itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

"he pushes hard for enthusiastic consent"

yeah i'll bet

lol

He basically argues "always make sure to get consent, because women are confused bitch-whores"

these guys' connection with close-up magic is depressing

can you start defining specialist terms, forks? you're dropping like magician jargon and brony jargon all over the place these days

it's this game son i'm caught up all in it

http://www.oddcrunch.com/divorced-man-words/

CAPITAL LETTERS

12) BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY...
To carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13) DON'T BE AN IDIOT...

That little tab icon is just cracking me up

ew

http://www.everyjoe.com/2013/07/23/health/men-should-never-perform-cunnilingus/

*takes notes*

When a man has sex with a woman, his biological material stays within a woman's vagina -- even if a condom is used. While the vagina is self-cleaning, the process to completely cleanse can take months. Do you really want another man's biological material in your mouth? And even if you think you're in a committed relationship, by the time you find out your woman is cheating on you, it'll be too late.

iirc this is why men enjoy their legendary reputation as the reasonable gender

A recent study points to the fact that men feel the need to perform oral sex on a woman in an attempt to keep the woman from straying. And while this strategy may be successful in the short-term, it will ultimately end up being a failure. If a woman falls in love with your tongue, it's only a matter of time before she falls out of love with you. Thus, it's better to find a female who loves you for a sustainable reason -- such as your mind or your penis.

p sure this actual trolling

lol that's amazing.

look for a penis that is also compostable

While the vagina is self-cleaning

Self-clowning vagina

Even if you're a master swordsman, your penis can't compete with your tongue in terms of creating clitoral stimulation. Why? The amount of stimulation cunnilingus provides is unnatural. Think about it: If the clitoris was meant to receive that much direct stimulation, Mother Nature would have placed it within the vaginal walls instead of on the periphery.

Sometimes I want to find ridiculous things ridiculous but I'm just too consumed by hate.

Just say "Women don't deserve pleasure" for all 10 reasons and be done with it.

wondering if any good advice has ever followed the words "think about it"

jesus h

9 Reasons Why N0@h Gull1v3r Will Never Get a Blowjob Again, Ever

IT'S UNNATURAL. WOMEN'S PLEASURE IS UNNATURAL. So if they want it, they're bad women! Not only "bad" in conduct, but literally bad at being womanly. I just

the naturalistic phallocracy

I'm already at hair-trigger stage today from watching Jameis Winston's attorney say "Sexual assault is a vicious crime, but the only thing that's equally vicious is a false allegation" and screaming at my computer.

These guys are confused as hell--so we helped them sort things out.

https://shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/10-things-drive-men-completely-insane-being-married-143700041.html

for posterity, fellas:

1. you'll get cancer
2. you'll get a face-std
3. you'll get a face-yeast-infection and die
4. you are so close to butt, you'll get cholera
5. you'll eat cum. maybe another dude's.
6. she will like it more than dick
7. she will like it more than you in general
8. she will dominate you
9. she will become a lesbian

i think in that order? idk

4. Vaginas are dirty and gross.
5. Semen is gross but women are also gross so it's fine for them to ingest it. Men otoh are too good.
6. Penises are magic lalalalalalalala I can't hear you
8. I'm terrified of women.
9. I'm terrified of women.

7. she will like it more than you in general

lmao

kind of a motivating factor to perform the act imo

to be of use

on this subject, a gay dude (me) wonders: is it normal for straight people to be in a sexual relationship with each other and the guy doesn't go down on the girl? because to my admittedly outsider perspective, that just sounds weird- like I would just assume that eating a woman out was a part of the deal, and that straight guys, as straight guys, would be into eating women out. but apparently it's kind of not always on the menu? how typical is this "no-cunnilingus plz" policy?

a "no-cunnilingus policy" does sound weird to me, too. for either partner to have a "no-oral policy" is kind of fucked up imho

I dated a couple women in college that never let me perform on them, but I think that's a whole different issue.

I mean I guess I shouldn't sound so normative about this, there are gay men who aren't into anal sex and stuff, so by extension maybe there are straight people who aren't into oral. but it just seems like a basic component of sexual fun is missing here. TMI, but the few times I did have sex with women I went down on them and it was fun!

there is no normal

you're right, mileage may vary, I shouldn't hold up some standard as if everyone's sexual experience needs to tick off items A through G from the list or its incomplete

it just seems like there's a lot of stigma and mystification attached to women's orgasms in this culture and so I'd hope that more people would try out more stuff to figure out what they want, and I would hope that people would feel like they could talk about what they want, but that's where gender standards make it maybe harder to do that. but I'm speculating here . . .

based entirely on anecdotal evidence it's my experience that cunnilingus is pretty culturally pervasive in 2014. i'm sure it's not unanimous.

yeah I'd agree w that. same could be said for fellatio too probably.

I had never heard of a no-cunnilingus policy until I saw that ep of the Sopranos where Junior beats up his girlfriend for telling all the mafia wives about it.

There are definitely cultural pockets, often patriarchal, where it has some stigma or association (I remember this article making the rounds a few years back: http://newblackman.blogspot.com/2012/08/lil-wayne-and-new-politics-of.html). Also, women feeling self-conscious about their bodies is very much a thing, at least among some women I've dated or have spoken with about the topic.

There's never been a commercial industry telling men that their genitals are dirty and need to be flushed out or scented or w/e, either.

what I'm saying is, this really is just another aspect of the lysol douche thread

presumably the 21st century equality we will reach here will be axe douche for men

A he-man batch o magazine ads featuring dudes self conscious about the smell o their sacks

http://explosm.net/comics/3167/

http://dontpaniconline.com/magazine/radar/the-sad-world-of-the-dan-bilzerian-fanboy

http://i.imgur.com/gJvsAQ6.jpg

http://wildernesscollective.com/manternship/

The successful applicant will:

-be averse to complaining

-be able to ride an off-road motorcycle very swiftly, two-up*

-know how to backup a 24′ trailer down a steep mountain road

-be an experienced outdoorsman

-exhibit a deep passion for cleaning and organizing camping gear

-be a skilled conversationalist & storyteller

-possess strong mechanical field repair skills

-be a resourceful improvisor

-reside in Los Angeles

-be an overall beast of burden

-not assume internships lead to employment

-be a specialist in GSD

Duration:

-March 1 – June 18

Compensation:

-you will join 3+ official WC trips this spring

-you will get fed on these trips

*NO guarantee you will be riding a motorcycle on ANY of the aforementioned trips

a specialist in German Shepherd Dogs?