The new Blu e-cig ad with the soul song in it is terrible - Stephen Dorf livin' it up in various C-list ways, the line "TAKE BACK YOUR FREEDOM" apparently designed to appeal to angry white guys - but that song is fucking hilariously bad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFVYMP1skvk
It's apparently by a band called T-Bird and the Breaks, which... yeah. Perfect.
― sink floyd (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Wednesday, 8 October 2014 11:57 (nine years ago) link
Recent terrible songs in commercials:
Some fake Fred Cole sounding guy singing too fast to be deciphered over modern garage pop, required catchy "WHOOO HOOO OOOOH OOOH" chorus inserted as predictably as computer code. Car commercial. Garage-indie-pop bands really need to stop selling songs to commercials.
Think this other one is for a clothing store or something, pseudo-mod-soul vibe with a woman singing what sounds like "You and me we could be BAEH-FOOT-AHN, perception to get AROUND, WHAHH-OHH WHAHH-OHH."
― that's why god destroyed the radio (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 25 July 2015 07:37 (nine years ago) link
I just last night saw a nauseating commercial for an IBS medication with this thing as the mascot:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CSMxKqmUcAAHByg.jpg
And yes, it is indeed an anthropomorphic pile of intestines. At one point, this horrific thing sits down for a meal and tucks its napkin between the ropes of intestine. It was to barf.
― Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:30 (eight years ago) link
Good god.
― si monvmentvm reqvires, pvmpkin spice (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:49 (eight years ago) link
I think I contracted IBS from that commercial.
― Trimming The Hegyes: The Life & Times Of A Sweathog's Barber (Old Lunch), Thursday, 29 October 2015 17:49 (eight years ago) link
all of them
― F♯ A♯ (∞), Thursday, 29 October 2015 18:00 (eight years ago) link
"I'm in the Buick.""BUHHHH I DON'T SEE ANY BUICK!!!!!!!!!!"
Essentially they're saying "yeah, our cars are shit but now they don't look like shit. As much."
― we salute you, our half-inflated dark lord (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 19 February 2016 08:36 (eight years ago) link
"You won't believe it's a Skoda"
― bored at work (snoball), Friday, 19 February 2016 08:51 (eight years ago) link
Fuckin Bon Jovi shilling for some cable company.
― Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:04 (eight years ago) link
Those are horrible, but the Chevy focus-group campaign is worse. Almost revived this thread to gripe about those.
― pleas to Nietzsche (WilliamC), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:06 (eight years ago) link
3) Two dudes playing piano with their cocks (Aus erectile dysfunction ad [fucking horrendous])
ILX posts that haunt you.
― a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Monday, 11 July 2016 20:07 (eight years ago) link
yeah definitely. wish I could explain why they piss me off so much, guess it's just the toxic smugness of bearded guy + the incredible stupidity of the totally-not-fake focus group..."IS THIS A LEXUS!? DOES IT COST FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS!??"
― frogbs, Monday, 11 July 2016 21:28 (eight years ago) link
"...and I want you to reply IN EMOTICONS!!!"
― Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 22:36 (eight years ago) link
"If I throw eggs at you, will you be more likely or less likely to buy a Chevy?"
― pleas to Nietzsche (WilliamC), Monday, 11 July 2016 23:14 (eight years ago) link
"How many fingers would you be willing to chop off to drive this pickup?" *places meat cleaver on butcher block*
― Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 11 July 2016 23:21 (eight years ago) link
The apple ad with this shite, maudlin British hip-hop track about a guy who, sigh, just wishes he had a little sister
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HiB-hNt_mw
― Have you hugged your timeghoul today? (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Tuesday, 12 July 2016 09:10 (eight years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8UV7SAhvG4
― Iago Galdston, Tuesday, 12 July 2016 14:20 (eight years ago) link
Marco! Polo!Marco! Polo!Marco! Polo!
― Hamilton, Joe Frank & Two-Thirds of Asphyx (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 27 August 2016 06:51 (eight years ago) link
I just found out the bearded actor in the Chevy ads is named Potsch Boyd. And now I'm ready for the earth to die in nuclear fire.
― rudy githyanki (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 8 December 2016 21:41 (seven years ago) link
Afoot and light-hearted I take to the roadHealthy, free, the world before me
OKAY I GET IT, FUUUUUUUCK OFF WITH YOUR WALT WHITMAN
― Anthology of Literature's Finest Penis Descriptions (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 11 February 2017 11:57 (seven years ago) link
THE SEVERED HEADS OF CHILDREN SING TO YOU OF THE FUTURE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1b-Zt2IJl8
― I cut this hair, I wash this hair, I mess this hair up (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 27 February 2017 20:09 (seven years ago) link
"in 200 feet, stop for what most people consider "authentic" Cajun food"
when our phone ais become insufferable hipsters
― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 16 June 2017 22:21 (seven years ago) link
That Dorito's one where they say the chips are like having a baby dragon. WTF
― Unchanging Window (Ross), Thursday, 22 June 2017 06:49 (seven years ago) link
one for the stoners that
― pray for BoJo (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 22 June 2017 08:25 (seven years ago) link
R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!R-O-C-K IN THE U-S-A!
30 seconds later
― Puke and Other Poems (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 29 June 2017 07:10 (seven years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQYkgEJ4_WE
― Anne of the Thousand Gays (Eric H.), Monday, 30 October 2017 15:56 (six years ago) link
So the endless gospel sample in the Chromebook ads says "First you got a light bull due/Then you got a gas bill too" and I at least know that. But I kind of never want to hear that remix ever again ever.
― my dreams in the hell-pits (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 10 February 2018 10:24 (six years ago) link
dilly dilly
― mookieproof, Sunday, 25 March 2018 18:18 (six years ago) link
where did that shit come from, that's not even real, you'd be kicked out of the ren faire for that shit
― my dreams in the hell-pits (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Saturday, 31 March 2018 21:41 (six years ago) link
tbf i'd probably think it was really funny if i were 8yo
― mookieproof, Saturday, 31 March 2018 22:11 (six years ago) link
https://i.stack.imgur.com/ADPFV.png
fuck you
also the real spokesperson's actual name is 'potsch boyd'
― mookieproof, Wednesday, 29 May 2019 02:37 (five years ago) link
this is undoubtedly the worst thing i've ever watched pic.twitter.com/G08EvRQ6du— Florb Netterson (@comicpanopticon) May 28, 2019
― Simon H., Wednesday, 29 May 2019 02:51 (five years ago) link
war criminal slidin into home
nobody's said it for many years now but fuck Wolfmother for that shit-ass T. Rex song about livin' free that's in a commercial every ten seconds.
― blood, loud screaming and nudity (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 05:53 (five years ago) link
fake T. Rex song obv
i fuckin hate potsch boyd
― na (NA), Wednesday, 29 May 2019 21:51 (five years ago) link
That smarmy bearded TD Ameritrade financial advisor who sits back, legs crossed (always in a dark green room) and wheedles his newly affluent marks. Sit up straight, dork! And wear a tie.
― punning display, Thursday, 30 May 2019 13:22 (five years ago) link
any commercial that uses a version of "go your own way"
there are THREE right now. one drug ad, one for a kids movie, one for a pickup truck.
― blood, loud screaming and nudity (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 30 May 2019 21:38 (five years ago) link
also hard agree on the Ameritrade guy
yes FUCK THIS GUY
― d'ILM for Murder (Hadrian VIII), Friday, 31 May 2019 14:29 (five years ago) link
that Peloton ad is causing a hell of a shitstorm online
I don't really buy the idea that it's necessarily sexist or problematic but it is deeply weird, it kinda reminds me of the commercials I grew up with in the 90s that had bad actors and told bizarre stories that clearly weren't focus grouped at all
― frogbs, Friday, 6 December 2019 00:01 (four years ago) link
what's up with the walmart ready player one thing?
― wasdnuos (abanana), Saturday, 1 February 2020 08:21 (four years ago) link
i think i figured out the theme: they all have some sort of sci-fi ship. they are trying to make the fact that you have to drive to a walmart cool, when their competitors will just mail the stuff to your door.
― wasdnuos (abanana), Saturday, 1 February 2020 09:42 (four years ago) link
h8 this guy
https://i0.wp.com/bobsullivan.net/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Cap-One.jpg
― mookieproof, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 03:01 (three years ago) link
the allstate moon commercial is close to ruining "crusin" forever for me
― ✖, Wednesday, 3 February 2021 04:31 (three years ago) link
The Jill Scott Nationwide commercial is literally satan
― Marty J. Bilge (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 17 August 2021 23:25 (three years ago) link
i wonder if state farm has to pay like double the going rate to get athletes for its painfully dorky ads
― mookieproof, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 00:02 (three years ago) link
I don't think so.
https://i.imgur.com/QXTC5eD.jpg
― pplains, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 00:24 (three years ago) link
man i hope jill got paid
― think “Gypsy-Pixie” and misspelled. (We are a white family.) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 18 August 2021 02:03 (three years ago) link
My gf is rewatching Fringe on IMDB's streaming thing and they play that Nationwide ad during literally every single commercial break. I never thought I'd have occasion to implore Jill Scott to shut the everloving fuck up for the love of christ but, well, here we are.
― Marty J. Bilge (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 18 August 2021 02:54 (three years ago) link
It's like if the HR manager at your shitty corporate job Tiktok-ed a musical paean to corporate synergy and it went viral.
― Marty J. Bilge (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 18 August 2021 03:04 (three years ago) link