Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

xp credit for that bon mot goes to Je555e.

In Chicago we say "if you don't like the weather in Chicago, wait 5 minutes, then go fuck yourself."

Loll xpost

wow, cleveland and weather on the same shirt. I'm aroused.

Carl said it correctly. No need to wait 5 minutes to go fuck yourself.

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2013/04/i_married_young_what_are_the_rest_of_you_waiting_for.html

David took the bar exam shortly before our first wedding anniversary. This should have warranted a lavish vacation: Most new lawyers celebrate finishing the bar exam with a trip to Europe or Asia.

This woman is way out of touch with reality.

I’m a married millennial. I walked down the aisle at 23. My husband, David, was 25. We hadn’t arrived. I had a job; he, a job offer and a year left in law school. But we couldn’t buy a house or even replace the car when it died a few months into our marriage. We lived in a small basement apartment, furnished with secondhand Ikea. We did not have Internet (checking email required a trip to the local coffee shop) or reliable heat.

Oh fuck you so much, you were "poor" when you got married because you knew you still had to wait another 9 months before your husband would earn $160,000 a year at a large law firm.

(the only kind of "job offer" you tend to have with a year of school left -- smaller firms don't hire like that)

and carl agatha otm. We spent an overnight at the beach, and then I went to work.

Although I guess Jeff and I did take a vacation that also doubled as a two-year delayed honeymoon to Glennwood Springs, CO after I took the bar exam. Never mind. She's right. Everybody get married in your early 20s.

I thought lawyers celebrated passing the bar by looking at their debt load and crying

this wasn't really an innocuous thing but it didn't seem quid-ag appropriate either

Also find it weird that her point of comparison is unmarried mid-20s people who "don't realize that they're a separate unit" from their parents or w/e.

I thought lawyers celebrated passing the bar by looking at their debt load and crying

That's just your typical Friday night.

Just me and my pals, Sally Mae and Jim Beam, crying until we puke.

Aren't there statistics about divorce rates among couples who marry young being higher? Something about divorce rates going down if you marry after 30, or maybe that's just women who marry after 30.

LOL Amanda Marcotte is already on it: http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2013/04/02/a_reply_to_julia_shaw_women_marry_later_because_they_don_t_want_to_get_divorced.html

If you'd gotten married earlier, you could afford something better than Jim Beam.

I was 33 when we got married. *drinks Laphroig from golden chalice*

I think "don't RULE OUT getting married in your mid 20s" is a good message, like, don't assume that you can't figure shit out with another person in your life, or that it might not even help you if it's the right person. That's pretty much my life. But she takes it a lot further than that.

Wait, maybe I was 34.

I'm so old and drunk I can't remember anything anymore.

I got married when I was 21 and my wife was 20. We both went back to work (me at a bookstore, her at a camera store) the next morning. We'll be celebrating our 20th anniversary in June.

mazel tov

i never thought I would marry young at all and here i am 10 yrs later, having married at 24. but ffs I would never say OH YOU SHOULD TOTALLY MARRY IN YOUR 20'S. honestly I was kind of a selfish asshole until I was almost 30. I think you see a lot of things much more clearly in yr 30's and fuck anyone who says there's a good time to be married.

Yeah, I think it's as absurd to say that all people who marry young will get divorced as it is to say that everybody should marry young. The stats are that people who marry young have a higher divorce rate, but that says nothing about individual couples.

Plus I think that particular statistic reflects remaining societal pressure on people to get married by a certain age and/or pressure to get married to "legitimize" a pregnancy, causing people to marry whomever is around and willing. As that pressure abates, people are still going to get married young but for reasons other than "I got knocked up and had to" or "I was the only single 23 year old woman in my high school graduating class" and that will lead to that divorce statistic evening out. Re: getting married due to pregnancy, something I read recently showed that we've almost past the point where more babies are born outside of marriages than in, so that's going to change quickly. It was in the same article showing that women are marrying older, on the whole, and delaying fertility but not to the same extent.

I got married when I was 27 and my wife was 25 and that felt sort of "old" at the time, but we grew up in a place where lots of people have like four kids by that age. The actual wedding part is sort of arbitrary I guess as we'd been together since I was 20 and are still together as I approach 39.

I guess I can see that I benefitted from a sort of naivete in meeting my wife at 22, not having gone through the ringer of internet dating and the like. I was at an age where I was just ready to trust and accept someone (although I in no way realized this at the time) and not go down a checklist of qualities. I do feel like some of my friends are stuck in an infinite dating loop. But then I also have friends who got into amazing marriages at 38. These things are very individual.

"You know what they say about [THIS GEOGRAPHICAL AREA]. Wait around five minutes and the weather will change to something else!"

Everybody in every contiguous state says this, btw. I'd bet they even say it in Seattle ("Sometimes it rains, sometimes it doesn't!")

― pplains, Wednesday, 3 April 2013 00:42 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you could extrapolate this beyond america with reasonable success

They probably don't say that in Arizona

'You know what they say about Arizona. Wait around five minutes and burst into flames.'

"Then go fuck yourself."

http://wilkinscommunity.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/MDweather.jpg

i've seen this edited for a couple other states too

yeah I've spent a few month in Colorado and that's basically otm for them

melbourne could actually be freakish because in cape town (where the weather is freakish) they were all 'omg you're from that place where the weather's freakish like it is here'

and then they would kill us and take our jewellery

People constantly talking about how they don't really use the internet, it's the new "I don't own a TV".

I haven't heard anyone say that, but that's a strange thing to boast about.

yeah haven't heard that one

does "i'm not on facebook" count

"I don't even use the internet"

*unfolds giant map in the middle of city street*
*whips out zagat guidebook and compass*

*pulls out encyclopedia britannica to settle argument*

i don't use a smartphone so the zagat guidebook and compass set comes in handy! :(

*calls son to ask who was the guy in the wheelchair in ironside*

*turns on radio, waits 16 minutes for news bulletin*

*navigates using starcharts*

*steps out onto stoop to check the weather*

*gets witticisms from Reader's Digest*

when you are in the rightmost lane to make a right turn on red and someone to the left of you going straight pulls her minivan waaaaaaaaay up into the crosswalk so you'd have to go into the road to see if anyone's coming. and at the same time is doing that thing where people hold the phone up near their chin. so they can talk while driving and think it's not as illegal or something.

hate that, the pulling way out next to you so you can't see a goddamn thing

got waved through a left hand turn by someone turning right...the other day I was twice waved through crosswalks by pedestrians waiting to cross. I've HAD it with these people. Time wasters AND scofflaws. They understand that the law requires me to to give way to them. That I'm not stopping out of the kindness of my heart. And that them making me wait longer with their, NO YOU GO little hand dance makes me want swerve and drive right into them.

she wasn't just doing it by accident either. like she was next to me, then crept up, then looked at me! in the eyes! fuck you mom