"Have you been flying a lot recently?"
― mind totally brown (darraghmac), Monday, 9 December 2013 16:06 (twelve years ago)
"I think you may have a gluten as well as a kryptonite intolerance"
― conrad, Monday, 9 December 2013 16:09 (twelve years ago)
"well everything seems fine, but id like to look more into these lasers shooting out of your eyes clark, thats not normal in a man your age"
― mind totally brown (darraghmac), Monday, 9 December 2013 16:13 (twelve years ago)
"the good news is those adamantium hypodermics arrived so maybe we can finally take a blood sample"
― conrad, Monday, 9 December 2013 16:22 (twelve years ago)
"Your blood pressure is good, it's just not super"
― Strangers look on with a discernible, barely contained ‘wow’. (forksclovetofu), Monday, 9 December 2013 16:37 (twelve years ago)
"let's just skip the prostate check after last time, eh"
― mind totally brown (darraghmac), Monday, 9 December 2013 16:38 (twelve years ago)
"ok 'man of steel' I don't care if the stethoscope's cold I can't hear properly if you don't take the suit off"
― conrad, Monday, 9 December 2013 16:59 (twelve years ago)
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/12/09/g290/131209_contest_g290.jpg
― Mark G, Monday, 16 December 2013 11:28 (twelve years ago)
This is the one to run until 29th Dec..
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/12/23/p465/131223_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Monday, 16 December 2013 11:29 (twelve years ago)
"Well, he did sing like a canary this morning"
― Mark G, Monday, 16 December 2013 11:30 (twelve years ago)
vg
"fourteen arms and the cunt cant swim"
― Bigsam: flotsam and jetsam @ whetsam? (darraghmac), Monday, 16 December 2013 11:39 (twelve years ago)
"The hell with it. No more red bull last requests."
― Bigsam: flotsam and jetsam @ whetsam? (darraghmac), Monday, 16 December 2013 11:42 (twelve years ago)
"tonight, he sleeps with the finches"
― Legitimate space tale (LocalGarda), Monday, 16 December 2013 11:52 (twelve years ago)
"no need to get in a flap"
― conrad, Monday, 16 December 2013 13:50 (twelve years ago)
Did the boss say "he's dead or us" or "he's Daedalus?"
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 16 December 2013 14:42 (twelve years ago)
LG for the win
― wee knights of the round table (Noodle Vague), Monday, 16 December 2013 14:43 (twelve years ago)
Mark and LG nailed.
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 16 December 2013 14:43 (twelve years ago)
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2014/01/20/p465/140120_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Tuesday, 14 January 2014 00:18 (twelve years ago)
"It only hurts when I laugh."
― EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 14 January 2014 00:44 (twelve years ago)
Excellent
― is this semi-amateurism? (darraghmac), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 01:03 (twelve years ago)
"Who are you and what have you done with Hamburglar?"
― UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 12:39 (twelve years ago)
"If you're Mary Palm, where are your five sisters?"
― time is a train that make the future flag post (snoball), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 13:40 (twelve years ago)
"This isn't an island, it's a giant oyster."
― time is a train that make the future flag post (snoball), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 13:41 (twelve years ago)
It's be funnier the other way around: "I only laugh when it hurts."
― Ian from Etobicoke (Phil D.), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 13:41 (twelve years ago)
Clown: "Well I always give my clients a happy finish."
― time is a train that make the future flag post (snoball), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 13:42 (twelve years ago)
"Seriously, take a good look at my face"
― UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 14:26 (twelve years ago)
"Are you Severin?"
― time is a train that make the future flag post (snoball), Tuesday, 14 January 2014 14:34 (twelve years ago)
"Well, there are plenty more fish in the sea, Mildred."
― Grampsy, Tuesday, 14 January 2014 14:43 (twelve years ago)
"Silvio's out. I'm Beppe."
― Øystein, Tuesday, 14 January 2014 17:15 (twelve years ago)
"If only I had enough balloons to make you a heart."
― Øystein, Tuesday, 14 January 2014 17:17 (twelve years ago)
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2014/05/12/p465/140512_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 14:53 (twelve years ago)
"when I asked you to leave the door open for a while I meant the oven door"
― conrad, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 15:06 (twelve years ago)
"The body of Christ, the bread of heaven."
― Diddley Hollyberry (Phil D.), Tuesday, 6 May 2014 15:08 (twelve years ago)
"you knew we were running low on ammo and now you've used up the last of the eggs too"
― conrad, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 15:16 (twelve years ago)
"more flies with honey, dear."
― sitting on a claud all day gotta make your butt numb (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 6 May 2014 15:22 (twelve years ago)
arms in the foreground seem to suggest this is from the zombie's perspective?
― sitting on a claud all day gotta make your butt numb (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 6 May 2014 15:24 (twelve years ago)
"Hon, next Sunday let's just watch Walking Dead by ourselves. This cosplay thing is getting out of hand."
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 6 May 2014 16:37 (twelve years ago)
"Quick, help me ruin their appetite."
― anonanon, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 17:42 (twelve years ago)
Winner.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 20:28 (twelve years ago)
"Psst... the secret ingredient is BRAINS"
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 20:31 (twelve years ago)
movie night of the living dead
― james lipton and his francs (darraghmac), Tuesday, 6 May 2014 20:32 (twelve years ago)
"paleo at 10 o'clock, pair of gluten-frees on your two and three"
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 6 May 2014 22:31 (twelve years ago)
And the completely rub finalists:
"Let's hope for some nut allergies." "But first an amuse-bouche?" "I like that we're not trapped in traditional gender roles."
― Mark G, Tuesday, 20 May 2014 14:36 (twelve years ago)
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2014/05/26/p465/140526_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Tuesday, 20 May 2014 14:37 (twelve years ago)
open door punchline (get it out of the way now)
"Yes, I do have a tiny pianist, why do you ask?"
I asked for a 12 inch *violinist*
― woy wogers (darraghmac), Tuesday, 20 May 2014 14:39 (twelve years ago)
XP obv
― woy wogers (darraghmac), Tuesday, 20 May 2014 14:40 (twelve years ago)
"This is Risque Escort Services? I have a complaint."
― sitting on a claud all day gotta make your butt numb (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 20 May 2014 14:50 (twelve years ago)
"Cancel the hamster; I'll just need the tube, thanks."
― Øystein, Tuesday, 20 May 2014 17:57 (twelve years ago)
"Yes, is this room service?"
― Doritos Loco Parentis (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 20 May 2014 18:10 (twelve years ago)