itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

poor dudes

must be so humiliating to be not as good at yoga as a GIRL

did you guys ever see that King of the Hill episode where Johnny Depp plays a yoga instructor

or the film Hollywood Homicide where Josh Hartnett is a yoga instructor and he's totally doing it to bang all the hot yoga chicks

"Sometimes it can be intimidating with the girls in there that can bend into a pretzel, and you're just sitting there like, 'Okay...can any bros just help me out with this chub i got going?"

sorry i'm getting a huge 'uhh yeah dude' craigslist dramatic reading vibe from this whole story

lol goole

this is not specific to "broga" & i've likely gone off about it before but i just want to take a sec to absolutely despise this phenomenon of the masculinizing portmanteau.

good work with the seo buzzwords i guess & thank you for metastasizing gender binary fascism across the name of any conceivable gender-neutral thing in the universe, nice, real cool

welcome to the dude-iverse

i just learned about power yogurt, aka yogurt in a black and red package for men

those are the correct man product colors

http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/files/2009/08/2405941831_eb1ccafca7.jpg

strong enough for a woman
pH balanced for an insufferable prick

the entire "men's products" aisle at target is blue, black, and red -- even the sign iirc! (black and red)
blue is also ok for men

i got lost there once looking for tom's deodorant (which i found in the women's aisle) (but i was buying it for a man)

Ugh, reminds me of the horrors of Coke Zero -- the ads for that were the worst.

http://www.alde.com/anime/pocky1.jpg

http://img.youtube.com/vi/3iuG1OpnHP8/0.jpg

http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/rBtp4NWg_ks/maxresdefault.jpg

I want to make fun of it, but that sounds tasty.
xxp the chocolate-pretzel, that is

how is Pocky For Men different from Gender-Neutral Pocky

i think most of this has been covered on the marketing of masculinity thread tbh?

^^^ mansplanation

xxp apparently it is less sweet. I think in Pocky's case the "men" might be in contrast to "children" rather than "women"

iirc men's pocky is dark chocolate

in the broga video, there appear to be two or three women working out?

it's cool, they're fem-bros

you still see dark chocolate sold as 'Herrenschokolade' in germany

yeah Men's Pocky is dark chocolate and gets a pass for being tasty, but I haven't seen it in a while.

I'm holding out for Zumbrah. It presumably looks a lot like the "Party Rock Anthem" video.

OMG I would totally go to Andrew WK Zumba

I.... don't think that was an Andrew WK ref

men's body washes/soaps all smell like desperate teenagers

I dont care if it was I WANT ANDREW WK ZUMBA

just dance to andrew wk, much better than zumba

ha, I'm kinda disappointed myself that it wasn't a WK reference.
I guess real zumba for bros is moshpits and pogoing.

pocky gets a pass forever
there's a woman in the broga class in that fucking video! it's bullshit even within its own context!

prob just trying to get some

http://www.theatlanticwire.com/politics/2013/08/obama-has-now-been-called-first-female-president-five-times/68551/

The Daily Caller's Mark Judge took advantage of this quiet August Tuesday to troll the internet, declaring Barack Obama the the first female president. The thing is, calling the commander in chief a woman has been done before, and done better.

...

TJudge was aided in his effort by a book with the evocative title The Art of Manliness - Manvotionals: Timeless Wisdom and Advice on Living the 7 Manly Virtues. (It's here, if you want to buy it, but it is recommended you wait until the end of this article before so indulging.) The titular seven virtues were sifted from the history of our great civilization by Brett McKay and his wife Kate, who live in Tulsa, Oklahoma. (Credentials: "Brett McKay is a man. Kate McKay loves manly men.")

http://laidnyc.wordpress.com/2013/06/04/the-big-list-of-slut-tells/

Fucks the first night you meet her

hah well

Think that blog is a bit too fringe/openly sociopathic for this thread's remit, but it's quite an eye opener

god, I was calling some dickhead early-20s kids out on that over the weekend. takes two people to fuck on the first date, buddy

Claims she was “abused” in the past

Frequently travels to party destinations

Uses drugs (the words “coke” and “whore” go together like peanut butter and jelly)

http://laidnyc.wordpress.com/2013/08/14/closure-is-bullshit/

Jesus, why did I open that. Commenter Dave at least recognises the complexity of life:

Dave
June 5, 2013 at 1:27 am

what if she has some qualities on this list, but has some good ones also? do you weigh the pros and cons and decide based on which is heaviest?

man just walk away

that is spectacular. this is almost poll-worthy

Comes from a poor or lower class family.
Sorority girl
Has an unhealthy diet
She’s attractive, yet goes long lengths of time without a boyfriend
Is on multiple social media accounts that she updates
Is passionately liberal and feminist
Moves frequently
Has lots of “guy friends”
Has a gay bff and/or orbits several gay guys and/or loves gay culture in general
Dates younger men (no matter what her age or how small the age gap)
Is really into the concert or electronic dance scene
Has male hobbies (sports, gambling, etc.)

has an even number of fingers.
is exceptionally tall.
is a blonde.
is a brunette.
wears lots of makeup.
wears no makeup.
lives in a city.
lives in a suburb.

can't believe that dave would consider dating a slut.

posts on messageboards.
doesn't spend time on social media.

doesn't like to read.
is always reading.

I bought My New Gender Workbook today, itt Kate Bornstein instructs me to be a gender

guys this thread is for gross masculinity worship, not gross misogyny.