ok lets all shit our pants to something new: post 2005 horror film thread

Also I guess the monkey was kind of splashy.

here's that other thread

have you seen SNOWTOWN aka the snowtown murders aka the grim indie bleakathon that's so worth it

Why do the Paranormal Activity movies scare me so much??? It's 1 in the afternoon on a beautiful sunny fall day and I'm watching this PA3 while I'm working and I cringe in fear every time that stupid fan camera pans into the empty side of the room and the Bloody Mary scene just about sent me over the edge.

Seriously I think I need to explore this in therapy. Maybe I was haunted by a demon as a child and these movies are bringing up repressed memories.

Ask Scalia.

I curse too much for him to want to talk to me. Thank fucking god.

They scare me too!! Also I have discovered that "male friend" from Lords of Salem is the Geico caveman.

I have lords of Salem and paranormal activity 4 at the house tonight. Just picked lords of Salem, let's see how this goes.

Looks like there's going to be a lot of Sherri moon zombie in this, which is a bad sign because she has never not been terrible ever

sherri boobs zombie

Paranormal Activity 4 is abysmal, and i say this as a fan of the series.

There was a fourth one? Oh, wait, was this the one with the haunted Facebook page or whatever?

There was a fourth and will be a fifth next year, though they keep pushing back the release date (a sure sign of quality).

I'm pretty content with the story arc of the first three and will probably quit while I'm ahead.

I'm a big fan of PA 1-3, but 4 is sadly a big notch downward. Still basically does well what the others do but the "narrative" (as it were) is much weaker. I had kind of hoped that each film would continue being a prequel of the previous, and by now we'd be watching 8mm footage or slide shows of daguerreotypes or something.

In other news, SPLINTER is a decent newish flick. It's basically the monster from THE THING terrorizing a group of people caught inside of a gas station (a la THE MIST). Plus there's running body parts like EVIL DEAD 2. A nice mix.

Yeah, I saw Splinter a few years ago, I want to say. Pretty novel take on the usual trapped in a cabin scenario.

dug splinter. fun, fast paced, definitely worth a watch, if nothing great.

I think the Paranomal Activitys were always on a downward slope but 4 was where it flipped into two-star "man i wish i had the strength not to watch the next one" territory. but the basic BOO format is so durable.

watched the evil dead remake last night. even with all the bad buzz on here, that was pretty disappointing. i wondered how they could make me not like a film where Jane Levy is Ash, and the answer is (SPOILER) "don't make her Ash until the last ten minutes."

could totally imagine the sequel being better though. i mean, they did it the first time.

yeah, was ass movie.

started watching american mary last night, during a power outage. made it about 2/3 of the way through before my laptop conked, but really enjoyed what i saw. fun central character/performance (rowr), good balance of suspense and black humor, offhand amorality, mod fetishists, and a novel point of view. some iffy decisions, but nothing egregious. looking forward to the rest, so thanks for the rec, carl agatha. doesn't remind me strongly of may, but i can see why you'd draw the connection.

on the same tip: excision (i'm repeating myself, i know). don't think it got much support here, but i LOVED that movie. similar enough to may to be accused of ripping it off, but so good i don't care. annalynne mccord is great in it, and the surgical horror angle ties it back in to american mary. more like this, please.

tbf it's been a long time since I've seen May and some of the connection I'm drawing may just be "weird brunette does bad things."

Central character is super pretty, isn't she???? I definitely came away with a crush on Katharine Isabelle.

The real question, though, is what should I watch on Netflix streaming today?

Poultrygeist

Wait. Save that for me.

Any strong recommendations for recent horror movies that aren't heavy on the blood/gore?

The most recent one from me would be "magic magic" but like I said upthread a bit, I imagine it's going to be a bit divisive. Also arguably not horror per se.

Btw dug lords of Salem a lot, weirdo hallucinatory strangeness, minimal scares, whiffs of cremaster style strangeness but filtered through rob zombie bong water junk aesthetic. Def less brutal and more paced than all his other stuff, with way way less schtick. Except for the parts where it is all schtick. Sort of. That will make sense if you see it, honestly.

finished and liked american mary, but it does lose some steam and begin to wander in the second half. business with the club owner seemed underdeveloped, and the conclusion came out of nowhere. still, i liked it a lot better than most horror films i've seen recently (though it's tangential to the genre).

started snowtown murders. style and characters are great, but i'm dreading the drop.

NA, you could do a lot worse than The Lords of Salem -- low blood/gore, pretty strong movie.

We watched COME OUT AND PLAY last night, which is an almost shot-for-shot remake of WHO CAN KILL A CHILD? It was totally solid, though I don't know why you wouldn't just watch WHO CAN KILL A CHILD. By the way, if you like CHILDREN OF THE CORN and haven't seen WHO CAN KILL A CHILD? you're really missing out, it's great, provided you can get past the bizarre concentration camp opening credits.

Sorry for all the capital letters.

Simmer down, buddy.

paranormal activity 4 really wasnt that bad imo, huge drop in quality from 3, but i would rank them pretty much 3>1>4>2

really does seem to be a totally dead end road now tho, theyve exhausted just about all the tricks at this point

three had some good BOOs but the ending ticks me off so much. How could it logically lead to the first movie?

Watched most of Lords of Salem. So far ... it seems sort of like had Rob Zombie made a really good contemporary witch movie, then had it take away from him by a different Rob Zombie who demanded a third Rob Zombie cut some 25 minutes out of it. As much as I appreciate his literal-mindedness as a director, I wish there was more suspense/mystery to it. Bits reminded me (so far) of "The Fog" and, of all things, "Halloween 3."

yeah, it's way more reminiscent of carpenter than his halloween films (i dunno, i only saw the first)

kind of psyched for this escape from tomorrow movie. hadn't heard a thing about it until this morning, but maybe just cuz i haven't been paying attention.

xp Curb your skepticism and SEE THE SECOND!

You mean Zombie's Halloween 2? I want to say I never made it past all the backstory at the beginning.

Some decent convo about Halloween 2 upthread. I'm mixed on it but love that it has its defenders.

yeah one of the more interesting things abt LoS was the way that all the exterior shots are super dread infused, has a very carpentery vibe in those spots in particular

One of the other more interesting things was that it's called Lords of Salem, and I barely recall so much as an establishing shot of Salem, MA.

I didn't get any dread, though, since there is no mystery. When you start your film with writhing, cackling naked witches, it sort of plays your hand a little early.

I liked the main Satanic theme in LoS. I wish there were more to the song!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZKg6NZoVXk&list=RD02zPmyFWDo8so

Zombie's Halloween 2 recommended if you always thought Michael Myers dreamed of the director's wife and ponies

I'm no zombie fan, never really enjoyed one of his films tbh, tho I've got some grudging respect for what he's accomplished (cut to teenage me jamming pre-metal scumrock-era white zombie in '87... successful hollywood director didn't seem like it was in the cards for this guy).

but I realllly liked lords of salem, and would've been nudged into total love if the coda was more satisfying. it reached for some phantasmagorical jodorowsky wtf extended climax, but without a real commitment to per/subversion it devolved into 90s metal music video hijinks. for 3/4 of the runtime I enjoyed the lazy drift of its horror-movie-as-tone-poem style, before it decided to become a nu-metal inland empire. yr moves gotta be real sharp if yer gonna drive off the edge of the page like that, and all the promise of that stately lushness ended up delivering more rick rubin than rubens.

all that neg aside, anybody who gives me a beautifully shot & designed well-acted goth-out with that eerie surreal/quotidian vibe is pushing my buttons bigtime. was pretty impressed w/ ms zombie's perf too. her take on a single middle-aged tatted-up ex-junkie (er, spoiler?) who just really wants to get thru the day and hang with her dog, well, there weren't a lot of false notes there. and, as somebody noted above, refreshing to see that person as a central character. I mean we all know someone kinda like this, right? she nailed it.

I can see some of the carpenter ref's others noted above, but lynch is who I kept thinking of during all the interior creepy apartment / foreboding hallway sequences, also in the charmingly-polite/foulmouth-psycho binaries of the landlady and her coven (shit more spoilers). I guess a bit of polanski apartment trilogy in there too. and I dug the comedy intertitles obv swiped from kubrick - horrific sting cue / jump cut / MONDAY - that shit never gets old.

so, lots to like in there, would recommend.

The Conjuring is worth a watch, good couple of jumps in there, had me kinda creeped out in a few parts. Little bit predictable, but still enjoyable.

Watched REC 3 last night. What a total waste of time! The first two are so good, and this one seems to be heading in a good direction until about ten minutes in when the filmmaker abandons the effective found-footage angle and just goes for a regular movie -- a boring zombie movie, as it turns out, with a (sigh) blood-spattered bride with a (sigh) chainsaw. A day later, I'm still pissed off about it.

Right there with you, that movie made me furious.

I am planning on watching 'You're Next' tonight :D

Rec 3 was silly. One of those situations where the first two movies did everything so right I guess they felt they had to go a totally different direction.

Lords of Salem has stuck with me, despite its shortcomings. I sort of wish, again, that there was more mystery to it, that it would be more like the Salem witch "2001" or something. Though I guess it comes close at times.

You're Next more like bore next :(

I had 0.0 interest in seeing you're next until I found out the lead from upstream color was in it, guess she couldn't save it singlehandedly huh