We spoke earlier and I agreed not to speak of the incident to anyone, whoops.

Well, you haven't techincally spoken about it, just written about it, right?

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 15:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, better to write about it and leave permanent evidence than to speak words that'll just melt in the air.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

My name isn't actually "Gear!" of course

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Is it Geir?

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:02 (twenty-two years ago)

If it was Geir, the trucker-hat guy would have left a copies of Rubber Soul and The Man Who behind instead of Weezer and JEW.

― Doobie Keebler (Charles McCain), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't want to associate Geir with buttsex okay thx bye.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:09 (twenty-two years ago)

ahhhh no no in fact I just bought Black Caesar the other night

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:13 (twenty-two years ago)

And a fine movie it is.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:16 (twenty-two years ago)

The Olde English coincidence, too, huh?

I have the vague, likely-teased-out-more-clearly-with-drunkenness inkling that this whole scenario is a complex, labyrinthinely symbolic love letter from Gear to ILE. Somehow...

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I do love you all excepting that strange photographer fop from San Francisco who threatened us with libel but I didn't even know about the Olde English in-joke, I'm so out of the ILX loop.

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:23 (twenty-two years ago)

donutbitch, what's your beef with beachwood sparks? (i'm not a fan aside from some VERY early stuff and their sade cover)

― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't stand a single note of any of their music. and basically some issue some friends of mine had with them, which I don't want to get into in a public forum. i just wish i could reverse time and have them be Further again... or even Shadowland, for that matter.

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:29 (twenty-two years ago)

gyg, you remember a guy named p*t*r d**t*n who used to work at n* l*f* Records?

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:30 (twenty-two years ago)

mmmhmmm... haha, we can take this to email... hehe.

― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:58 (twenty-two years ago)

who had anal sex in a movie theater.
Was it during Lord of the Rings?

This is where in the thread that I finally guffawed out loud.

donutbitch, what's your beef with beachwood sparks?...I can't stand a single note of any of their music...

Please, folks. This isn't a beachwood sparks thread. It's a thread about ass-fucking. As you can see, uh, oh. Um.

Nevermind. Carry on about beachwood sparks.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Revive!

It's been a week, so what's going on? Has trucker hat claimed his cds? Has Gear! started looking for anew roommate? And what has become of the couch? Inquiring minds want to know!

― Doobie Keebler (Charles McCain), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Hear, hear.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:02 (twenty-two years ago)

that couch must be destroyed.

― bill stevens (bscrubbins), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Trucker hat guy got 2-to-4 for Unusual Sodomy.

Roommate got a years probation and 15,000 dollar fine for Corrupting a Furniture.

The Couch was released into the custody of its rightful guardian after psychiatric evaluation. It does not remember the events of that afternoon.

DUN DUH DUN DUN. DUN DUH DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!!

― Dan I., Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Latest installment of Assnet?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Or is it Dragass?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 22:45 (twenty-two years ago)

The Roommate has taken to spending nights elsewhere, either with her friend T**** in Venice, or Tr*cker H*t in Silverlake. She did come bursting into my room several nights ago to whine about her drain being clogged, to which I replied "with what? anonymous semen?" haha, not really.

we've spoken perhaps four sentences since last week! Tr*cker H*t returned for his CDs shortly after the incident in question. We've never gotten along better!

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 23:18 (twenty-two years ago)

A fragile but happy peace.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 20 April 2004 23:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Once again proving that there's no problem that can't be solved with anal sex.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

"I wish I could get this door to stop sticking..."

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 01:20 (twenty-two years ago)

My housemate knows I'm home and does it anyway. I mean, that's not on, surely? I have a good mind to just march in and watch telly. Even if there's nothing good on. Humph.

― Will McKenzie, Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

so, this is where you all are

― gareth (gareth), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:31 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Tonight my roommate stumbled into the apartment drunk with a drunk friend of hers, pointed to me, laughed, and said "this is the one I was telling you about who caught me having sex on this couch, HAR HAR HAR!" Her friend giggled and asked me if I "took a peek", which made ME laugh because of the circumstances which were probably not accurately explained to this girl. ho ho ho, we ALL laughed, it was funny.

they then disappeared into her room for lots of drunken gossiping, giggling, and way too loud Death Cab for Cutie/Postal Service. I'm getting out of here right now to go to a bar.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:31 (twenty-two years ago)

So Indie Trucker Hat is out of the picture?

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh my.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Gear! lives in The O.C.

― amateur!st (amateurist), Monday, 24 May 2004 04:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"they then disappeared into her room for lots of drunken gossiping, giggling, and way too loud Death Cab for Cutie/Postal Service. I'm getting out of here right now to go to a bar. "

the only sane choice.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:00 (twenty-two years ago)

What, you didnt reply with the obvious "oh so you DONT know about the ass-reaming I saw that forever blinded me and left an unholy smell, then!?" at her. And then gone to the bar.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I've returned from the bar, which was ironically enough filled with trucker-hatted hipster fux. I requested that the DJ play some Judas Priest, she complied. I had two beers, and my apartment is now empty. Success!!!

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 24 May 2004 05:57 (twenty-two years ago)

This whole story is incredibly awesome.

― Andrew (enneff), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:20 (twenty-two years ago)

It is the pinnacle of ILX, indeed.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Gear, you missed an opportunity there. Skidmarks ought to have been mentioned for the benefit of roommate's friend.

― suzy (suzy), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:27 (twenty-two years ago)

It's been some time since "uncontrollable laughter" and "4 am" have gone together so perfectly. There must be a spot somewhere on Olympus for Gear!

My only question: why didn't "french dip au jus" get more attention?

― Evanston Wade (EWW), Monday, 24 May 2004 06:47 (twenty-two years ago)

sigh, the things you miss when you go away for a few months. this is a fantastic thread, but hmm...isn't a large part of the enjoyment it engendered predicated on the fallacy that anal sex automatcally = copious amounts of unsanitary santorum ?

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:14 (twenty-two years ago)

No, I think the image of the guy naked except for a trucker hat is the key image here. Also the smell/cleanup indicates that the couch was befouled in some way, even if only a moral one, in the view of the three participants, which is what's important.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay.

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 24 May 2004 11:28 (twenty-two years ago)

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