Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

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Im not that funny irl either, devise another proof

mister borges (darraghmac), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:42 (thirteen years ago)

"And now we will fork their repos with our massive dongles"

emil.y, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:46 (thirteen years ago)

loooool

Darth Icky (DJP), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 19:07 (thirteen years ago)

"As you can see on page 3, Lysol now accounts for 23% of our yearly budget."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:21 (thirteen years ago)

"Those fucking suppliers really left us holding our dicks on this one."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:22 (thirteen years ago)

"Is this is breast we can do? Um, best. Sorry, I'm a little dicktracted. Um, distracted. Fuck me."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:26 (thirteen years ago)

"This fellow Tom Leonard will pay dearly for his transgressions."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:27 (thirteen years ago)

"Team, Chatroulette is falling on tough times in this economy."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:28 (thirteen years ago)

"Sigh... No, Nancy, you cannot get pregnant from an Aeron chair."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:29 (thirteen years ago)

"I have reason to believe that someone switched my Mountain Dew with urine."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:36 (thirteen years ago)

Guys tom wouldnt touch any of those, up the game ffs

mister borges (darraghmac), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:47 (thirteen years ago)

"Guys. Lysol. 23%. You do the math."

Poliopolice, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:50 (thirteen years ago)

There it is

mister borges (darraghmac), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 20:50 (thirteen years ago)

"Nobody laugh when I turn around or you're fired"

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 21 March 2013 00:06 (thirteen years ago)

"Chair was gettin' sticky"

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 21 March 2013 00:07 (thirteen years ago)

addition to yr first one: "we fell 37% below predicted growth for this year."

Merdeyeux, Thursday, 21 March 2013 00:23 (thirteen years ago)

"I said causal Fridays. You know, where we'd determine the antecedent conditions that were responsible for consequent events? Come on, people!"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:30 (thirteen years ago)

"As you'll see momentarily, the fiscal crisis has left me with only a stack of dimes."

EZ Snappin, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:32 (thirteen years ago)

"When I said dress code was business casual, I meant business casual at every other business except American Apparel! Of course, that doesn't quite explain why I'm not wearing clothes either, does it?"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:33 (thirteen years ago)

"Activate interlock! Dynotherms connected. Infracells up. Mega thrusters are go. FORM VOLTRON!"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:35 (thirteen years ago)

"I'm really digging these new casual fridays."

s.clover, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:38 (thirteen years ago)

"Wow! This place is swank! Can I just say-- this ain't your father's gas chamber!"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:39 (thirteen years ago)

"Hey, I think this is a one-way mirror."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:40 (thirteen years ago)

"you know, i could have sworn the recruiter said this was a news agency."

s.clover, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:40 (thirteen years ago)

"Lena, you seem cold. Are you cold?"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:41 (thirteen years ago)

"I like staring at your nude bodies as I work. I find it... erotic."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:42 (thirteen years ago)

"I bet my dick looks like ants to all those people."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:43 (thirteen years ago)

"...and to think-- all those fuckers thought I couldn't build a successful Fortune 500 business where every employee experiences a daily regimen of degrading sexual humiliation and brutal genital torture."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 01:48 (thirteen years ago)

"Let's focus, people"

( ( ( ( ( ( ( (Z S), Thursday, 21 March 2013 15:38 (thirteen years ago)

"Hey, we should bring back the suggest ban button" xp

space phwoar (Hurting 2), Thursday, 21 March 2013 15:43 (thirteen years ago)

"let's focus, people" kills me

Walter Galt, Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:57 (thirteen years ago)

yes that is brilliant. it's what a real new yorker cartoon would have as its caption but doesn't stand a chance in hell for the competition.

TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:07 (thirteen years ago)

Thomas C Leonard, can you go ahead and submit that for me? Thanks!

- Zach

( ( ( ( ( ( ( (Z S), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:14 (thirteen years ago)

"B-b-b-butt b-b-b-butt b-b-butt...!"

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:28 (thirteen years ago)

"You know what gets me hard? WINNING."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:10 (thirteen years ago)

"That is my vision for the company. No ifs or ands."

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:24 (thirteen years ago)

^ that's a winner.

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:25 (thirteen years ago)

looooooool

you gotta submit that DJP

( ( ( ( ( ( ( (Z S), Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:57 (thirteen years ago)

I already have

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:57 (thirteen years ago)

Takin no chances, good man

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:58 (thirteen years ago)

that is one of the few times i have actually lol'd at a NYer caption, rather than mildly blowing air out of my nostrils and thinking "HMMM!"

( ( ( ( ( ( ( (Z S), Thursday, 21 March 2013 19:58 (thirteen years ago)

"Let's focus, people"

― ( ( ( ( ( ( ( (Z S),

i petted a bodega cat today. (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 21 March 2013 20:16 (thirteen years ago)

"Mother... tell your children not to walk my wayyyyy.... tell your children not to hear my words... Mother..."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:14 (thirteen years ago)

"Just then we heard a crash... Donald's dick broke the glass."

Half of these sound like rappers. (snoball), Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:20 (thirteen years ago)

"Here's my impression of GG Allin."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:23 (thirteen years ago)

boo you can only submit one entry

someone enter this: "Now that the entire board has bought in, we can introduce Emperor Businesswear to the public."

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:25 (thirteen years ago)

also it occurs to me that the "Christ, what an asshole" caption takes on a new dimension here

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:25 (thirteen years ago)

"I think we will be able to attract top talent with our open floor plans, flex time scheduling, child care, telecommuting options, and casual dress code."

Poliopolice, Thursday, 21 March 2013 21:33 (thirteen years ago)

"Get mad you son-of-a-bitch. Get mad. You know what it takes to sell real-estate?"

Øystein, Friday, 22 March 2013 00:33 (thirteen years ago)

"I think we can all agree THAT didn't work."

i petted a bodega cat today. (forksclovetofu), Friday, 22 March 2013 02:37 (thirteen years ago)


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