"well this is awkward"
― conrad, Monday, 22 July 2013 14:44 (twelve years ago)
"May I have a sip of your water, please?"
― Z S, Monday, 22 July 2013 14:46 (twelve years ago)
"there are plenty of other fish in the sea. "
― estela, Monday, 22 July 2013 14:50 (twelve years ago)
was trying to find a way of using that for a long time this morning.
― Shamrock Shoe (LocalGarda), Monday, 22 July 2013 14:51 (twelve years ago)
"Pass the me, please"
― sassy, fun, and RELATABLE (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 July 2013 14:52 (twelve years ago)
"So strictly speaking I'm really not a vegetarian option."
― sassy, fun, and RELATABLE (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 July 2013 14:54 (twelve years ago)
"You feel like a fish out of water? Fuck you, asshole."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 22 July 2013 14:57 (twelve years ago)
"there is something fishy about this but i won't carp on, cod knows this isn't the time or the plaice and you've likely haddock up to here with my bullshark. eel see myself trout"
― Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 22 July 2013 15:00 (twelve years ago)
"I shit in your dinner."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 22 July 2013 15:01 (twelve years ago)
"You misheard; it wasn't a Groupon deal, it was a grouper deal."
― Esperanto, why don't you come to your senses? (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Monday, 22 July 2013 15:11 (twelve years ago)
"Holy crap, your name's John Dory too?"
― click here to start exploding (ledge), Monday, 22 July 2013 15:12 (twelve years ago)
http://i.imgur.com/raLIi9t.jpg
― Z S, Monday, 22 July 2013 15:14 (twelve years ago)
"me? straight into the food industry right outta school"
― mundane peaceable username (darraghmac), Monday, 22 July 2013 15:20 (twelve years ago)
"you simply must try the veal."
― Shamrock Shoe (LocalGarda), Monday, 22 July 2013 15:48 (twelve years ago)
"It was a cookbook!?"
― Øystein, Monday, 22 July 2013 15:58 (twelve years ago)
"yeah I guess the kitchen staff are kinda making fun of you for dining alone"
― conrad, Monday, 22 July 2013 16:09 (twelve years ago)
"so, uh, what's the uh, what's the fork for, man?"
― mundane peaceable username (darraghmac), Monday, 22 July 2013 16:11 (twelve years ago)
"You're no catch of the day yourself."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 22 July 2013 16:12 (twelve years ago)
"Pleeeeeeee-e-e-e-e-e-ease d-o-o-o-n't eeeeee-e-e-e-a-t me L-i-i-i-i-i-sa!"
― Poliopolice, Monday, 22 July 2013 16:16 (twelve years ago)
"FISH, MUTHAFUKKAZ!!"
― Poliopolice, Monday, 22 July 2013 16:17 (twelve years ago)
don't look at me, i ordered chicken.
― IIIrd Datekeeper (contenderizer), Monday, 22 July 2013 16:33 (twelve years ago)
tonight's special will be my friend bob. he'll be served on zucchini coulis with rice pilaf and grilled endive.
― IIIrd Datekeeper (contenderizer), Monday, 22 July 2013 16:34 (twelve years ago)
"wait til u see the steak!"
― zvookster, Monday, 22 July 2013 17:59 (twelve years ago)
"i take the sush out of sushi"
vg
― mundane peaceable username (darraghmac), Monday, 22 July 2013 18:33 (twelve years ago)
"i wonder sometimes if i am the victim of a malicious meunière"
― estela, Thursday, 25 July 2013 19:52 (twelve years ago)
ah..
― Mark G, Friday, 26 July 2013 11:02 (twelve years ago)
Golf/Surgery ones too dismal to relate..
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/08/05/p465/130805_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Monday, 29 July 2013 15:42 (twelve years ago)
"wait'll you see my dick"
― congratulations (n/a), Monday, 29 July 2013 15:47 (twelve years ago)
lol
― PJ. Turquoise dealer. Chatroulette addict. Andersonville. (Hurting 2), Monday, 29 July 2013 15:51 (twelve years ago)
submit it
― My Buddy® of sexting (DJP), Monday, 29 July 2013 15:52 (twelve years ago)
"Our specials tonight are tuba and C brass."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 29 July 2013 15:52 (twelve years ago)
"ignore me now bitches"
― clique- your heels, together (darraghmac), Monday, 29 July 2013 15:57 (twelve years ago)
"yes that is the original plughole from psycho. well spotted."
― Shamrock Shoe (LocalGarda), Monday, 29 July 2013 15:58 (twelve years ago)
"No, that wasn't my spit valve"
― Z S, Monday, 29 July 2013 15:58 (twelve years ago)
"Euphonium? You just met him!"
― PJ. Turquoise dealer. Chatroulette addict. Andersonville. (Hurting 2), Monday, 29 July 2013 16:22 (twelve years ago)
"if you need to fart, just let me know"
― congratulations (n/a), Monday, 29 July 2013 16:22 (twelve years ago)
"i beg your pardon, but madam most certainly did order it"
― clique- your heels, together (darraghmac), Monday, 29 July 2013 16:35 (twelve years ago)
"I'm afraid we're out of the sea bass, can I get you a tuba?""Funny you should ask: I _am_ in a band.""It's 11:59, we close at midnight and trust me: you don't want to be here late."
― sassy, fun, and RELATABLE (forksclovetofu), Monday, 29 July 2013 16:53 (twelve years ago)
here's a more "new yorker" submission: "we used to have a mariachi band but, you know... downsizing."
― congratulations (n/a), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:10 (twelve years ago)
"I've heard of the 'Pot Noodle Horn', but this is just ridiculous..."
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:16 (twelve years ago)
"Fixing the sign was too expensive, so we went all in with the Sousages concept."
― Øystein, Monday, 29 July 2013 17:17 (twelve years ago)
i beg your pardon, but madam most certainly did order it"
― clique- your heels, together (darraghmac), Monday, July 29, 2013 12:35 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
this is the one
― PJ. Turquoise dealer. Chatroulette addict. Andersonville. (Hurting 2), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:17 (twelve years ago)
"If you think I'm bad, wait until the drummer does a ten minute solo."
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:17 (twelve years ago)
"Sorry miss, I could have swore I heard your husband call for a horo."
― Øystein, Monday, 29 July 2013 17:18 (twelve years ago)
"If you're wondering about the cartoonist's name, his parents really hated him."
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:19 (twelve years ago)
"If you think this looks stupid wait until the contrabass serpent guy shows up."
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:20 (twelve years ago)
"U got the horn so why don't U blow it?"
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:21 (twelve years ago)
"It's all part of our March Madness package."
― Øystein, Monday, 29 July 2013 17:21 (twelve years ago)
"Would you like to order dessert?" How about some Mousse T?"
― slamming on the dubstep brakes (snoball), Monday, 29 July 2013 17:23 (twelve years ago)