why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

I could always tell when Mum was working through some shit when I came home from school and all the roses were pruned down to bare stalks

she still needed therapy

Its that thing where something helps one person and they think it will help everyone. "Hey, ur depressed? Just paint! That helped me!!"

I'm thinking of writing down all the little tips people give me to deal with depression; maybe seeing them all written down will make some sense. Maybe even try them all in one day...

1,001 Things To Do Before You Try Therapy

THE TOMATOES DON'T JUST SIT THERE JUDGING ME, THE TOMATOES LOVE ME

BUT TOMATOES DISAGREE WITHME

i had to mow down the tomato plants with the ride on mower, dont u see? they were willfully disobeying my wishes, i just want to be respected in my own home goddammit

http://www.hulu.com/watch/16417

xp

i lolled.

then i cried, then i wept hysterically, then i ran up and down the street naked and screaming.

minor canadian php deity; you owe me beers wooo

― mookieproof, Saturday, August 31, 2013 11:42 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nice, i will gladly pay up

https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/q71/1150328_697046476976605_245106574_n.jpg

I love tortured acronyms as much as the next person but this is too much.

https://sphotos-a-atl.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1157740_538122199577051_472311958_n.jpg

lol, like

except the Chinese flag analogy doesn't really work

Argh, I started trying to fix those acronyms in my head but there were just too many.

I just saw this one on a friend's mom's feed

https://sphotos-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/21410_10151917342442150_1326361362_n.jpg

the wiring looks a little scary in that coffee place. maybe that's why they don't have wi-fi.

i always think its a bad idea in any store to have any kind of negative signage. NO we don't take credit cards. telling people what you don't have and what you don't do is psychologically bad retail strategy. and the sad reason they have to put the sign up is because a hundred people a day ask if they have wi-fi.

Leave your book at the door... we TALK to each other.

I go to coffee shops to do homework or other work. I guess I could just chat with strangers about my quizzes instead.

I just want to take a moment itt to mention how much I hate "Thug Kitchen"

No, we don't have wi-fi... and we blame you for that.

I just want to take a moment itt to mention how much I hate "Thug Kitchen"

― crüt, Monday, September 2, 2013 12:12 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

while i have no doubt it's written by a 30-yo wite girl i kinda can't help liking thug kitchen.

Shopping at Wal Mart on Labor Day
is like flying a Chinese flag... on Labor Day

"Hey, sucks that theres no wi-fi here"
"Yeah. There's a place just down the street that does though."
"Cool, let's go there"

I just want to take a moment itt to mention how much I hate "Thug Kitchen"

― crüt, Monday, September 2, 2013 4:12 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ME TOO. I can't quite articulate why, but I do. I mean, it's judgmental foodie nonsense, but there's something extra there to hate as well.

that walmart thing i posted came from a facebook page called Union Thugs. thugs are in i guess.

"No we don't have common ground...aside from what's in the coffee"

*all the workers die from touching two electrical appliances at the same time*

The Condescension Gif Meme movement is the nadir of the 10s

its a debbie downer world.

enjoying that cup of coffee?

4033838772 trees were killed to make the cup.

doesn't taste so good anymore, does it?

that kinda thing.

"Oh your phone can order pad thai delivery, and play an endless variety of Jewel games?
I eat steak, I read Dean Koontz, and I use my phone to CALL people".

"Kids don't go OUTSIDE any more"

that cronut you're eating? 46363 Central American sugar cane workers died last year to make it that sweet. now its not so sweet, is it? well, is it? wait, what do you mean it IS!? hmmm, it does look awfully tasty...

that air you're breathing? 62 million people who breathed that air died last year. not so fresh anymore, is it?

You have to admit it's pretty cool that all products mass-produced in China involve no labor at all and are built by nanorobot swarms.

That's not a cool way to refer to Chinese people dude

"i always think its a bad idea in any store to have any kind of negative signage"

Worst example I've seen was a fast food joint right next to a McDonalds restaurant. They'd chosen to hang a parody sign behind the counter that said "McShit." Great idea to make your customers think about shit as they're deciding what to order.
Didn't help that the place was absolutely filthy.

There's a grocery store down the street from me (across the street from Je55e) that is pretty notorious for that kind of thing. I really hate that. It makes me not want to patronize that business at all because why do I want to give my money to some hostile, childish jerk?

oh, marketplace?

Oh yeah.

we are NOT this and we do NOT do this. really bugs me. just do what you do, dude.

The gym I used to go to was run by an unstable guy who would post signs and copies of correspondence relating to his feud with the bar next door. What good did he hope would come of putting up a sign accusing them of letting raw sewage leak into the showers?

More akin to the NO WIFI HERE sign, he taped a rude, long-winded notice on the window saying that their internet cafe was for CH337AH GYM MEMBERS ONLY.

Yes! I was going to mention that gym, too.

worst sign I ever saw on a business was "STUFF THAT IN YOUR TOWEL, TALIBAN" from some auto parts store post 9/11.

I WANT SOME FREEDOM SPARK PLUGS

My boss went out of town and I got to live the high life, using his card to park in the parking deck across the street instead of parking underneath the freeway overpass half a mile away.

But the deck management has this typewritten sign (TYPEWRITTEN, I said) taped to one of the booth windows handing down THE LAW to the no-good valets who work the Downtown Marriott a block over. NO LOUD MUSIC. NO SQUEALING TIRES. NO SPEEDING DOWN THE RAMPS.

It made me (a.) hesitate ever staying at the Marriott and letting valet service park my car and (b.) ever parking in this deck under my own monetary volition should I ever endanger myself to a fleet of servicemen who squeal tires and speed down the ramps.

they don't do that, as the sign commands them against it

http://sphotos-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1256494_584156691644523_1245406312_n.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/TheA3.png

omg so tempted to post that as a response. that or

http://i.imgur.com/j74SykU.gif

http://static.tvfanatic.com/images/gallery/gob-makes-money.jpg