http://www.theonion.com/articles/study-finds-humans-only-animals-capable-of-recogni,36444/
― da croupier, Friday, 11 July 2014 21:56 (eleven years ago)
http://o.onionstatic.com/images/26/26592/original/700.jpg?8037
― mattresslessness, Tuesday, 15 July 2014 16:44 (eleven years ago)
*gasp*
― goole, Tuesday, 15 July 2014 16:45 (eleven years ago)
lol @ clarence thomas
― Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 15 July 2014 16:59 (eleven years ago)
genius
― a biscuit/donut hybrid called “bisnuts” (stevie), Tuesday, 15 July 2014 19:13 (eleven years ago)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PwSzuIW_Klc
― °ㅇ๐ْ ° (gr8080), Wednesday, 16 July 2014 17:33 (eleven years ago)
Oh my god, that's great.
― oblique blasphemies (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 17 July 2014 03:20 (eleven years ago)
haha that is great
― balls, Thursday, 17 July 2014 03:31 (eleven years ago)
yeah love that
― gbx, Thursday, 17 July 2014 13:35 (eleven years ago)
Lol'd at Lance Armstrong with the N64, also respect for importing the JDM version of Mario Kart 64 instead of waiting for the American release, cause otherwise they would have had to say 1997 ;)
― 龜, Thursday, 17 July 2014 13:42 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/video/comiccon-exclusive-michael-bay-gives-fans-sneak-pe,36528/
― goole, Thursday, 24 July 2014 17:52 (eleven years ago)
wish their vid player wouldn't crap out on me every time
― linda cardellini (zachlyon), Friday, 25 July 2014 00:38 (eleven years ago)
that's real funny tho
― linda cardellini (zachlyon), Friday, 25 July 2014 00:40 (eleven years ago)
The crawl/ticker on that is pretty funny: "Hollywood community shocked, saddened that Charlie Sheen was found alive in his home."
― Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Friday, 25 July 2014 02:23 (eleven years ago)
That was in one of those not-quite-The-Onions right after Phillip Seymour Hoffman died.
http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2014/02/02/charlie-sheen-found-alive-in-his-new-york-apartment-aged-48/
― pplains, Friday, 25 July 2014 03:00 (eleven years ago)
BuzzFeed Writer Resigns In Disgrace After Plagiarizing ‘10 Llamas Who Wish They Were Models’NEWS • Our Annual Year 2013 • News Media • Internet • News • ISSUE 49•22 • May 29, 2013
BuzzFeed Politics Writer Is Fired Over PlagiarismBy RAVI SOMAIYA JULY 26, 2014
― 龜, Sunday, 27 July 2014 00:33 (eleven years ago)
so... you're saying the *next* TMNT movie will actually have CGI peni?
― poop will eat itself (S-), Tuesday, 5 August 2014 03:40 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-law-requires-welfare-recipients-to-submit-swea,36626/
― Vinnie, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 17:06 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/dates-flaws-coming-at-woman-faster-than-she-can-ra,36629/
― 龜, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:41 (eleven years ago)
last paragraph ftw
― mookieproof, Thursday, 7 August 2014 00:42 (eleven years ago)
so good.
― °ㅇ๐ْ ° (gr8080), Thursday, 7 August 2014 00:47 (eleven years ago)
That Ninja Turtles bit was hilarious.
― schwantz, Thursday, 7 August 2014 19:58 (eleven years ago)
I miss when their videos were of this caliber:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8fnoZXrmdU
― global tetrahedron, Sunday, 10 August 2014 16:08 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/homosexuality-only-thing-parents-can-accept-about,36622/
― Johnny Fever, Sunday, 10 August 2014 16:17 (eleven years ago)
xp I've never been called anything worse than a big black fuck ox.
― Johnny Fever, Sunday, 10 August 2014 16:20 (eleven years ago)
that line kills me every time. i love it when they pull off something genuinely hilarious but couple it with genuine insight and commentary. doesn't always happen, but when they're on, man are they on!
― global tetrahedron, Sunday, 10 August 2014 17:03 (eleven years ago)
I take it this is how the onion announces they're getting into the sponsored content game or has it been going on for a while?
The Onion @TheOnion 11mIf you believed some websites still had the integrity not to shill for sponsors, you’re as dumb as we thought http://onion.com/1uiMUi2 #SPON
― anonanon, Monday, 11 August 2014 16:36 (eleven years ago)
remember: if you're glib and knowing about it, it doesn't count
― go ahead. make vid where u rap about this new TMNT movie. (forksclovetofu), Monday, 11 August 2014 16:37 (eleven years ago)
/trenchant
there's been sponsored crap on the onion dot com for a while, usually like product-integrationy news in brief bits.
― Forks I'd Clove to Fu (silby), Monday, 11 August 2014 17:21 (eleven years ago)
yeah sounds like they started last summer
http://www.cjr.org/behind_the_news/clickhole.php?page=all
I like that clickhole's sponsored content section is called CashHole
― anonanon, Monday, 11 August 2014 17:28 (eleven years ago)
I like how their free article limit blocked the sponsored content for me.
― alanbatman (abanana), Monday, 11 August 2014 19:52 (eleven years ago)
pure silliness, good chaser for today
http://www.theonion.com/articles/busch-gardens-unveils-new-9600milelong-endurance-c,36691/
― heck (silby), Friday, 15 August 2014 05:06 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/video/onion-talks-hypothetically-it-would-be-okay-to-hav,36687/
― ╲╱\/╲/\╱╲╱\/\ (gr8080), Friday, 15 August 2014 14:54 (eleven years ago)
"No matter how deep you go..."
― i was a downy lad, and twee (stevie), Friday, 15 August 2014 15:07 (eleven years ago)
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BvGXN7nIUAA1OJW.jpg
― Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 15 August 2014 18:27 (eleven years ago)
[Not Satire] http://www.fastcodesign.com/3033865/the-look-of-funny-how-the-onions-art-department-work
― sktsh, Friday, 22 August 2014 19:30 (eleven years ago)
http://www.clickhole.com/video/amazing-boy-saw-heaven-during-his-near-death-exper-830
― 'arry Goldman (Hurting 2), Friday, 22 August 2014 19:46 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/were-going-to-enjoy-this-cocainefueled-mason-jar-r,36779/
― ╲╱\/╲/\╱╲╱\/\ (gr8080), Tuesday, 26 August 2014 17:11 (eleven years ago)
Fucking died at 'jar-powered god slaughterers'
― Peeking at Peak Petty (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 26 August 2014 21:00 (eleven years ago)
http://s24.postimg.org/a6fs127vp/gop.png
― linda cardellini (zachlyon), Tuesday, 26 August 2014 21:09 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/unpopular-police-officer-thinking-about-committing,36790/
― LIKE If you are against racism (omar little), Wednesday, 27 August 2014 23:43 (eleven years ago)
✓
― mookieproof, Wednesday, 27 August 2014 23:46 (eleven years ago)
xp I know a young dude like that. He told me a joke about 'his ex wife' when he was 17
― post...aftermath (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 28 August 2014 04:12 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/leaving-dorm-room-door-open-to-play-large-role-in,36774/
― 龜, Sunday, 31 August 2014 17:59 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/chase-executives-fondly-recall-financial-companys,36863/
― everybody loves lana del raymond (s.clover), Tuesday, 9 September 2014 04:08 (eleven years ago)
This headline is cracking me up: http://www.theonion.com/articles/nations-huggers-announce-plans-for-you-to-get-over,36896
― Immediate Follower (NA), Wednesday, 10 September 2014 16:55 (eleven years ago)
yeah that got actual lols from me
― gbx, Wednesday, 10 September 2014 16:59 (eleven years ago)
lol that's great
― goole, Wednesday, 10 September 2014 16:59 (eleven years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/articles/family-unsure-what-to-do-with-dead-hipsters-posses,929/
― the other song about butts in the top 5 (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 11 September 2014 16:30 (eleven years ago)