Rolling 'this is sexist' thread

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I'm glad I was raised by ILX and not some other message board. who knows what sort of jackassery I'd be committing right now.

Heyman (crüt), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 17:48 (thirteen years ago)

btw I got off on the wrong foot w/this because whatever I read first made me think two guys were having a private moronic conversation between friends, not that tweeter + guy 1 were having a perfectly civil conversation when guy 2 started his "huh huh, dicks" routine at both of them and then wouldn't shut up when she signalled her dissatisfaction. when I read this later I was like "well that changes things a bit" when I should actually have thought "well that changes things completely"

also DJP's comment re egos was totally OTM but it pushed a button re something unrelated I've been thinking abt lately plus the implied "unlike some other people here" before "I try very hard not to let my ego make me into a raging dick" rubbed me the wrong way so I apologise for going off on that conflated w/ elmo's "patronising" comment

going to sign up for lessons on not letting my ego make me into a raging dick in future

susuwatari teenage riot (a passing spacecadet), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:11 (thirteen years ago)

our jackassery is cheeky and witty xp

btw spacecadet, it's not that it was "harassment" as much as talking like that is inappropriate and contributes to a hostile environment. No one was specifically targeted, as far as I can tell nobody made any comments specifically because they were sitting near someone who might be offended.

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:13 (thirteen years ago)

haha I am so sorry, I was going for an implied "despite what my behavior would lead you to believe"!

Darth Icky (DJP), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:14 (thirteen years ago)

can we please stop saying "raging dick"

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:16 (thirteen years ago)

haha

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:21 (thirteen years ago)

DJP don't be sorry, that and your post about expectations of privacy were useful new perspectives on things which had been bothering me lately (or, how I began to realise that howling daily on the IA thread about other people's behaviour is a sign that I need to check my own ego and also calm the hell down)

mh, it's not that after 15 years as an ugly shy woman in the IT industry I have never felt fucking sick of the all-lads-together banter and the big "you don't belong here" flags it puts up but unable to say so: I do totally get that nobody needs to be specifically targeted to feel excluded by that stuff. but I also think you probably don't need to spend very long at a programming conference to hear something worse than dongle jokes, and while it would be great if even the dongle jokes didn't exist, if it had been a private conversation (which it wasn't) I think that would have been a completely different case, yes

obviously there are levels, like of course a "private conversation" of rape jokes behind a woman should still be called out, and no I don't know where I'd draw the line

susuwatari teenage riot (a passing spacecadet), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:36 (thirteen years ago)

^ otm font

mister borges (darraghmac), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 18:45 (thirteen years ago)

firing them is obv total overreaction.

The correct pronunciation is "AWESOME overreaction", I think you'll find.

Andrew Farrell, Wednesday, 20 March 2013 21:19 (thirteen years ago)

*checks*

no

mister borges (darraghmac), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 21:40 (thirteen years ago)

but dmac a guy who wasn't an internet feminist lost his job

k3vin k., Wednesday, 20 March 2013 21:47 (thirteen years ago)

sorry that was dickish. anyway the weight of the evidence seems to support my original assumption that taking a picture of the idiot was kind of weird

k3vin k., Wednesday, 20 March 2013 21:48 (thirteen years ago)

thanks for not putting me on this thread everyone

maura, Thursday, 21 March 2013 03:35 (thirteen years ago)

Wait til you see how much fun the ones about gender politics are.

lets just remember to blame the patriarchy for (in orbit), Thursday, 21 March 2013 04:26 (thirteen years ago)

or the ones where white straighties offer us their moral rubric on hiv disclosure

Woody Ellen (Matt P), Thursday, 21 March 2013 04:30 (thirteen years ago)

We have all of the fun here on the internet.

lets just remember to blame the patriarchy for (in orbit), Thursday, 21 March 2013 04:30 (thirteen years ago)

we do!

Woody Ellen (Matt P), Thursday, 21 March 2013 04:31 (thirteen years ago)

ilx is p tame as far as these things go really

my god i only have 2 useless beyblade (silby), Thursday, 21 March 2013 04:32 (thirteen years ago)

wite straighty is my yahoo handle

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 08:40 (thirteen years ago)

but on AIM i'm privileged1

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 08:41 (thirteen years ago)

No, definitely awesome - there are overreactions all over the place (see as noted the comments to this and everything), it's awesome to see one pointing in the right direction.

Andrew Farrell, Thursday, 21 March 2013 10:19 (thirteen years ago)

Thats not how shitty overreaction aggregation works imo but i can see the point

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 10:35 (thirteen years ago)

I and two other dad associates got called "wimpy" today by a female partner for wanting to be able to see our kids every day. Like I said, I'm glad that the older generation is going to die.

space phwoar (Hurting 2), Thursday, 21 March 2013 14:00 (thirteen years ago)

have you ever seen the tv show Damages, Hurting?

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Thursday, 21 March 2013 14:13 (thirteen years ago)

Should tweet her obv

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 14:23 (thirteen years ago)

;)

space phwoar (Hurting 2), Thursday, 21 March 2013 14:49 (thirteen years ago)

I and two other dad associates got called "wimpy" today by a female partner for wanting to be able to see our kids every day. Like I said, I'm glad that the older generation is going to die.

― space phwoar (Hurting 2), Thursday, March 21, 2013 10:00 AM (52 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ugh.

how's life, Thursday, 21 March 2013 14:54 (thirteen years ago)

Yeah sickens me to see that type of ageism on ilx

mister borges (darraghmac), Thursday, 21 March 2013 15:07 (thirteen years ago)

Okay, so apparently Adria's workplace has been subject to vengeful DDoS attacks and now they've fired HER. What the...?

emil.y, Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:47 (thirteen years ago)

jesus christ

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:48 (thirteen years ago)

yeah just saw that, but I'm wondering if it might be fake? Just really hard for me to believe a company would be stupid enough to fire her over this.

space phwoar (Hurting 2), Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:48 (thirteen years ago)

http://venturebeat.com/2013/03/21/breaking-adria-richards-fired-by-sendgrid-for-outting-developers-on-twitter/

Does mention the possibility that the SendGrid twitter could've been hacked.

emil.y, Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:49 (thirteen years ago)

what the fuck is going on

Heyman (crüt), Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:55 (thirteen years ago)

(haha no i love this thread and everyone's RATIONALITY in it; yesterday i had an Incident Of Being Called Sexist and i was smarting a little bit)

maura, Thursday, 21 March 2013 16:56 (thirteen years ago)

Was it mentioned in this thread that she was making dick jokes on Twitter a couple of days before this?:

https://twitter.com/adriarichards/status/312265091791847425

‏@skwashd
I made it to US and A. I've received my traditional TSA welcoming - having my nuts fondled.

@adriarichards
@skwashd you should put something in your pants next time...like a bunch of socks inside one...large...sock. TSA agent faint

Walter Galt, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:13 (thirteen years ago)

It has been mentioned *repeatedly* by tiring assholes who don't seem to understand the difference between a twitter feed and a conference. And I say this as someone who supports dongle jokes.

emil.y, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:14 (thirteen years ago)

What does that have to do with anything other than prove the point that there is a context where off-color remarks are acceptable and one where they aren't?

xp: what emil.y said OTM

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:15 (thirteen years ago)

Fair enough. My issue with this thing, anyway, is that I don't think it's okay to take a direct picture of someone without their permission unless they're maybe in the act of committing a crime. I see that as a much greater violation of safety & privacy.

Walter Galt, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:16 (thirteen years ago)

i just think it's hilarious that her lame blog has cloudfare and is doing a decent job of fending off the DDOS while sendgrid is nuked.

sanskrit, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:16 (thirteen years ago)

sanskrit also OTM

Darth Icky (DJP), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:18 (thirteen years ago)

DDoS attacks are so lame and petty.

Heyman (crüt), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:18 (thirteen years ago)

welcome to the patriarchy, I guess.

Heyman (crüt), Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:18 (thirteen years ago)

I don't think it's okay to take a direct picture of someone without their permission unless they're maybe in the act of committing a crime. I see that as a much greater violation of safety & privacy.

― Walter Galt, Thursday, March 21, 2013 1:16 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

lol do u ever go outside then

乒乓, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:18 (thirteen years ago)

Pig people are out in force on this comments thread: https://www.facebook.com/SendGrid/posts/10151502570463967

DavidM, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:19 (thirteen years ago)

new face of corporate america. just keep your head down. if anyone mentions you for any reason ever -- chop.

s.clover, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:20 (thirteen years ago)

'T____ H___ Check ur privieledge.

Mordy, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:21 (thirteen years ago)

the difference between a twitter feed and a conference.

Thinking on this for a second - neither of these things is cut and dry at all. Very public conversation viewable to tens of thousands vs. overheard private conversation, etc.

Walter Galt, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:22 (thirteen years ago)

i hope everyone involved sues everyone else involved until all the companies go bankrupt and their vcs go bankrupt and the banks that funded anyone go bankrupt and then a cleansing fire comes and burns babylon, burns it clean.

s.clover, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:24 (thirteen years ago)

lol do u ever go outside then
― 乒乓, Thursday, March 21, 2013 5:18 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I don't get what you mean. I'm talking about taking direct photos of strangers. I see so many pics on Twitter and elsewhere where the poster has taken a pic of someone who looks funny on the tube or whatever - I think it's a serious asshole move.

Walter Galt, Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:24 (thirteen years ago)

i didn't know 'developer evangelist' was a kind of job now but apparently it is, perhaps that can go in the cleansing fire too

j., Thursday, 21 March 2013 17:25 (thirteen years ago)


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