(in a yiddish accent) "What can I say? I won them in the girraffle."
― huun huurt 2 (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 18:35 (eleven years ago) link
"Think they misread the part before 'Rides For Free' on the bumper sticker"
― Retreat from the Sunship (James Redd and the Blecchs), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 19:10 (eleven years ago) link
"Christ, what a giraffe"
― UTW, USA, ILX LIFER (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 20:31 (eleven years ago) link
Amazon insist that this was the order as received
― al leong the watchtower (darraghmac), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 20:59 (eleven years ago) link
"This is a funny looking coffee table. Did you follow the self assembly instructions correctly?"
― Camp Macaroni Style (snoball), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 21:04 (eleven years ago) link
'who is your favorite marketplace reporter? mine is chana giraffe-wolt'
― Philip Nunez, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 21:14 (eleven years ago) link
"and then bitcoin plummeted, so now we do this for awhile i guess."
― am0n, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 21:36 (eleven years ago) link
"I think I'm still in shock about how badly I fucked up, like I'm not really dealing with it yet, you know? Because this is terrible."
― Treeship, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 21:56 (eleven years ago) link
"I wish I was taller."
― lazulum, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 22:55 (eleven years ago) link
"what giraffes?"
― your holiness, we have an official energy drink (Z S), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:42 (eleven years ago) link
"....and then I got to thinking, well, in a flood, I mean a real flood, standing on a cat or whatever aint gonna do you any good, but..."
― al leong the watchtower (darraghmac), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:45 (eleven years ago) link
"I'll give them this, they got a helluva union"
― al leong the watchtower (darraghmac), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:47 (eleven years ago) link
"I've read Leviticus- these're the only fucking things we can eat."
― al leong the watchtower (darraghmac), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:48 (eleven years ago) link
haha those are all great
― Treeship, Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:51 (eleven years ago) link
Your last one was the most 'ilx' funny imo
― al leong the watchtower (darraghmac), Tuesday, 7 May 2013 23:52 (eleven years ago) link
"Guess those antediluvian bridge makers weren't so incompetent after all"
― Retreat from the Sunship (James Redd and the Blecchs), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 00:41 (eleven years ago) link
leviticus one + treeship's "dealing with it" + girraffle + We're too late + rabbits are all lulz.
― stefon taylor swiftboat (s.clover), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:08 (eleven years ago) link
"Look at their fuzzy little faces and then tell me you would have said no."
― stefon taylor swiftboat (s.clover), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:16 (eleven years ago) link
"I know what you're thinking. But this is really just one giant giraffe-headed hydra"
― stefon taylor swiftboat (s.clover), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:19 (eleven years ago) link
Liking pretty much all of these
― Retreat from the Sunship (James Redd and the Blecchs), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:19 (eleven years ago) link
"I hope you know what you're doing. We've got a whole lot of necks on the line here."
― stefon taylor swiftboat (s.clover), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:24 (eleven years ago) link
"Jehovah? I thought he said his name was Jah-Raffe"
― Poliopolice, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:32 (eleven years ago) link
"Look, it's a small ark, and there's a surprising abundance of giraffe species. Priorities had to be set."
― lazulum, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 01:42 (eleven years ago) link
"So this is what happens when you get me drunk. I wonder what happens the next time."
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 02:17 (eleven years ago) link
along those lines
"Well that must have been some bachelor party. I imagine it will take us up until the wedding to piece together the sequence of events last night that led to this incongruous situation."
― stefon taylor swiftboat (s.clover), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 02:29 (eleven years ago) link
"Every ship has girats."
― EZ Snappin, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 02:33 (eleven years ago) link
Union joke is excellent
― UTW, USA, ILX LIFER (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:03 (eleven years ago) link
"Act natural; there's a low bridge coming up fast."
― Grampsy, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:06 (eleven years ago) link
"I'm not good at this job."
― Poliopolice, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:15 (eleven years ago) link
"Fuck what God says. What's he gonna do, fire me?"
― Poliopolice, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:16 (eleven years ago) link
"Fuck what God says. I'm running this ship."
― Poliopolice, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:19 (eleven years ago) link
"Giraffes, muthafukkaz!!"
"i wish new yorker cartton captions could just be a glance, a gesture, a shifting of hands... punchlines are too direct. they don't penetrate the heart of the image, or the reality it discloses and at the same time conceals."
^ this is a caption
― Treeship, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 04:34 (eleven years ago) link
"you remembered the giraffes alright but what about the beer?"
― Treeship, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 05:32 (eleven years ago) link
God, I'm so sick of this Gir-Raffi tape.
― Poliopolice, Wednesday, 8 May 2013 14:36 (eleven years ago) link
this is killing me
― far too much asshole flesh (DJP), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 14:58 (eleven years ago) link
"oh you said GI-ant RAFT"
― congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 8 May 2013 14:59 (eleven years ago) link
"Because I got high."
― jaymc, Thursday, 9 May 2013 03:25 (eleven years ago) link
"I'm not planning to go anywhere particular, it's the voyage that matters"
― Van Horn Street, Thursday, 9 May 2013 12:59 (eleven years ago) link
"YOLO!"
― Camp Macaroni Style (snoball), Thursday, 9 May 2013 13:42 (eleven years ago) link
"I thought you'd like it."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 9 May 2013 13:44 (eleven years ago) link
"Emzara.... Will you marry me?"
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 9 May 2013 13:59 (eleven years ago) link
"We're never gonna survive unless we get a little... crazy."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:00 (eleven years ago) link
'You know that when we get back to the boardroom Lord Sugar's going to be all "this is a bleedin' shambles", right?'
― Camp Macaroni Style (snoball), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:21 (eleven years ago) link
"and they said zoos were exploitative."
― whiskey and ice cream sandwiches (Treeship), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:27 (eleven years ago) link
"Think about it, we'll be the sole supplier in all of Waterworld!"
― lazulum, Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:28 (eleven years ago) link
"This mash up of 'Speed 2' and 'Ace Ventura' isn't working out."
― Camp Macaroni Style (snoball), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:29 (eleven years ago) link
"The way my back is these days, ease of milking was paramount"
― i gave ten pounds and all i got was a lousy * (darraghmac), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:34 (eleven years ago) link
"Naaah, everyone'sdoing alpacas now, we're way ahead of the curve on this"
― i gave ten pounds and all i got was a lousy * (darraghmac), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:37 (eleven years ago) link
DJP's still wins, but "union" is great too
― Guayaquil (eephus!), Thursday, 9 May 2013 14:39 (eleven years ago) link