queen elizabeth II

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With a nice senible hat perched on top

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 09:53 (twenty years ago)

Excuse my rudery

but stuff the jubilee!
Princess A to Princess Bea
and all their work for charity
Every royal lion' s head
on every boiled and frying egg
And every sodding polo team
in Hello ! bloody magazine

And if you feel this story lacks
the royal seal on candle wax
Reel to reels of scuzzy facts
of dodgy deal and income tax
String me up from Traitor's Gate
stick my head upon a stake
And if you feel this story sucks
that's probably becauae I made it up
I didn' t really hitch a lift
to Windsor Castle bearing gifts
And I can prove it wasn' t me
I was on a stage in Germany
I'vealways loved the Oueenie Mum
her daughters and her daughter' s sons
From Princess A to Princess Bea
And all the Royal Family

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:40 (twenty years ago)

i've decided that actually i'm not that keen for the queen to die. i couldn't bear the three-week orgy of 'mourning' the nation would be forced to endure, i think she should time it so that when she does die it should coincide with, i dunno, the world cup or something so that it gets overshadowed completely.

― The Lex (The Lex), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:45 (twenty years ago)

Another of the headlines on the papers was about how she definitely would not abdicate, which surprised me because I didn't even know it was being talked about, the last I heard (IE 5 years ago) it was more likely that Chazzer would abdicate in favour of William, tho this was back when the popular view of Camilla was 'horse-faced hag' rather than 'national treasure'.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:48 (twenty years ago)

the whole family shd abdicate in favour of esteban buttez

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:51 (twenty years ago)

The old Queen Mum seemed to keep her marbles about her so there's not much chance for Charlie that his maw will be forced to abdicate on the grounds of doolalliness

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:53 (twenty years ago)

what on earth are you basing yr marbles claim on dada!?

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 10:56 (twenty years ago)

They played the National Anthem after the 8 o'clock pips on the radio this morning as I was driving to work, and I did fleetingly think I should stop the car somewhere so I could stand up.

― C J (C J), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:08 (twenty years ago)

... well you shouldn't really be drink driving you know

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:25 (twenty years ago)

Koogy, the bit by the lawn is squaddies' quarters, so they would bear the brunt of anything untoward. Clever really. The rest of it is fairly impregnable.

What's more, there are loads of CCTV cameras.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:39 (twenty years ago)

i think she should time it so that when she does die it should coincide with, i dunno, the world cup or something so that it gets overshadowed completely.

you evil genius

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:49 (twenty years ago)

Like when Diana got herself offed to take the attention away from Mother Teresa?

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:51 (twenty years ago)

not this world cup though because of wimbledon! nothing can be allowed to interrupt wimbledon.

maybe when i'm on holiday somewhere.

seriously though how awful and never-ending will the media coverage of queendeath be?!

― The Lex (The Lex), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:53 (twenty years ago)

Unless we all die at the same time.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:56 (twenty years ago)

You limeys could take a lesson from the frogs in how to treat your royalty.

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Friday, 21 April 2006 11:59 (twenty years ago)

i think we could take a lesson from the nepalese.

― The Lex (The Lex), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:02 (twenty years ago)

Hey, whatever works for you.

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:05 (twenty years ago)

dood they got that idea from us!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/history/empire/images/synopsis/23.jpg

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:05 (twenty years ago)

cricket, football, tennis, regicide...all these national pastimes we invented are being done so much better by the foreigners now :(

― The Lex (The Lex), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:08 (twenty years ago)

That bloke holding the axe, he might be from my home village. He's certainly go the look.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:12 (twenty years ago)

The old Queen Mum seemed to keep her marbles about her so there's not much chance for Charlie that his maw will be forced to abdicate on the grounds of doolalliness

Since when has being sane been a qualification for kinging an queening?

― Ed (dali), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:15 (twenty years ago)

haha i only just worked out the perspective -- those are floorboards not fencing! floorboards -- i tht charles's hat was in mid air above his bum and everyone wz jumping!

do you think the chop has already happened? the neck seems to be a gap yet his head is not fallen

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:17 (twenty years ago)

I thought the guy on the right was doing a wee bit of magic trickery and making the hat float

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:20 (twenty years ago)

the chop has happened but the shock of killing the monarch has meant that TIME ITSELF has come to a standstill!

i don't know why his hat is all the way down there though, maybe it caught on a gust of wind?

― The Lex (The Lex), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:23 (twenty years ago)

i mourn the decline of music hall

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:24 (twenty years ago)

King: "Where do I put my hat?"
Executioner: "Oh anywhere will do...no need to stand on ceremony here!"

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:26 (twenty years ago)

i think the non-axe fellow is frisbeeing the hat so that it will land on the head when it comes to rest

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:30 (twenty years ago)

At first I thought the spectators were severed heads on spikes on a shelf.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:43 (twenty years ago)

It is decking.

King has just propelled his head off his shoulders by internal combustion to deny chopper his pleasure.

Hovering hat remains a mystery though.

How come everyone else has got choppers? Did they just pick someone out of the crowd?

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:43 (twenty years ago)

Looks like a prime candidate for Viz's Up The Arse Corner.

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:45 (twenty years ago)

http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/images11/Cavalier%20King%20Charles%20SpanielDSC02105.JPG

I want him to be King.

― The Mercury Krueger (Ex Leon), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:48 (twenty years ago)

That bloke holding the axe, he might be from my home village.

I think Richard Brandon was from London but there are some who say it was an Irishman from Galway named Gunning who did it.

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:55 (twenty years ago)

Then there's the two blokes who wrote a book about my village, who say it was someone called George Joyce - "Cornet" George Joyce. I can find no evidence to back up their claims though. Nevertheless, it is a belief I cling to.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 12:58 (twenty years ago)

i think joyce let the troops who arrested charles when the king broke his promise to cromwell (about not kickstarting the civil war)

wasn't he also a leading leveller at the confrontation at putney? if so he wasn't really "in" with the top brass, bein a bit of a rank-and-file radical as regards democracy and stuff

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:05 (twenty years ago)

I don't know :-(

Legend has it he dressed up as a lady when he got home post-restoration to escape the attentions of rampaging royalists, but one of them murdered him anyway, across the fields.

You can see why I'm so keen to believe this. It is proper ITV teatime stuff.

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller 68), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:10 (twenty years ago)

i was v. disappointed by the utter ordinaryness of the queens hat today

― anthony easton (anthony), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:17 (twenty years ago)

Come on, it's FUCHSIA!!! It matches my flat:

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41585000/jpg/_41585100_queen_walkabout300.jpg

― Henrietta Leavitt and the Cepheid Variables (kate), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:20 (twenty years ago)

She should have worn one of these.
http://64.33.95.224/store/media/hats/11200_Bowler_UJ_Cheap.jpg

― Mädchen (Madchen), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:22 (twenty years ago)

You mean it wasn't floating 3 ft above her arse like King Charles I's was?

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:22 (twenty years ago)

i mean is it so wrong to expect something ascot or crowny

― anthony easton (anthony), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:23 (twenty years ago)

it looks about three feet above to me! (unless she keeps her arse in a weird place)

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:24 (twenty years ago)

her brooch is of a giant lizard gobbling a puny human!

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:26 (twenty years ago)

12 ft lizard perchance?

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:29 (twenty years ago)

::avoids pearl necklace gag::

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:29 (twenty years ago)

nobody gave her some weed this time?

― teh_kit has 18 friends (g-kit), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:31 (twenty years ago)

actually it's more of a roc-pterodactyl deal, isn't it?

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:32 (twenty years ago)

eight hats the queen wore, which were better then the fuschia mess:
http://www.fashion-era.com/images/SocialHistory/hatfeather.jpg
http://www.fashion-era.com/images/SocialHistory/queenredcarpetyell.jpg
http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/images/2003/05/23/23_5_2003_12%20MDF52965.jpg
http://www.ndrtv.de/tv/royalty/images/041104_02_queen_steinbrueck.jpg
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/9/9e/Qe2-obe-2004.jpg/180px-Qe2-obe-2004.jpg
http://images.art.com/images/-/Queen-Elizabeth-II--C10288679.jpeg
http://www.pastforward.ca/perspectives/images/Nadonqueenelizabeth.jpg
http://www.celebratecanada.sk.ca/celebrate_canada/poster_challenge/jennifer_queen.jpg

― anthony easton (anthony), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:36 (twenty years ago)

A crown is not a hat.

― Henrietta Leavitt and the Cepheid Variables (kate), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:38 (twenty years ago)

... that's the first thing they teach you in Queen School

― TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (Dada), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:42 (twenty years ago)

why the fuck not

― anthony easton (anthony), Friday, 21 April 2006 13:45 (twenty years ago)

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